Now it’s Licht’s turn to be victimized.

— When Licht wakes up, he finds himself in an endless expanse of human skulls. Just human skulls, though. No other bony structure. Doan’s “black hole” tears everything up but human skulls. Just accept it. You must also accept the fact that this scene looks like a shitty version of Berserk‘s eclipse event.

— Doan doesn’t really matter. He’s not even the final boss. What Licht has to do is confront himself. As a result, he finds himself taunted by masks. They’re trying to make him give up and quit on life. It’s weird to have this conversation now, though. After all, Licht went quiet for 300 years. Why didn’t he spend that entire time reflecting on his own sins?

— Plus, like everything else in this series, Licht’s true conflict is as generic as it can get. He initially tries to resist, but he eventually succumbs to his “opponent.” Then outta nowhere, he hears Hina’s voice calling out to him, and as a result, our hero finds the strength to pick himself back up. Yawn.

— Thanks, Webster.

— Back in the real world, Hina continues to believe in Licht. Even Jail has a nice word to say about the hero. Ah, friends coming together.

— So Licht emerges from the “black hole” and goes right back to fighting Doan. He doesn’t want to simply defeat his old partner, though. Rather, he wants to recruit the former high school bully to his cause. After all, they really bonded over murdering a good chunk of the world’s population. Great. If there’s ever a sequel, I’m gonna have to see Doan’s ugly mug again.

— Also, he’s literally a child murderer. I like how Licht just glosses over that fact. Well, y’see, the kid was brainwashed by evil people to kill me, so Doan just had to do what he had to do! There were no other options! There’s no possible way two super powerful Aces could stop a kid with a knife without murdering him!

— Doan eats a punch, then just decides to walk away. He won’t join Licht… yet. But he will give back the Ballot that he stole from Hina, ’cause… I dunno… maybe he actually thinks Licht has a ghost of a chance at saving the world?

— So the episode isn’t even half over, but all of the fighting is over. Yep, Doan was the last boss. For this season, anyways. Isn’t that a letdown? Schmelman is just chilling some church out there.

— When Lynn wakes up, she finds herself in just her underwear. They had all sorts of medical equipment that they needed to save her life, but a hospital gown is too much to ask for. Plus, if you’re gonna go this route, you might as well just make her go topless. Nobody keeps their goddamn bra on when they go into surgery. If you’re gonna give me fanservice, at least have it make sense.

— Lynn thinks her confession to Licht was a dream. After all, why would the villagers from Homhough be there? Y’know, I asked the same damn question!

— But not only were they out in the middle of nowhere that night, they’re also here to visit Lynn. Why? Beats me. As you can see, however, that mother never leaves her baby at home.

— Even when they rush off to beat Licht’s ass for rejecting Lynn, the baby comes along. Hell, that baby is pissed. It wants in on that ass-beating.

— Elsewhere, we see Jail get quite saucy with Nana. I guess since both Nana and Lynn lost out to Hina, they will just have to settle with their backups.

— We quickly learn that the villagers practically violated Licht. He’s an Ace too, so he could’ve stopped it if he wanted to. But no, he let someone shit on his head.

— Pele then goes and confront Licht about how the latter knows all about his secret identity. Apparently, he gave himself up episodes and episodes ago. No matter, though. As long as Pele continues to worship the ground that Lynn walks on, Licht will continue trusting him. Great.

— With that out of the way, Pele goes to pay Lynn a visit. Along the way, he gets some really questionable advice…

— …which he seems more than happy to follow.

— But like they always say, at least buy the poor girl dinner first! Or in this case, make it.

— Even though Pele already confessed his feelings to Lynn, he’s all shy about it now. When she asks if he’s one of the people she could date in Homhough, he decides to neg her instead. Why? Because he’s a stupid dumbass. I dunno, what do you want from me?

— Lynn then goes, “Oh, Sergeant Pele, I didn’t think you’d be so good at cooking. You’d actually prevent women from wanting to marry you?” What? A guy who knows how to cook is like one of the easiest ways to impress a girl. Did the near-death experience destroy her brain?

— Finally, we get to the main couple. Hina is still as horny as ever. And even though Licht spent most of the series perving on girls, he’s now a gigantic prude. He’s like a dumb dog that chases after cars. Now that he’s caught one, he has no fucking clue what to do with it.

— Apparently, Hina’s mother also likes to dole out questionable advice.

— This… sounds kinda rapey. Even in the best case scenario, someone did not have very good sex.

— In fact, it appears as though Hina would’ve raped Licht had she not been cockblocked by the rest of team. But hey, we have important plot matters to discuss.

— There’s nothing too complicated here. Licht simply tells everyone that he’s going after all of the Original Ballots. Initially, he intended to bring Alcia down, but he’ll now do it with a twist! He wants to get rid of the Althing so that humanity can go back to controlling their own fates. Yeah, yeah, yeah, real original.

— Meanwhile, Schmelman is still just chilling in his church, but he still has surprises in store for Licht. We’ve been told that everyone else in Class 1A had committed suicide. Well, maybe our evil mastermind went and revived them from the dead.

— Still, Plunderer is over for now, so let’s just end on a happy note.

— Phew, even for a shounen, this show was lazy. But would I blog a sequel? It depends. This season, I didn’t really have anything else to blog on Wednesdays. If the same thing happens again with the sequel, then sure. It’s like fodder.

Let’s put a bow on this season.

— The first season ended with Kaguya sneaking out of her mansion in order to do something that any normal teenager could do: see the fireworks with her friends (though she ended up staring at Miyuki the whole time). It’s thus only fitting that the second season ends in a similar fashion.

— So what’s the problem now? Well, Kaguya still has her ancient flip phone from a bygone era. Nevertheless, she cherishes it because it contains pictures of precious moments — they’re so precious that she really should’ve backed up her data…

— Miyuki sure has a lot of patience, ’cause I don’t think I could work in a room this noisy.

— The principal shows up with a camera, because he wants photos of the student council for the yearbook. Kaguya has to sit out, however, because her family won’t allow her face to appear in any public photos. There are a lot of things I could say about that, but it would just disappear into the ether. It’s not like her family is real and can therefore be reasoned with. I guess I just feel like it doesn’t even make sense to let her become a vice president if they’re so concerned with her public image. Hell, I’m surprised they didn’t just force her to go to a girls-only school.

— Ah yes, every old man in anime is kinda skeazy.

— A small change can go a long way.

— Meanwhile, these two dorks…

— The principal tries to push Kaguya’s buttons by having Miyuki and Chika pose as if they’re a couple, but can you imagine the latter getting into a lovey-dovey relationship? I bet the series ends with her being the odd one out. She’ll probably go enjoy a bowl of ramen while everyone else hooks up.

— When it seems as though Kaguya’s ire is about to rain down on the principal, he quickly does an about-face. And since the girl is so easy to placate, all of that anger she had previously held just goes poof into the air. I wonder if he knows something about these two. I mean, it’s kinda like the worst kept secret.

— Towards the end of the day, Miyuki suggests that they all take private group pictures so that Kaguya can feel included. Unfortunately, when the girl tries to hand her flip phone over to the principal, a gust of wind ’causes her to drop it. A gust of wind, man. Then it somehow bounces off of the ground and over the railing. By the time it hits the ground, it is utterly demolished. Amazing, isn’t it?

— The sad part is that the phone is so old, it can’t be repaired. Even worse, the data can’t be extracted (I wonder about that, but whatever). This means that all of her… um, precious photos are gone. Kaguya is so forlorn that she doesn’t even react to Ai’s teasing when they go and buy a new phone.

— Still, our heroine tries to put a positive spin on things. With a new phone, she can finally start using modern social media apps that secretly spy on us and sell our data to other companies. Hey, I’m just sayin’…

— It’s interesting how Miyuki is the last person to notice that Kaguya is feeling down, but he does quickly realize why his partner is bummed. The others, however, are just making blind stabs in the dark. For example, Chika thinks that maybe her friend has a stomach flu. On the other hand, Yu projects by suggesting that maybe Kaguya stayed up late playing games. I can’t picture Kaguya with a Switch in her hands. C’mon, she just lost her old phone. Is it really only obvious to Miyuki?

— In the end, it’s up to Miyuki to solve the problem, so he organizes a group chat for the entire student council. Apparently, he’s been holding off on this just for Kaguya’s sake. As a result, everyone starts sharing photos.

— Kaguya ends up with more photos than she previously had on her old phone. Unfortunately, Miyuki wusses out and didn’t share everything in his possession. Boo this man. Booooo.

— So yeah, Kaguya gets to act more and more like a normal teenager with every passing day… but compared to last season’s fireworks, this climax gets a meh from me. I mean, it’s a cute story, but not really a climactic way to end a season.

— There’s actually another short story right afterwards to cap off the season, but I really don’t have anything to say about it. Basically, the kids play a game in which they each try to pump up a balloon. The person who makes it burst is obviously the loser. For some reason, however, the balloon ends up destroying the school, and this somehow segues into our main couple staring into each other’s eyes. Um, alright… I guess we got a non-canon story to fill up some time?

