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Some Notes (I guess…)

— Valkana tackles Hyotetsu, and the latter spews a bunch of cryptic nonsense for the sake of being cryptic I was rescued by that person. I did what they told me to do. His lines are practically begging the audience to ask, “Who? Who on earth are you talking about?!” Then of course, Hyotetsu is killed by a mysterious assassin before he can answer. Whoops, I’m sorry. Nobody gets killed. ‘Cause that’s expected. And Mayoiga is totally about subverting tropes and whatnot, so instead, Hyotetsu knocked unconscious by a blunt arrow. Brilliant. Masterful.

— Valkana decides to give chase, leaving Koharun behind with the unconscious Hyotetsu in the middle of a night, in the middle of a forest where crazy shit seems to happen. That seems wise. But hey, Valkana wouldn’t be here if he was known for making wise decisions.

— In any case, say goodbye to these two, because this is the last time we see either of them in this week’s episode. It’s unlikely she can move the guy anywhere by her lonesome, but then again, I thought the same thing about that bus…

— Elsewhere, Mitsumune, Speedstar, and Masaki have a little conversation. This anime is just full of conversations that don’t actually go anywhere. Speedstar asks what you guys have been asking: “You came to look for this Reiji guy, was it? Why would you keep that a secret?” Hey, look, she didn’t want to trouble everyone, alright? Case closed.

— She tried to look for Reiji by herself. That’s why she explored the far end of the tunnel. But it’s really, really dangerous, alright? You guys shouldn’t go there! Why? Well, uh… shit, I don’t want to reveal the answer yet. We still have a few more weeks to go, so, um… quick, bus driver! Come up with a distraction!

VROOM VROOM!! She doesn’t actually want him to stop. If he did, she’d have to answer some questions.

— Sweet tunneling action.

— Again, Mitsumune sees Tokimune. As for Speedstar…

…I’m guessing he left a lover behind on the Titanic.

— The tunnel is like what? A metaphor for something, probably. There’s gotta be a reason why you see your deepest, darkest fears in the tunnel. The “monsters” are a deterrence. But at the same time, Masaki claims it’s even more dangerous to reach the other side. W…what if the monsters are actually trying to protect us this entire time?!!@!!

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— Eventually, the bus driver sees his daughter in the rear view mirror. Why? Who knows? But more importantly, it gives him a convenient excuse to stop the bus at the right spot: the other end of the tunnel.

— So uh… where are we? What are those mounds? Oh, I know… they’re the mounds of salt I have for this anime.

— When the kids check back on the bus driver, he’s gone. He probably got whisked away by the same magical forces that brought him to the bus in the first place. Speaking of which, last week, people — myself included — wondered how the driver got the bus back to the village in the first place. Well, don’t think about it too hard. This isn’t a show where everything is supposed to make logical sense. I mean, that’s pretty obvious from just the dumb characters alone. Don’t get me wrong, though. I’m not defending Mayoiga because I suddenly like it or anything. But let’s be fair; how the bus magically got back up a cliff is the least of our concerns.

— Speedstar is like, “Fuck it. Let’s explore the place.” I agree. What have we got to lose? I lose nothing. I’m just an anime-blogging dork. Go. Risk your lives for my entertainment.

— Masaki comes back again with the whole, “You mustn’t!” Okay, why not? Well, um… about that…

Immediately after he says this, the anime cuts to a bunch of losers back at the village. If you’re still expecting an answer to sensible questions, then you’re watching the wrong anime. This is Mayoiga, which probably means blue balls in Japanese. I’m certain of it. I’m an expert on nee-hawn-gou.

— The guys back at the village grab some sharpened bamboo sticks, because Mikage intends to look for Masaki, I think. But like one of them says, “Man, who cares at this point?”

— After that short intermission with Mikage and a bunch of fuckers I don’t know the names of, we come right back to Masaki and company. Notice how we’ve conveniently bypassed the whole “What is so dangerous about this foggy place?!” line of questioning. Nice.

— Instead, we’re examining a rock:

What does it mean? Well, uh…

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Maybe we have to accept Red XIII, our lord and savior, into our hearts.

— Another village, huh? Is this Nightmare Nanaki Village? Or is it some sort of recursive dream space?

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— Isn’t this what a lot of girls hear everyday already? But what if Masaki just has resting-glum-face syndrome?

— At one point, Masaki excuses herself to use the restroom. Uh-huh. Nevertheless, Mitsumune volunteers to go with her. And they say chivalry is dead. Yeah, Masaki goes off alone, and that’s the last you see of her in this week’s episode. What is she so worried about? Where is she going? I know she probably doesn’t care too much about Speedstar, but is she just gonna leave Mitsumune here?

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— Well, I guess it’s time we learn a thing or two about Speedstar. Something something abuse, something something scary grandma in an attic. TL;DR: his parents used him like a puppet, so he wants Mitsumune to be his puppet. Wait, ew, Rose is his grandma? Sick, dude.

— It’s most likely a typo, but I’m sticking with it: TURDONERD.

— Mitsumune runs away from Puppetmaster Speedstar, and along the way, he finds Masaki’s ribbon. Excellent. Now he’s immune to all status effects.

— He also bumps into Valkana, who, if you’ll recall, had gone off on his own to chase after the mysterious assailant. Somehow, that took him through the tunnel… did he notice the bus on the way here, or did the bus already disappear by this point?

— Both Valkana and Mitsumune start to see their respective monsters. For Valkana, it’s some tentacle monster. Nah, it’s apparently the wood pattern he was staring at when he got fired. These monsters are getting lamer and lamer by the week, but again, if you ask Mayoiga’s most ardent defenders, this is purposeful. Masterful. Nothing more amusing than a lame-ass, wood-patterned Vel’koz.

— Meanwhile, Mitsumune’s penguin dives off a cliff, and our hero follows suit. Is he no longer scared? Of course not. He got the ribbon, remember?

— He hears his mother’s voice calling for Tokimune across a shallow body of water, so he walks slowly towards it. Why?

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— Back to Valkana for a bit, he resolves to stay in Nanaki Village despite everything. Sounds like he already accepts Nanaki, our lord and savior.

— Finally, we pay Lion, Maimai and Nanko a visit. No, I didn’t actually remember their names. I looked it up. Thank god for Wikipedia.

— Nanko has a new hypothesis to test: maybe the monsters will disappear if you can just gat over your deepest, darkest fears. She says this as she pinches one of her love handles. I wonder what her monster looks like. Maybe some kobe beef. In any case, it seems to her that Maimai isn’t so hung up on her past anymore, so why don’t we visit the tunnel again? Let’s see if the giant Mitsumune returns! Maimai’s not too thrilled at the prospect of being a guinea pig, but hey, we’re all consenting adults. What’s the harm in us girls experimenting a bit?

— But before the trio can do anything, arrows come flying out of the woods again.

Oh hey, it’s Jack. How ya been, buddy? Saw you in the woods a few weeks ago. What were you doing out there? Y’know, I’m expecting to see Yottsun at any moment now.

Hey, you’re not Yottsun. In fact, who are you?

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— As for Mitsumune, he wakes up to find himself in a bed… within some well-lit room… maybe a hospital room. Is he gonna see himself as Tokimune again?

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Final Word

Shrug. Anyway, tune in next week for none of the answers that you’re looking for, and even more questions. After all, it won’t be the finale, so we can’t go spoiling the story just yet! Woo! And no Lovepon this week! Double woo!