Is It Wrong to Pick Up Girls In a Dungeon? Ep. 9: Levels mean squat

There’s all this hemming and hawing about how Bellri was really only level one until this week’s episode. So suuuuuure, he’s still weak on magical fantasy paper… but the proof is in the pudding. Here, we have a kid who is growing faster than anyone else. And why? Because he works harder than everyone else? Not necessarily. I’m not saying he doesn’t work hard, but there’s no reason to believe that Bellri is the hardest working person in the entire DanMachi universe. No, we should not forget that he is growing so quickly because he’s in love. Then it gets even worse in this week’s episode… oh, it gets so much worse…

— The big news is that Bellri has finally hit level 2. That sounds like nothing, but it’s all relative. In DanMachi, for our hero to gain a level in just one and a half month makes him more than just a wunderkind. For perspective, it took Eyes a year to gain one level. So blah blah blah, he’s still weaaaaaak. Whatever, man.

— The other big news is that someone is looking for a party… hmm…

— Hestia says that since Bellri is now level 2, he gets a title… I don’t really know what the title does for him, though. Like does it confer any benefits? He also gets a new skill, but we don’t get to find out what it does just yet.

— By the way, the goddess’s outfit is ridiculous here.

— And if anyone still has any doubts about my reading of this show’s dynamics…

— Bellri is hoping to get a “cool” title, but it just shows how childish his mentality really is:

In the end, however, Hestia gets him “Little Rookie.” And of course, his childish mind isn’t excited about it. I mean, you could use it as motivation. Or you could even embrace it ironically.

— First, people hated Bellri because he was weak.

Now they’re annoyed because he’s getting strong. It’s just how these boring universes work. All the girls are in love with the hero, and all the guys hate him. You can simultaneously get your dick sucked while having a pity party, too.

— Blah blah blah, avoid the middle floor because it’s soooooo much harder…

…unless, of course, you have recruit yourself an extra party member! Gosh, now where might I find one?

— In these stories, you can immediately tell who’s a bad guy and who’s not. Shady characters look like this:

So you shouldn’t even bother telling him off. Just have one of your many mommies beat him up. And prospective party members look like this:

Bellri bumps into Welf, the guy that you see above, while looking for an armor upgrade. Luckily enough, Welf just happens to be the very person who made Bellri’s current armor. Wow, such a small world!

— Welf is more than willing to become Bellri’s personal armorsmith. Really? How do you hope to make any money that way? Oh right, he wants to join Bellri’s group. This way, he gets a split of the dungeon drops. But how did he know joining Bellri would be profitable?

— Lili and Welf aren’t instant friends for whatever reason. Reasons I don’t really care about. According to Lili, Welf comes from a long line of fallen blacksmith nobles or something…

— Elsewhere, Eyes and her group are grinding harder than ever because of — you guessed it! — Bellri’s growth. He’s even a great motivator! Bellri just does it all!

— Bellri’s right hand is sparkling all over the place. It’s time for him to pull another special power out of his ass — a special power only available to special snowflakes.

— All of a sudden, they’re attacked by a baby dragon. By RPG logic, you’d meet a baby dragon on the lower floors, then meet some elder, fuck-you-in-the-ass dragon on the upper floors. But in real world logic, what would a baby dragon be doing down here where it can be killed? Ah well.

— Bellri fires just one firebolt at the baby dragon and instantly vaporizes it. Ta-da, his new ability is the ability to overcome any difficulty. I’m not even shitting you. That’s his new ability.

A bloo bloo he’s only level 2. Who gives a fuck what his level is? His skill is literally cheat mode. It’s like he just downloaded a bunch of trainers and blasting his way through the game when everyone else takes a year or more just to gain a level. What’s next? Is he going to fly?

— Anyway. Hestia also doesn’t trust Welf, but of course, does she trust anyone who dares to get close to her Bellri?

— There’s something boring shit about how Welf can make magical equipment, but he stopped because they break easy or some shit. But at the same time, he’s wasting his talents… so everyone wants a magical equipment because they’re strong, but at the same time, they break easily and let the user down. Uh…

— Welf takes that chili pepper minotaur horn from Bellri, and makes a dagger out of it.

It looks like a kitchen knife, though. But nevermind that. Our hero now has two fancy knives. So… uh… is he going to dual-wield?

— There’s a boring scene after the credits. I don’t recommend watching it. I’m saving you time by not even describing it. You didn’t miss anything. So who do you got in the finals? Warriors or Cavs?

— The Food Wars post will come a little later. Not too much later, but not now. Still shaking off the cold from last week, and had to do overtime today, so…