— We’re one step closer to these two confessing their love to each other, but still so far, far away. A third season might eventually show up in about a year (i.e. the same amount of time between the first and second season), but even then, I don’t think we’ll reach that pivotal point.

Not exactly the ending that I was hoping for.

— Clair and Shuichi call the team together, but they’re barely a team anymore. Only Chihiro and Yota bother to show up. One bad day in the woods and they’re pretty much done. I guess I can’t really blame them. They’re normal kids; they’re neither physically nor mentally equipped to play heroes. And this is exactly why Clair wants the rest of the group to hand over their coins.

— Chihiro is very heavily invested in Shuichi despite only having met him once. More specifically, she insists that he’s a kind person who shouldn’t fight either. Why? What did Elena tell her about Shuichi? How come Shuichi is not allowed to fight with the rest of his old friend group? Why is he the odd one out? Well, the story isn’t ready to give us the answers to those questions just yet, which is a bummer.

— Later that day, Clair wants to come over to Shuichi’s home, but he is hesitant about it. As a result, she threatens to put an expiration date on their relationship. This leads to him embracing her and saying how he’ll do anything to protect her. Hm. I dunno, I’m a bit puzzled as to why he’s so attached to her. My best guess is that she reminds him of her sister, whom he actually has a deeper relationship with. As for Clair herself, I really don’t know. He saved her, then she saved him. Sure, you’re always grateful when someone protects you, but lately, he’s been acting like she’s his eternal life partner or something.

— When Clair finally gets to Shuichi’s home, she finds it full of dust and cobwebs. The potted plants have long died. Nevertheless, Shuichi acts as if everything is normal. He claims that his parents simply work late into the night, but it’s obvious that he hasn’t actually seen them for a long time. Elena didn’t just erase his memories; she’s messed with his perception of reality.

— Still, I don’t really like this sort of plot twist. I mean, how has Shuichi survived on his own for so long? If his parents are long dead, who’s paying for the food? Who’s paying to keep the lights and water running? Wouldn’t his school have tried to arrange parent-teacher conferences? Wouldn’t one of their relatives have tried to get in contact with them? Wouldn’t the neighbors have said anything? But whatever, just pretend that these issues don’t exist so we can move on with the rest of the story.

— Clair feels guilty, because Shuichi’s life has been ruined thanks to her and her sister. As a result, she starts giving off some weird scent. As soon as Shuichi catches a whiff of it, he suddenly flips and tears off her shirt. Um, I guess he gets horny off of sadness. Before anything can happen between the two of them, however, he starts recovering his past memories.

— Immediately afterwards, they get a call from Sayaka. She tells them that she’s releasing everyone from their bonds, and more importantly, the group will hand over the coins in their possession. That’s only what she says, though. It’s clear that Chihiro is calling the shots this time, and she has no intention of letting Shuichi continue going after the coins. Why is she so insistent on him staying on the side lines? Well, we’re about to get a partial answer to that question.

— The story cuts to Naoto and Elena discussing recent events. At the start of the episode, Honoka’s apparition appeared before one of Aiko’s old classmates and killed her. Apparently, Elena could’ve saved said classmate by erasing her memories much like what she had done to Shuichi, but she held back. Naoto continues by saying that if Shuichi recalls his past, then the world will end. What…? You’re gonna drop this on me now? But why only Shuichi? How come Naoto and Elena can continue fighting and not him? Sadly, they’re not gonna explain that. Clearly, last week’s extended flashback isn’t the whole story. After all, Shuichi felt somewhat peripheral to the original conflict. He didn’t really have much to do with the whole Aiko-Honoka-Kaito debacle. But something obviously happened afterwards that we just didn’t get to see.

— The next day, we see Chihiro hand a bag of coins over to Elena just as she had planned. She never had any intention to give those coins to Clair and Shuichi. Speaking of the latter, he wasn’t supposed to show up, but Yota had told him the actual location anyway. Meanwhile, Clair is lagging behind, but she actually gets a hand from Nana of all people. The latter isn’t important to this story at all, but apparently, she likes Shuichi so she’s going to help Clair out even at her own expense. Um, alright. Whatever. I don’t really know what to say about her, because again, she just isn’t important to this story. Maybe the author has big plans for her down the road.

— Shuichi starts confronting Elena over his memory loss. Apparently, Honoka had killed his parents, and Elena had to erase his memories in order to protect him. He tells her, however, that he no longer wanted to be protected. That’s all fine and dandy, but he and Clair are no match for Elena. And if they can’t even beat her, what chance do they have against Kaito? Maybe if they could become one like he did with Chihiro, it’d be another story. Nevertheless, Clair always insists that the two of them complete each other. Well, something’s missing. Maybe someone is still holding back. Maybe someone isn’t being entirely honest with themselves. But who?

— And now that he’s slowly starting to remember their shared past, Honoka suddenly shows up to attack him. So we get some answers, but this only raises more questions. Why does Honoka immediately go for Shuichi? How come Naoto and Elena are spared? Were his parents somehow involved in Aiko’s bullying and subsequent suicide? In any case, Shuichi has ironically been saying over and over that he isn’t the main character of this story, but he remains the most important character nonetheless. No one, however, will say why he’s so important even though this adaptation is about to end any minute now.

— I’m not exactly sure what happens next, but it looks as though Honoka is invading his mind? And try as he might, he can’t stop her. As a result, Elena ends up having to use her powers to seal his memories once more. This spares him from Honoka’s assault… but it doesn’t actually solve anything. It’s just a semi-reset button.

— After all, Shuichi still insists that he and Clair are going to end this “game.” If he managed to regain his memories once, he surely can do it again. It’s painfully obvious that Elena’s powers are not foolproof. Nevertheless, she proceeds to walk away from him and Clair after replying that she and Naoto will end the game. It just doesn’t make sense to me. If Shuichi regaining his memories can cause the world to end, then shouldn’t Elena do more to prevent him from participating? He’s not going to give up, and she should know that. And if he keeps pushing forward, then he’ll likely recover his memories again.

— The next day, Clair and Shuichi meet up with Tadanori, because the two of them are not gonna give up. As expected, they’re going to head deep into the woods and try to find the crash site. But for us, this anime adaptation is over. Obviously, I knew that the story wouldn’t be wrapped up in just thirteen episodes, but I was hoping for a bit more closure than we just got.

— Maybe we’ll get a sequel at some point, but I wouldn’t get my hopes up. I haven’t touched the manga, but I did take a look at its progress. Unfortunately, it isn’t very far along at all. There certainly isn’t enough material for a second season. So yeah, this is one of those series that isn’t really that good, but you still wanna know what happens next. But as always, you’re gonna get blue-balled because the story is nowhere close to being finished. And that’s the biggest bummer.

Tongue-in-cheek or not, people keep trying to come up with asinine reasons for why the birth rate is declining. In this show, babies aren’t being made because aliens from outer space are stealing our libido. As a result, no one wants to have sex and thus have babies. But I mean, that’s not actually true, huh? People’s libidos haven’t really disappeared; we’re still as horny as ever. A lot of folks, however, simply feel that sex isn’t worth all of the complication that it entails. There are just so many ways to get an orgasm these days — ways that don’t require putting yourself out there and engaging in one-on-one relations with another living, breathing person. In fact, I think it would be interesting to see a show that tries to persuade us that an orgasm from sex is superior to the one you can get from masturbation… but I digress. After all, this is not what this show is about, so let’s just pretend that… yes, aliens are stealing our libido.

So in this destined-to-be-generic harem anime, our hero Ret has a childhood friend who matured a bit earlier than him. Kirara wanted to do all sorts of lewd things like hold hands! Ugh, what a whore! The two kids, however, were soon attacked by one of those libido-stealing aliens. The girl valiantly tried to defend her friend, and as a result, we are led to assume that her… um, “H energy” was stolen. Since then, Ret’s childhood friend has completely changed. She hates boys so much that she won’t touch anything they’ve touched. Kirara literally wears gloves because, like, boys are just so gross. Nevertheless, Ret endures. Despite her treating him with complete disdain, he sticks around in hopes that the old Kirara might return one day. And even if she doesn’t, he assures her that he won’t treat her any differently.

You know how Batman was forever shaped by seeing his parents killed before his very eyes? Well, Ret has also been shaped by his childhood friend turning frigid. Thanks to that fateful day, he’s become superhero who battles aliens. But whereas Batman has a suit, our hero completely loses his clothes whenever he has to fight evil. Ah well… dems the breaks. Unfortunately, the alien he thought he defeated quickly comes back. And this time, he’s all out of energy. It’s been a day, though. If a young man needs more time to get it up, maybe he should see a doctor. To make matters even worse, Kirara is with him this time. Unable to fight back, Ret grabs Kirara’s hand and leads her to a hiding place. They thus end up in the exact same playground from their past, ’cause y’know, a good story is like poetry; it rhymes.

Now that Kirara is forced to hold Ret’s hand, her frigid heart starts to melt again. In fact, it’s being engulfed by H energy. All those repressed feelings and memories are roaring back with a vengeance. Just from holding hands. Hands, man. Hands. And even though the alien has now grown to gargantuan sizes from absorbing other people’s H energy, Kirara’s energy rejuvenates Ret so much that the couple proceeds to completely destroy their energy in one shot. We soon learn that Kirara’s enormous libido was never completely stolen. In fact, the twist is that it couldn’t be stolen. The alien from their past kept trying to steal all of her H energy, but she had too much of it. This made the girl self-conscious, and that’s why she changed. Oh ho ho ho… the girl is truly the horn…y one… which we already knew from the opening? I dunno, it’s kind of a lame twist if you ask me. I can’t help but think of that awkward scene in Lost in Translation where a woman pretended as though she was being ravaged against her will. That’s just how it is in some places, though. Women can’t want sex; sex has to conquer them.

And with the episode coming to an end, here comes the rest of the harem… even though it’s honestly kind of pointless, ’cause Ret comes out and admits right off the bat that he’s in love with Kirara. But whatever, let’s go through this song-and-dance routine for the kids, ’cause having one girl is never enough for some reason. Naturally, Ret and the girls all have to live together, ’cause… I dunno, harem anime has to do harem things. In any case, Kirara will undoubtedly join Ret in his quest to rid the world of these dastardly aliens, but she’ll probably have to take a backseat for now. After all, we’ve got other girls to get to know. Gotta stick to the formula. And that’s our premise. Kinda boring, isn’t it? I mean, it’s nothing we haven’t seen before. It’s the same ol’ ecchi gags, the same ol’ bouncy boobs, the same ol’ childhood friend story.

I’m trying to imagine what I’d rather watch. Maybe a comedy built on cringe humor. Maybe an earnest show about an awkward 30-year-old virgin who has only known the touch of his right hand, but he’s now trying to break out of his shell and become intimate with actual people. And along the way, we get to see his various mishaps. Well, that wouldn’t work. That’s too adult. After all, this show is adapted from a manga that originated in Jump Square; it’s literally for kids.

First up is Maou Gakuin no Futekigousha. This is one of those shows where the main character is overpowered right out of the gate. Why is Anos Voldigoad so strong? Because he is the reincarnation of the infamous demon king from 2,000 years ago. So basically, we get to watch him steamroll over everyone in this episode without breaking a sweat. At one point, he kills a guy by snapping his fingers, then brings the guy back to life just to kill him again. Clearly, our demon lord is not very gentle. Maybe if a hero from 2,000 years ago has also reincarnated (or is perhaps still alive for some reason), Anos might need to put in a little more effort. But for now, the real challenge isn’t on the battlefield. Rather, the real challenge is with his interpersonal relationships. Our protagonist is very dismayed to see that his own descendants have allowed the bonds between them to deteriorate. Even family members aren’t very close anymore. And like almost every anime that has ever featured an academy, we have the same tired class conflict. So yeah, Anos’ll have to do something about that. Maybe organize some team bonding exercises. Y’know, sit around the campfire and roasts some marshmallows. Unfortunately, the very school he founded 2000 years ago has gone and deemed him a Misfit… whatever that means.

Yeah, this was a pretty boring episode. There must be people who love this shit. After all, someone is buying these light novels. Someone then has to look at the sales numbers for said light novels and proceed to greenlight these insipid anime adaptations. But it’s just not for me. I couldn’t help but yawn throughout the episode. The only time I found myself somewhat amused by the story was when Anos’s family revealed that he is only one month old. His mother gave birth to him just a short while ago, and he has rapidly aged into a healthy teenage boy. But why stop there? Why not continue aging? Because high school, duh. We can’t go to school if we’re an adult. We can’t hit on teenage girls if we’re an adult (who, by the way, displays almost no personality whatsoever in this episode). We can’t beat up mean ol’ school bullies as an adult. And just like that, any inkling of interest I might have had has quickly dissipated. All I can do is make up my own canon. I like to believe that Mahouka S2 was delayed, because Tatsuya got intimidated by Anos. Between two overpowered dorks, one has to be superior, right? And poor emotionless Tatsuya wouldn’t want the reincarnated demon lord to steal his sister away. But the real culprit is probably the coronavirus. Even Mr. Taurus Silver can’t stop a pandemic.

Fire Force S2 Ep. 1

So I’m not really gonna talk about the first episode, because the truth is that I don’t have much to say about it. Since it is the first episode of a new season, it does the customary shounen thing, i.e. reintroduce everyone and their powers. As a result, a giant Inferno attacks the city, and it can only be brought down by having each member of the team perform their role. He can do this, she can do that, then that guy over there does this, so on and so forth. Whatever. Then afterwards, we have a goofy subplot where the men in the 8th have to pose for a nude photo, because that’s just what firefighters do. But hey, if you need something to chase all of the Tamaki fanservice, here’s some anime man-meat for your pleasure.

I guess I should talk about how I got into this series. I saw that the second season was gonna air in the summer, so I decided on a whim to get myself caught up so I would have yet another potential show to blog about. The problem is that I “watched” the first season while going through the postgame grind in Xenoblade Chronicles DE. I also “watched” the dub because it meant I didn’t have to keep my eyeball on the show 100% of the time. Needless to say, I didn’t really get the authentic Fire Force experience. Hey, I just gotta put that disclaimer out there. I won’t claim to be a Fire Force expert by any means. So what are my general impressions of the first season? Well, first off, I felt that the characters were wholly unremarkable. I don’t think anyone really stood out to me other than Arthur’s somewhat Don Quixote-ish personality. Then we have Tamaki, who is apparently a walking lewd machine. I kinda feel sorry for her, but apparently, she finished second in the character popularity poll. Oh well. As for everyone else? Kinda forgettable.

The only thing that really piques my interest — the sole factor in convincing to keep going — is what I learned through wiki-diving. Yeah, yeah, I encountered spoilers as a result of doing this, but without the proper context for said spoilers, they’re meaningless to me anyways. Oooh, Shinra hits Iris at one point. What could this mean? Well, as of now, it means nothing to me. But enough about that. Let’s get back to the one thing about the story that is somewhat interesting to me. So there’s just this twisted, hellish-looking dimension full of doppelgangers? And people turn into these demonic Infernos whenever said doppelgangers try to encroach on the real world? And maybe the Evangelist wants to replace Earth with this alternate dimension? That’s sort of interesting. I kinda want to see where this goes. And to be fair, watching Shinra’s mother forcibly shift her horns down to cover her eyes was a pretty cool moment. Ah, but there’s the rub.

At its core, this is still a shounen series full of high adrenaline battle scenes. This is also a story about Shinra finding his new family (the 8th), recovering his old family (saving Sho and possibly his mother if she’s still out there somewhere), and coming into his own as a super hero. And who knows? Maybe we’ll tease a multiple possible romances along the way to fan the shipper wars. And all of that would be fine if this was my first shounen series. But instead, I just see this tasty morsel dangling in front of me (the whole Adolla stuff) that I can’t reach — not without wading through all the typical shounen plot developments. Like it or not, I’m gonna have to pretend to give a shit about generic shounen hero number 395493 if I want to see the rest of the story. Plus, the mystery surrounding the Evangelist might be intriguing, but the rest of the White-Clad goons are kinda lame.

I started paying more and more attention to the show as season one reached its climax, and I couldn’t help but chuckle as the trip into the netherworld predictably played itself out. The group gets split up (of course), so we get to watch everyone take their turns overcoming an opponent on their own. This ultimately leads up to the main character’s showdown against the designated villain of the arc. It’s such a shounen thing. It really is. I couldn’t help but be reminded of how all of the good guys in My Hero Academia also got split up during the Shie Hassaikai Raid. You get one episode. Now you get an episode. Okay, now it’s your turn! Then when it’s finally time for Shinra to shine, let’s make it a multi-episode affair! It just felt like yet another example of these series playing it safe. Sure, the formula works, but it’s so stale.

But who knows? Maybe now that I have to consume the show in bite-size chunks instead of one long marathon, maybe I’ll naturally become more invested in the cast and their personal stories.

Time for another feels trip, folks. The problem, however, is that everyone is bummed out in this week’s episode. There’s no focal point. Instead, we just jump from one sad child to another. When I hear someone’s story, I try to put myself in their shoes. I try to imagine what it must feel like to be them, what thoughts might run through their head, what solutions they might come up with. It’s a process. Maybe it’s a flawed process. After all, I’m trying to take something so emotionally subjective and break it down logically. I’m not allowing myself to just feel… I can’t feel unless I go through this process of mine. So when Fruits Basket throws one sad child after another at me — all within a 24 minute episode — my process can’t keep up.

Hm, Tohru’s grandfather just strained his back, so now he’s bedridden. I’m sure she’s worried about his health. Not only that, he kinda represents one of the few living connections she has left to her late par–… oh wait, Kyo has apparently been distancing himself from everyone ever since he met up with Kagura. I doubt he has second thoughts about rejecting her, but now that he has no other distractions, his thoughts must be focused solely o–… Hatsuharu is slowly starting to give up on winning Rin back. The longer they stay broken up, the more likely he’ll accept that she truly doesn’t care about him anymo–… Yuki feels as though he has to get his ducks in a row before he can move on, which means going back and confronting his moth–… ah, Kagura is here, and maybe she knows what’s going on with Ky–… nope, gotta deal with Rin before she escapes again!

Ahhhh, this is maddening! I just end up feeling… emotionally numb, I suppose. It’s like I don’t know who I’m supposed to empathize with. All of them, I guess. But I can’t emotionally digest all of their stories in such a short amount of time. It’s like trying to plug a leaky boat. As soon as you solve one problem, another problem comes up.

Towards the end of the episode, a visit with Tohru’s grandfather triggers a sad memory she thought she had long buried away. So I start thinking about the parallels between her late mother and her grandfather. When she was alive, Kyoko once wished she could see her late husband again. Tohru naturally cried when she saw that her mother was sad. Moreover, the only way Kyoko could see her husband again was to abandon her daughter and die. What can a child do but try to hold onto her mother? So what does she hear from her grandfather now? Well, he starts off by fondly reminiscing over Kyoko and Katsura’s relationship. He eventually wishes that he could just see them once more. The old man isn’t suicidal, but we all know what his wish implies. If he wants to see them again, he’ll have to pass on from this mortal coil. He can only see them in the afterlife. And that’s the thing! No one would ever say this out loud, but we obviously think about it. We think about how old he’s become. We think about the years he has left. We just don’t say any of this out loud. Thinking about his late son and daughter-in-law is an indirect way of looking over his life and confronting his mortality. And Tohru surfacing an old memory is an indirect way of realizing that her grandfather may also abandon her one day.

So here I am, stewing on this when Kyo suddenly shows up. For the first time all episode, he’s not wearing a frown on his face. After all, Tohru has collapsed in the middle of the street, so he has to have both the physical and emotional strength in order to pick her up and put her back on her feet. This relates to how Yuki and Rin both feel as though they don’t have the strength to go forward on their own. Obviously, there’s no shame in accepting other people’s help, but the headstrong Rin doesn’t agree. Maybe she feels that she can’t protect Haru if she can’t protect herself. But I digress. Did Kyo work out his issues offscreen? Probably not completely. He’s one of those people who has to accept other people’s help as well. But for the moment, he needs to be there for Tohru, and the fact that he no longer seems to be down in the dumps is enough of a pick-me-up that it distracts Tohru from her worries over her grandfather. But that’s the best I’ve got.

I kinda focused my empathy process on Tohru and Tohru alone this week, because she’s the character I know best. I still haven’t really wrapped my head around Rin and her worries, because it has yet to become the focal point of any singular episode or story arc. Plus, she doesn’t do herself any favors by pushing everyone away. Obviously, she’s putting up barriers, but in doing so, she seems quite unlikable. On the surface, at least. Honestly, I kinda roll my eyes every time she shows up.

The only other thing I want to say is that I rather like the bond between Haru and Yuki. Haru isn’t afraid to open up to Yuki, and likewise, Yuki isn’t afraid to shed tears in front of Haru. Your mileage may vary, but on a lot of message boards, men seem to express this shared belief that they can’t open up to others without having their own worries used against them. They feel as though it’s a trap. Whether it’s true or not, their SOs often feel disgusted if they open up about their thoughts and concerns. This Reddit thread has a lot of examples. Again, I don’t know if it’s true or not. I don’t have any numbers to support any claim. I just think it’s nice that Haru and Yuki can be vulnerable with each other without any restraint.

Last but not least, Yuki’s face during the big smooch was pretty hilarious.

Man, the first season aired four years ago. I remember not liking it very much. After all, it isn’t really the type of show that appeals to me. Likewise, Subaru isn’t the kind of protagonist that I like to root for. He was a shut-in who consequently never shut up, he was initially super rash and careless, he fell in love with someone even though he barely knew her, so on and so forth. I also dislike love triangles. I doubly dislike the possibility that Subaru may very well end up with both Emilia and Rem when the dust clears. This doesn’t even cover the fact that he already has clingers. What can I say? I like romance, but I’m also a strict monogamist. If it were me, I’d choose the girl who has always been at my side. After all, I value love as an action… but I digress. Last but not least, Re:Zero is a very long story. Even now, the light novels are still being churned out. And we’re up to what? Volume twenty-four? Jesus Christ. And because Re:Zero is so long, its world-building phase is also very long. I remember being very annoyed with some of the slower episodes. The show would only ever pique my interest when (as unfortunate as this sounds) people died. But just as a major arc was about to begin (this was around episode 14 of the first season), I recall that my interest in blogging was beginning to peter out at the time. As a result, I never finished the first season… until literally two days ago.

Luckily, there is no downtime for Subaru this time around, because disaster strikes as soon as season two begins. He had just saved Emilia, but now Rem is in trouble. For some reason, people have forgotten her again. We then cut to the blue-haired maid and Crusch being steam-rolled by two new faces. I guess the latter is supremely confident in her skills, but it always marvels me when anime characters insist on standing their ground and fighting despite the fact that so there are so many unknowns in play. They have no idea whom they’re up against or how powerful these two new villains are (one of them looks like some goofy kid). And considering how much of a struggle it was to defeat Petelgeuse, why underestimate anyone? I’m not saying that either of them could’ve escaped. They probably couldn’t. I think I still would’ve made the token effort, though. I guess I’m “cowardly” compared to these two women, but if there’s even a chance than I can get away to fight another day, I would’ve taken it. Ah well, what’s done is done.

Crusch loses an arm and thus a lot of blood. Nevertheless, she appears to be in perfect physical health later in the episode. Obviously, she’s not okay; she’s now suffering from amnesia, and Felis almost dissolves the alliance as a result. Still, it’s funny to me that losing her arm in battle ended up having no actual consequences whatsoever. Oh well, I just have to assume she was healed by magic. Rem, on the other hand, suffered a much worse fate. Her body is fine, but she has been forgotten from everyone’s mind (except for Subaru’s for some reason that I won’t speculate about). To make matters even worse, she’s now in a coma. Why did Crusch get off so easily by comparison? I dunno, maybe her memories just weren’t as tasty. After all, before Rem’s memories were devoured, she went on and on about how the true hero — her true love!!! — would eventually show up and stop the dastardly villains. You can’t give the bad guys the satisfaction of watching you struggle in vain.

Will I stick with Re:Zero this time? Eh, I can’t predict the future. I can’t even guarantee that I won’t suddenly stop blogging in the middle of the season. But sure, whatever, I’ll give the show a second shot. There’s not a whole lot to blog this season (again), and I’m not very confident that I’ll like the other Wednesday show. I’m happy to take Tuesdays off, but two days off? Ooh, I dunno about that. Plus, it’s probably a good thing that there was such a long gap between the first and second season. Like I said, I vaguely remember being annoyed by Subaru’s characterization, but many of the finer details have been lost to the passage of time. For now, he’s just a broken hero trying to gather himself and push forward (with Emilia’s help). And I’m content to leave it at that. Let’s just see how it plays out from here.

Alright, time for a break before Deca-Dence.

Wednesday’s second show doesn’t exactly blow me away.

— Right off the bat, we get to see our heroine lose her arm. Her father tries to comfort her, but this is the last time that she’ll ever seen him again. C’mon, what are you guys trying to? Send me into a deep depression spiral like The Last of Us?

— You guys dropped something. I wonder how important that something will end up being.

— Basically, humanity has been pushed to the brink by mysterious lifeforms known only as a the Gadolls. The remaining survivors are holed up within these giant, impractical-looking fortresses known as Deca-dences. To tell you the truth, I’m kinda weary of these premises. For once, I just want a story to be like, “This is where they came from and this is why they’re attacking us. Let’s go kick some ass.” Yeah, this spoils the mystery, so… make up another mystery. Give me something new.

— 90% of the world’s population has been wiped out, which still leaves us with hundreds of millions of people. 90% is a large number, but so is the other one. I dunno, I just wouldn’t call it an extinction, which is what one of the main characters keeps saying later in the episode.

— Funny how Gadoll meat looks a whole lot like well-marbled beef. I guess if you can afford it, you can still eat pretty well in the post-apocalyptic world. Maybe that’s where the name of the show came from. The people we see in the episode appear to live shitty lives, but I’m sure someone is living like decadent fat cats. That’s just how the world works.

— Our heroine Natsume is now ready to go out into the world and work for a living. Unfortunately, she isn’t allowed to become a soldier and thus kick some Gadoll ass. Thanks to her prosthetic arm, she is forced to become an armorer instead. Still, her dreams aren’t completely dead yet. They didn’t say yes to her being a soldier, but they didn’t say no either. So you’re saying there’s a chance?

— Our girl faces the usual youth obstacles like mean kids. Ho-hum.

— So… are these guys human? Did I miss something? Why are people purple and teal in this world?

— For now, Natsume finds herself working under Kaburagi, a man of few words. And whenever he does give you a word, it’s rarely a kind one. They say bad bosses can make you hate a job, but our heroine is brimming with energy, so she kinda pushes through it anyway. The only way to counter one headstrong jackass is with another headstrong jackass.

— But despite her optimism, Natsume’s job is far from glamorous. Apparently, armorers have to spend five years cleaning nasty shit off of the Deca-Dence. Why five? Why on earth would you need that much experience to start doing real work? I can only imagine that the story is exaggerating this for effect.

— Fennel, a fellow armorer, instantly makes a move on Natsume. Later in the episode, it is revealed that he has a year left of cleaning duty, so I have to assume that he’s at least four years older than the girl. Well, regardless of the age difference, just walking up to someone and invading their personal space automatically makes you a sleazy jackass in my book. I’m sure he doesn’t see a very many girls in his field of work, but that’s no excuse.

— The safe bet is that Kaburagi ends up becoming the father figure that Natsume needs in order to successfully bridge the gap between childhood and adulthood. Y’know, listen to her rants and give her life advice. My fear, however, is that anime can sometimes go too far. I dropped Arte for a very specific reason in the spring, and I hope I don’t have to do the same again here. In any case, he’s no good at giving life advice at the moment. Kaburagi essentially tells her to just accept her lot in life and give up on her dreams. What kind of father figure is that? Looks like someone needs to have a character arc.

— He’s also a bit shady himself. Nothing wrong with owning a miniature Gadoll as a pet as long as the animal is perfectly tame. But what’s up with him going up to a passed out (or maybe dead) drunkard and drawing something from their blood? What’s this “[t]he world must be rid of bugs” nonsense? Welp, add another mystery to the pile.

— Eventually, a massive horde of Gadolls attack, because we gotta close out the first episode on a bang. They don’t look very fearsome, though. They look like overgrown sea creatures.

— Oh look, Fennel’s a fuck-up on the job as well. Naturally, he ends up surviving while an innocent coworker had to die.

— Death is pretty real in this story, and there’s no shortage of bloodshed. I’m never quite sure how to feel about this sort of thing in anime, though. I mean, on the one hand, you have my fellow humans being slaughtered mercilessly, and yeah, that’s bad. But on the other hand, their enemy is, like, this giant, pink worm thing that almost looks kinda cute. The last thing I feel is fear and certainly not disgust! When it comes to threatening-looking monsters, anime almost never delivers.

— Forced into action, Kaburagi picks up a weapon from a dead soldier and starts dancing through the battlefield as if he never left. He even has a helpless Natsume flailing hopelessly in tow. Impressive, huh? And kinda unbelievable, too. Take a retired NBA player. I’m sure they can still make a 3pt shot. Some muscle memories never fade. But you also can’t drop that same retired NBA player into an actual game and watch him dunk over everybody. At least make him rusty or whatever. But no, Kaburagi is apparently still the Lebron James of kicking Gadoll ass.

— Even Lebron James, however, cannot defeat a Gadoll the size of a mountain. But hey, that’s why we have a Deca-Dence to take care of the big dogs! So what follows is a long and painful sequence of the mobile fortress transforming itself into a weapon capable of defeating the mountain-sized Gadoll. Oh my god, please tell me I don’t have to watch this same sequence in future episodes.

— That UI is tragic.

— After the battle is over, we suddenly cut to… this. Um, what am I looking at? Whatever, just add it to the mystery pile.

— I don’t really want to blog two shows in one day, so I see three possibilities ahead of me. Maybe I’ll get sick of Re:Zero again and drop the second season. I mean, I’ve done it before so I can always do it again! Of course, I can always drop Deca-Dence instead, because honestly, this wasn’t really a home run of a first episode. It’s not bad, but it doesn’t really hook me in either. The goofy-looking Gadolls don’t help. Last but not least, I can always suck it up and just blog both shows. Shrug, we’ll see.

Right off the bat, our protagonist Kazuya gets dumped by Mami, his girlfriend of one whole month. Seriously, they dated for a month. Who falls into such deep despair over a relationship that short? Hell, he should take solace in the fact that her dumping him might have led to the discovery of a cuckhold fetish. That ain’t my thing, but hey, no kink-shaming here. In any case, his vulnerability eventually leads him to spend his dad’s hard-earned money on Chizuru, a rent-a-girlfriend, and right off the bat, he’s like one of those sad sack losers who fall in love with strippers. Yeah, Chizuru is nice to him, but that’s because it’s her job. And when he finally realizes that it’s all an act — an act that he specifically requested and paid for — he suddenly turns nasty. Essentially, Kazuya is too gutless to confront Mami, so he selfishly decides to take his anger out on Chizuru instead. He’s initially even proud of himself. Pathetic, huh? But it’s par for the course with this guy. After all, he’s pretty shallow. He thinks dating Chizuru would be a dream, but he knows nothing about her. He’s just fixated on her physical appearance.

This is where Kazuya and Chizuru’s “relationship” would end if we weren’t in a “zany” romcom. When a customer flips out on you, you probably shouldn’t spend another second with them. Who knows how dangerous they might get! There are creeps everywhere. But when Kazuya has to rush to the hospital because his grandmother fainted, Chizuru strangely decides to tag along. Sure, they still have some time left on the clock, but I’d argue that she’s off the hook if the customer has an emergency and bails on their own volition. What compels her to follow him to the hospital, especially when she knows that her own grandmother is also interned at the same place? Unfortunately, when faced with his parents’ negativity — and to be fair, they’re not exactly wrong — Kazuya can’t help but lie and claim that he’s dating Chizuru. He’d never have this opportunity if she had not come with him. But hey, we wouldn’t have a show if she weren’t in the picture, so the girl then does her job by playing along perfectly. Before you know it, the two of them just keep digging themselves a deeper and deeper hole. Maybe Chizuru’s just that professional. If there’s time left on the clock, then by god, we’re going to keep this farce going until the fat lady sings.

As luck would have it, these two go to the same college (I much prefer her normal, everyday look) and even live in the same apartment complex. In fact, they’re next-door neighbors. Wow, so many coincidences! Obviously, we know how this’ll play out. Kazuya and Chizuru will have to keep this charade up, because nobody wants to disappoint their precious gran-grans. And despite his dreadful start in this opening episode, we’ll eventually learn that Kazuya is probably “not that bad” of a guy. Chizuru will come to realize his good qualities over the course of the series, and maybe she’ll even fall in love with him one day. Maybe. But because this is anime, we might as well make it a harem anime, so there’ll be other girls to distract us along the way. Hell, Mami even comes back in next week’s episode. Since (I believe) this is a one-cour anime, no one will be hooking by the time the show is over, though. Will I nevertheless stick with this show for the rest of the season? Eh, it’s pretty slim pickings this summer. But enough about that. I wanna talk more about the premise instead.

The whole “rent an actor” thing is very real, and I dare say even morally problematic. From fancy sports cars to Louis Vuitton bags, we’ve always paid a premium to project a certain appearance. Treating people as purchasable accessories is just the natural progression of our eternal quest to commodify everything in our everyday life. I once read an interesting interview with a man in this very same industry. In one of his roles, he pretends to be a girl’s father at her mother’s behest:

Morin: How do you handle it when the daughter gets angry or sad?

Yuichi: I never yell, no matter what. That was in the order-form description. The girl was bullied also, if you remember, so her feelings can be very unsettling. There was also a rebellious time, in her teens. She was having difficulties with her mother. When she’s with me, though, she always asks, “Why do you have to leave now?” It’s unpleasant, but it is a reasonable emotion.

…

Morin: Is it possible to avoid the truth forever?

Yuichi: The truth does have to come out eventually. The happiness is not endless, but that doesn’t mean that it’s without value. The child had a father when she needed him most. It might have been a brief period, and she might know the truth now, but she had a meaningful experience at that time.

My initial gut reaction is, of course, horror. Thanks to her mother, this poor child is living a lie. But that’s me projecting my own feelings on a girl whom I will never ever meet. Disgust is how I would feel if I was in her position, but I have no idea how she will react when she eventually learns the truth one day. Maybe she will be as open-minded as he hopes her to be. Maybe she’ll look back on their “father-daughter” moments fondly. I just feel sad, however, that the girl never even had a choice in the matter. If Kazuya wants to fill the empty void in his heart by hiring a rent-a-girlfriend, well, that’s certainly his prerogative. It’s his money (not really), and as an adult, he gets to make his own decisions in life. But a little girl doesn’t get a say when a random man suddenly shows up one day and calls himself her father.

Uzaki Hana bumps into Sakurai Shinichi in college, and at first, nothing comes of it. They’re just former high school classmates saying hi. But during her first year, the girl finds herself observing Shinichi from a distance, and she couldn’t help but notice that he likes to be by his lonesome. As an introvert, I see nothing wrong with the fact that Shinichi enjoys his solitude, but Hana clearly disagrees. When spring rolls around once more, Hana just can’t stand it any longer. She feels compelled to solve a problem that isn’t necessarily there. Why? Well, she insists that being a loner is no fun, but I wonder if it’s really that simple. Maybe she’s lonely herself. I’m sure she has people that she can call friends, but as one can attest, you can have friends and still feel quite lonely. Plus, Hana looks lonely enough in the ED… but I’m probably reading too much into it. After all, this show doesn’t appear to have a whole lot of depth to it.

Essentially, you have a girl teasing the boy, which is a tried-and-tested formula. Remember Karakai Jouzu no Takagi-san? Hell, even Ijiranaide, Nagatoro-san is getting an anime adaptation. And what do these series have in common? They’re all about as deep as a puddle. Girl teases guy, guy initially seems frustrated, but at the end of the day, guy is secretly happy that girl has decided to spend so much goddamn energy to encroach on his life. These series are easy to read and digest, and there’s often no unpleasant aftertaste especially since these characters just aren’t that interesting. The only question that comes to mind is when will these two oblivious idiots admit that they like each other? The only difference with Uzaki-chan wa Asobitai! is that Hana looks like she was focus-tested for her audience’s pleasure. C’mon, how many 4’11” girls do you bump into has a giant rack, wears a shirt that highlights their size, and is yet too innocent to realize that her moans of pleasure on a massage chair might be inappropriate for public consumption?

In any case, I gotta defend fellow loners out there. I think you might miss out on a lot of experiences in life if you always insist on having company by your side. Sure, it’s fun to watch summer blockbusters with friends, but if your buddies don’t enjoy slow dramas like First Cow or uncomfortable horror flicks like Midsommar, what can you do? Just sit tight and wait for the home release? I personally enjoy the theater-going experience, so I’d be missing out on that. Plenty of people might like sushi, but they don’t necessarily want to fork over 100+ dollars for top-flight omakase? Again, what are you gonna do? It’s not like I can order hop onto Doordash or Grubhub and order an omakase to-go. One day, I might save up enough money to travel the world and immerse myself in a completely different culture. If no one can go with me, I’m still gonna go all by my lonesome.

Last but not least, I can’t not hear Satanichia in Hana. Yes, I know they share the same voice actress. Maybe she was directed to copy the same energy since Satanichia is kinda popular, but I wish watching anime didn’t always feel like watching the same characters reincarnated over and over into different universes.

Let’s start with Dokyuu Hentai HxEros. It probably won’t surprise you at all to learn that this is yet another episode where the bad guys are defeated in a single punch. It’s also yet another episode where Ret and Kirara are caught in an embarrassing situation. The problem this week is that Kirara doesn’t want to join the “HxEros” team, because doing so is tantamount to admitting that she has dirty thoughts. Ret is asked to convince her, but he actually tells her it’s okay if she doesn’t join. He wouldn’t want to force her to confront her trauma. It’s a somewhat surprisingly earnest scene. At the end of the day, however, she still joins up with them and finds herself in typical ecchi scenarios, so whatever.

Look, I’ve been thinking, and my conclusion is that we’re looking at this all wrong. And by that, I mean both sides. The problem is that the bad guys keep targeting teenagers, and sure, that makes sense on a fundamental level. At that age, people are rife with sexual curiosity. As such, their “H energy” must be sky high. Still, it’d be a shame if you stole their libido, and this is why Ret and his team are fighting back. But look, there are horny people everywhere. And sometimes, those horny people are evil. I’m talking rapists and pedophiles. The bad guys need “H energy,” and bastards like Epstein and Catholic priests are full of them! It’s a win-win-win! Good, law-abiding citizens keep their libido, the bad guys get their precious energy, and the truly disgusting bad guys are basically neutered!

Maou Gakuin no Futekigousha Ep. 2

This week’s prologue explains what had happened 2,000 years ago. Sick of all the fighting, Anos offered to sacrifice his life in order to build walls between the warring races. Usually, you integrate the races in order to breed peace and understanding, but apparently, these racists just hated each other that much. As a result, the only option was literally “separate but equal” (lol).

As for the rest of the episode, well… you know the drill. People will keep disrespecting Anos, so he’ll just have to put them in their place. This time, however, we are introduced to Sasha Necron, Anos’s second waifu. Not only is she Misha’s sister, she hates the quiet, reserved girl for reasons that will be fully revealed later. For now, just know that Sasha doesn’t even consider Mischa to be human. And when Anos declares himself a team leader despite being a “hybrid mongrel” — seriously, if they have such a disdain for commoners, why even let them enroll at all? — Sasha challenges him to a team match.

There’s not much to say here about the actual match itself. Like in the first episode, nothing can make Anos sweat. He can literally pick up a castle with one hand, spin it like a top, and toss it over them mountains like Uncle Rico. When Sasha tries to use the ultimate fire magic, the reincarnated demon king counters with the weakest fire magic. Naturally, he overpowers her with ease. In the end, Sasha calls uncle and submits like we all predicted she would.

Still, I don’t really understand why everyone in this universe is so willfully blind. Anos is declared a misfit, because they think he’s the furthest thing possible from becoming the next Demon King. After all, it’s been 2,000 years, so the finer details are bound to have faded overtime. Hell, I wouldn’t even put it past certain individuals to twist history for their purposes. After all, Anos doesn’t care whether you’re a pureblood or not, but this tradition might have been put in place for nefarious reasons. But I digress. My point is that action obviously speaks louder than words. At first, you might think Anos is crazy, because he keeps calling himself the Demon King. He must be deluded, one might assume. But after seeing all these crazy feats — like, y’know, picking up a fucking castle — why are there still doubters? Why would the instructors, people tasked with identifying true potential within their students, not recognize greatness before their very eyes? Not once has anyone ever said, “Wow, um, I think this guy might be legit.” So yeah, this part kinda pulls me out of the story.

I still say that the show is only ever entertaining when Anos’s parents are onscreen.

I thought about blogging the latest episode of Fire Force, but after watching it, I found that I didn’t have any thoughts I felt like sharing. Whoops. I’ll still follow the show, but I’ll probably only write about it once in a while.

As for Oregairu, hmm… I’m going to wait for the second episode before I decide whether or not to commit.

Last and very least, I’ll save SAO for Sundays… I’ll probably drop it after a few weeks anyways.

It’s time for parent-teacher conferences, and normally, it’s fun and interesting to see what kids dream of becoming once they get older. Unfortunately, Tohru and her friends don’t seem to have much in the way of aspirations. Arisa, for example, just wants to work… which she’s already doing. Granted, working at a conbini helped her run into the man of her dreams, but c’mon, there’s more to life than that. When pressed, she casually suggests perhaps becoming a model. Needless to say, Arisa doesn’t have any real goals. Saki is even worse; it’s hard to tell if she’s taking this exercise seriously at all. I know it’s supposed to be funny, because ha ha, we’re supporting characters so it’s our job to inject levity into a show that is full of feels, uwu~! Hell, Saki’s kind of a gimmick character. But once you start comparing them to the Somas, you can’t help but be annoyed with their flippant attitude. With Kyo, for example, it’s difficult to entertain the idea of a future career when you’re constantly reminded that you’ll literally be imprisoned as soon as you graduate. All he can really think about at the moment is Tohru. Naturally, Kazuma doesn’t put any pressure on Kyo; he just wants the boy to realize that the future isn’t necessarily set in stone. But this is exactly why Arisa and Saki kinda piss me off this episode. In contrast, they actually have the freedom to dictate their own lives, and they’re completely taking it for granted.

Yuki’s situation is a whole ‘nother can of worms. His mother obviously doesn’t even want to bother with the whole thing. And unlike every other parent or guardian we see in this episode, when she does show up, she completely tries to dictate her son’s future. After all, Yuki doesn’t really mean much to her. She doesn’t see him as his own person. Obviously, this once again triggers Yuki’s feelings of inferiority. A lot of teachers could just sit back and not get involved in family affairs, but Mayuko comes to Yuki’s defense. This only incurs Yuki’s mother’s wrath, but hey, someone has to come to this kid’s defense. And this is where the ball starts rolling. I mean, it should go without saying, but kids need to be nurtured. They’re not supposed to be able to solve their problems without needing support. If they can, great! But that’s not usually how it goes. So of course, Yuki can’t speak up and confront his mother own his own. He needs support. So Mayuko is there for him, but she’s not the only one. Outta nowhere, Ayame shows up, and his ridiculousness is something that his mother can’t handle. Last but not least, Tohru has always been in Yuki’s corner. She plays the supportive mother that he’s never had. Gotta feel bad for Mayuko, though. She had to sit there and watch this family drama play out in front of her.

Finally, I guess I should say a couple things about Tohru. She decided a future for herself a long time ago: she wants to start working to become less of a burden on everyone around her. Selflessness is encoded in her DNA. Moreover, it’s doubly difficult for her to think of the future, because she’s so preoccupied with present concerns. After all, her primary goal right now is to break the Soma curse. You’re not gonna daydream about a career when you have something that large and serious looming over your head. She knows that if she doesn’t do something, everyone will be trapped with Akito. So when she sees Yuki finding the courage to face his mother, it’s as if she’s found a small glimmer of hope. If her meddling here can produce results, then maybe she actually has in breaking the curse. Unlike her friends, she is more serious about her future, and that is precisely why she just wants to work. Still, it makes me sad that she isn’t a tiny bit selfish and thus try to reach for something more. She doesn’t have to get a Ph.D or become a bigwig CEO. But c’mon, you’re still a kid, and kids should be allowed to dream. What’s the point of being a kid if you’re just trying to become a depressing adult as quick as possible? More importantly, kids are allowed to be selfish, so I just wish people like Tohru would put themselves first every now and then.

As a side note, Saki apparently thinks Kazuma is a hottie. Shrug, anime characters all look the same to me.

Doubt.

The story slows down to set the stage for the upcoming conflict, so there isn’t really anything interesting for me to say. If I tried, it’d just be a checklist of plot events, e.g. the villagers haven’t returned from Sanctuary, a former maid is back, Petra is now training to become a maid, Beatrice tells Subaru where he can find answers to many questions, beware of Garfield, meet the new witch, so on and so forth. To be fair, Roswaal is obviously up to something, and he’s always been kinda shady. I guess it’s time for him to show his true intentions. Not only that, Emilia claims that she doesn’t want to hide anything from Subaru, but she’s still holding back by saying that she just can’t find the right words. On both of these fronts, all I can really do is speculate as to what these characters are really thinking. Maybe if I followed season one more closely, I could take a stab in the dark at Emilia’s feelings, but I’m not confident in doing so right now. And with that, I’m just gonna move right onto the next show that aired today…

Deca-Dence

This episode drops a pretty huge bombshell on us: all this pain and suffering is nothing more than a game to the machines. But who or what are the machines? Well, remember those oddly-colored people who confused me just with their presence in last week’s episodes? I initially thought that maybe humans had evolved to have purple skin or whatever. Well, as it turns out they’re Gears, and Gears are not real people; they’re just avatars for these cutesy-looking machines. Apparently, even robots need some form of recreation (why?), but if you really think about it, the idea of virtual reality for machines is kinda silly, isn’t it? So instead, they use real life bodies in order to participate in a real life conflict. The machines actually wanna pretend to be us. Isn’t that cute? Anyways, they simply drop themselves into the middle of the conflict to have some fun and climb the rankings. High scorers are rewarded with oxyone, which apparently doubles as both a feelgood drug and a way to extend these machines’ lifespans.

So now what? What does all of this mean? Well, this week’s episode is all about Kaburagi’s past, and how his life went to shit when he led Mikey, one of his younger teammates, astray. Like in our video games, Gears don’t get hurt when their human-like avatars are damaged. Nevertheless, you can cheat by removing the limiter on said avatars. In doing so, you’ll unlock greater power, but the trade-off is that you’ll now feel pain. Why would machines be programmed to feel pain? Eh, don’t worry about it. The point is that (again) removing your limiter is a cheat, so the system (the Solid Quake corporation?) frowns upon this. And when the kid gets caught, he is summarily fried and scrapped. The rest of the team is then forced to choose between being sent to a correctional facility or carrying out a bug-hunting mission. After seeing what Kaburagi was up to in last week’s episode, we obviously know what he chose. Nevertheless, he was content to let his lifespan eventually expire… until Natsume inadvertently convinces him otherwise.

A lot is still left unexplained. Naturally, we don’t know how the world got like this, and why the machines started enslaving humans for their amusement. We also don’t know what the company or the system is, and why they treat their own kind like disposable objects. The biggest mystery of all, however, is why Natsume is supposed to be dead. She catches Kaburagi doing his shady thing, but she thinks he’s just robbing them. Kaburagi thought the system would process her, but that ends up not happening. Upon a cursory investigation, he discovers that she’s a bug in the system. Maybe that thing that was dropped in last week episode might explain why Natsume is supposed to be dead? Either way, rather than taking care of her like the system would want him to, Kaburagi decides to extend his lifespan in order to train her. In doing so, perhaps he hopes that this little bug can eventually bring down the system and avenge his buddy Mikey.

All I can do right now is shrug. Obviously, as a human, I’m on their side. I hope Natsume can free her own people from Deca-Dence… assuming that this is even the best overall outcome. If bringing down the system doesn’t bring a stop to the Gadolls, then maybe not, y’know? From the limited information that we’ve been given, it doesn’t appear as though humans can survive on their own. On the other hand, however, I need some time to process these twists. I’m not sure if I think they’re stupid or not.

These characters just can’t help themselves.

— Even though Kazuya bumps into Chizuru on campus, he tries to convince himself that it’s not really her. He would’ve just brushed the encounter aside, but the girl goes and confirms her identity to him. She has terrible luck.

— Then of course, they find out that they’re actually next door neighbors. I’m surprised that they are so surprised. After all, even though I don’t actually talk to my next door neighbors, I still know what they look like. And yet, these two have never bumped into each until now?

— Apparently, even obasans can get hooked on these shitty mobile games. Y’know, I tried a few of those gacha games just to see what all the hype was about. Fate Grand Order, Fire Emblem Heroes, Azur Lane, you name it! And not surprisingly, I got bored with every single one of them within half an hour. The gameplay is just so unappealing, and I really have no desire to collect waifus.

— Anyways, Kazuya’s grandmother is dropping by, and she wants to see Chizuru. Um, okay? I mean, that’s kind of demanding. Is your grandson’s girlfriend supposed to drop everything she’s doing just to see you? The old woman didn’t even schedule this ahead of time. Well, maybe that’s on purpose. Maybe she has a hunch that a girl like Chizuru wouldn’t stick with her idiot grandson, so she wants to catch him with his pants down. Nevertheless, it seems rather inconsiderate.

— Kazuya could easily get himself out of this. Easily. But naturally, he tries to beg Chizuru to play the role just one more time, and at first, she refuses. She even gives him a perfectly good excuse: she has to finish a report. So why didn’t he just use that? Why didn’t he just tell his grandmother that his girlfriend, who is also a college student, has work that she needs to get done? What reasonable grandmother wouldn’t buy that?

— But instead, Kazuya sits there uselessly, telling his grandmother that he has no clue when Chizuru will come over. I know it has only been like… one and a quarter episodes, but this guy doesn’t really have any good traits. He’s dumb, shallow, and a proven liar! He’s also hung up on a ex-girlfriend that he only dated for a month.

— Eventually, Kazuya’s grandmother just comes right out and admits that she expected Chizuru to dump him. She then goes on and on about how her grandson is hopeless when it comes to girls, and it makes her so sad that he will never get with someone. Meanwhile, Chizuru is eavesdropping on this conversation (for shame, young woman!), so she starts to feel bad. Since her own grandmother is struggling with health issues, I guess she has a soft spot for obasans in general.

— As a result, she comes over just to make Kazuya’s grandmother happy. But this is stupid, because she and Kazuya keep digging themselves a deeper and deeper hole. She insists that they need to announce their breakup at some point, but that’s yet another lie! It’s like telling someone digging a hole to start digging up. No, you gotta stop digging altogether, stupid!

— Kazuya has to visit his grandmother every Wednesday, and now the old woman expects Chizuru to come with him as well. That’s a little unreasonable, isn’t it? Maybe they do things differently in Japan, but it’s insane to ask your grandson’s new girlfriend to visit you weekly.

— Of course, Chizuru doesn’t have to agree to this, but she does. She’s still getting paid, and money is money. Nevertheless, this situation has the potential to blow up in her face, and yet she presses on. She’s either one of those people who feel the need to mother helpless losers like Kazuya, or she constantly feels the need to help others even at her own expense. Either way, it doesn’t seem healthy.

— Soon after, Kazuya bumps into Mami on campus, and his obsession continues. Then afterwards, he thinks about her legs and almost masturbates over it. If Chizuru didn’t remind him that he needed to see his grandmother, he would’ve jerked off right there and then. Dude, Mami just wasn’t into you. Not only that, they dated for a month! A moooooooonth! Still hung up on someone you dated for over a year? Sure. Hung up on someone whom you’ve shared so many precious memories with? Sure! A month, though? Get help, bro.

— The hole gets deeper and deeper when the “couple” bumps into his friends. Naturally, they don’t actually recognize Chizuru. She’s like Clark Kent, I guess.

— Even Kazuya’s best buds can’t believe for a second that he could date someone like Chizuru. In fact, they think she’s just a scammer out to get their buddy. So again, the girl keeps the lie going. She sees a puppy in danger — and not even a cute, wholesome puppy, mind you — so she just can’t help herself.

— His friends invite him to a drinking party, and even though Chizuru is shaking her head at him, he agrees to it anyway. He could’ve easily said that he and his “girlfriend” already had plans, but he didn’t. Hell, she could’ve done that too. She could’ve just reminded him that they already have dinner reservations or whatever. But neither of them are very good at thinking on their feet, so off to the drinking party we go!

— So of course, Mami is at the party. Kazuya is gross, so he can’t help but ogle his ex-girlfriend in front of his “current girlfriend”. And like every other previous encounters with Mami, he goes and gets an erection. I haven’t heard this guy say one nice thing about Mami’s personality. Apparently, she’s just hot, and that’s what he’s hung up on.

— When he gets back to the drinking party, he finds Mami sitting across from Chizuru. His ex starts rattling off a long list of negative things about him. In her eyes, he’s just a complete loser, and y’know, I really have no reason to doubt anything she says. Kazuya hasn’t exactly painted himself in a very positive light.

— Chizuru has to play the role of a proper girlfriend, so she comes to Kazuya’s defense. But even if she wasn’t a good actor, she probably would’ve spoken up anyways. This episode firmly establishes the fact that the girl is compelled to protect people even if they don’t deserve her kindness.

— Nevertheless, Kazuya isn’t mad at Mami. Instead, he meekly and pathetically tells Chizuru that everything his ex is saying is simply the truth. Mami isn’t even nice to him, and he still likes her. This guy is so thoroughly unpleasant as a protagonist.

— So Chizuru dashes off, because she doesn’t really have any reason to stick around. Plus, they’re way over the time limit for their rent-a-date. Meanwhile, Kazuya is just wallowing in self-pity when Mami suddenly shows up and invites him over to her place. I can’t really imagine what she’s thinking, since I barely know her. But if I had to guess, everyone seems to acknowledge that Chizuru is amazingly beautiful. So maybe it’s a matter of pride. Maybe Mami doesn’t like the fact that her ex-boyfriend got an upgrade.

— In any case, this series has a lot of work cut out for itself if it wants to convince me that Kazuya is actually even remotely dating material. It’s hard to imagine how any girl could fall in love with this guy. Nothing in the past two episodes remotely leads me to think that he can even be a decent boyfriend. Kazuya’s like a middle school kid who just discovered erections for the first time, so he goes around popping boners as soon as a girl shows even an inch of her bare skin.

Let’s just get this over with.

— At the start of the episode, the gang is trying to apprehend a couple of panty thieves. Unfortunately, one manages to get away because Kirara still can’t freely use her powers. Hell, she can’t even hurt a bug. By the way, why are all the villains female? I guess that’s a plot point to be revealed later.

— Back at base, Momoka gets on Kirara’s case, because this is apparently the third time she’s failed out in the field. It turns out that our heroes need to store up “H energy” by constantly having dirty thoughts, and Kirara has been neglecting to do so. Momoka has a quick-fix solution, but unfortunately, Kirara is a bit too sex negative to employ it. You have to wonder why she even decided to join the team if she’s this uncomfortable around sex. I mean, it’s kind of a hard requirement for the job.

— Do people really find that fang thing cute? Like if a real life girl actually has a tooth sticking out with her mouth closed, would you actually find her cute? Probably not. This is probably one of those weird moe shit that is exclusive to the realm of 2-D.

— We learn a bit more about Momoka this week, and it turns out that she has an inferiority complex. She’s both a brilliant student and an amazing athlete, but because her sister is a hot model who gets all of the boys, Momoka has a negative opinion about herself. Feelings can be so irrational, huh?

— The girl eventually sees a news program promoting soy milk as a means to getting larger breast. But instead of simply drinking it, she’s instructed to pour it on her breasts and then give herself a massage. Welp, at least soy milk can’t go rancid in a hot bath…

— Where did the whole “rub your breasts to make them bigger” idea even come from anyway? Did some dude trick his gullible girlfriend with it and the belief somehow spread even though it’s patently untrue? Or is it one of those “I know it’s not true, but I want to believe” kinda nonsense?

— Not surprisingly, Momoka ends up passing out in the bath, so Ret has to “save the day” and carry her to safety. And when his “H energy” shoots up as a result — totally not an erection joke! — Momoka’s mood improves considerably. Ah well, harems gotta harem.

— In the second half of the episode, Ret not only manages to stop the panty thief, he even keeps his pants on this time. That’s progress!

— Kirara feels the pressure to perform, so she takes the initiative by buying some fancy lingerie. She then proceeds to sneak into Ret’s room later that night, because that’s her solution. Really? You won’t use porn, but you’ll climb into a guy’s bed and lay there like a dead fish?

— Naturally, neither of them do anything. After all, this isn’t porn; it’s just a flaccid ecchi series. As a result, the couple lay there and remember how they used to be so close as children. So I guess that’s the real shame. Children can be honest with themselves, but as we grow up, we just accumulate all this filthy shame thanks to society. Darn you, superego!

— Anyways, Ret and Kirara continue to be boring until someone finally makes a move. Unfortunately, that someone ends up being Sora, who has one again “mistaken” Ret’s room for her own. Uh-huh. I’m sure that’s believable in this harem anime.

— Finally back in her room, Kirara is frustrated at Ret even though she totally doesn’t have feelings for him. Eventually, her feelings boil over and she ends up firing a beam all the way into space. I guess she has the potential to be the strongest hero, but her “H energy” only ever seem to manifest when she’s thinking about Ret. Porn probably wouldn’t work on her after all… unless it’s Ret porn! Ah-hah! In that case, she’ll need to commission a few artists and/or authors.

More family drama.

— As you might have already expected, Sasha is your typical tsuntsun heroine. She basically fell in love with Anos because he can look into her eyes and compliment them, but she won’t admit it. Nevertheless, the only other person who can do this is her sister. So why does she hate Misha so much then? Well, the obvious answer is that she doesn’t.

— Some dude shows up to teach the class all about fusion magic. He looks like he just walked straight out of the Overlord series, but nevermind that. In any case, his name is Ivis, and he’s supposedly one of the seven emperors created from Anos’s blood. So he should remember our protagonist, right? Well, apparently not. Anos wonders if Ivis’s memories have somehow been erased. Maybe. Or maybe it isn’t even Ivis. You never know. It’s been 2000 years, so he might be talking to an imposter.

— Anos tries to retrieve Ivis’s memories by… I dunno, facepalming the guy? Needless to say, everyone including the instructor is beside themselves over Anos’s impropriety. But does Ivis, one of the supposedly fearsome emperors, bother to punish the protagonist afterwards? Of course not. And it’s probably beacause he he knows he can’t. So does anyone else now believe that Anos might be the real deal? Nope, they won’t. That’s the funny thing about superpowered heroes. Naturally, I don’t like them at all. I absolutely think dorks like Anos are really boring because they just steamroll over everything… and yet, what’s even worse than this is when everyone around said overpowered heroes is so stubbornly and willfully blind to the obvious truth. Whether or not Anos is the actual founder, it’s pretty damn obvious that he’s stronger than everyone here. In fact, why is he even enrolled? Just for kicks? Does he just want to observe for himself the sorry state that demons have found themselves in?

— There’s another boring exam for the students to take. This time, they have to plumb the depths of a castle and retrieve magical artifacts for points. Luckily for Anos’s group, this is his castle, so he knows exactly how to retrieve the best artifact. Ho hum.

— It’s clear that this series has settled into a comfortable routine. Every week, the girls will come across a problem, and Anos will follow up with a solution that sounds oh so simple. “Oh no, this door has powerful anti-magic protections! Whatever shall we do?!” “Just open it, dumdum! lulz”

— The major drama of the week still concerns the two sisters. In fact, they’re twin sisters, and Misha wants to give Sasha something nice for their upcoming birthday. With Anos’s help, she settles on a robe blessed with fire magic. Anos wants to give Misha some ice ring, but the girl turns down the offer… probably because she knows what’s coming up.

— Back when they were children, Sasha couldn’t make friends because she had no control over her demonic eyes. Nevertheless, Misha was always there for her. And with Misha’s help, however, Sasha eventually got over that lonely phase of her life. And yet, one hates the other. Hm.

— When Anos steps out of the room to let Sasha put on the robe, he returns later to find a knife in Misha’s chest. Oh no, the evil sister is back! Or is she? See, Anos isn’t just overpowered magically. He’s also overpowered in every other category, so he can tell right away that Sasha doesn’t actually hate her sister. The knife in the chest seems mighty convincing, but these are powerful mages. If Sasha really wanted to kill her sister, she obviously could’ve done a lot worse. What’s funny, however, is that Anos kinda goes overboard with his example of what she could’ve done instead. Alright, chill out, psycho. But I digress. The point is that Sasha is practically begging Anos to heal her sister, because by now, we all know that our hero can do this easily. So what is Sasha really up to?

— Plus, all of the promo stuff firmly establishes Sasha as the other heroine, so even as a viewer going into this series blind (after all, I would never willingly read a light novel), there’s no reason for me to believe that the girl is actual evil. I have to imagine that she has to hate her sister or something bad will happen. I don’t know what, but you know how lame these anime twists are. In any case, my point is that the story pretty spoiled itself.

— Our hero was about to force the truth out of Sasha when Misha begs him to spare her sister. As a result, Sasha gets to escape, but probably not for long. After all, our demon lord can probably just track her down in an instant or whatever. Maybe close the doors so she’s trapped in some room. But that’s for next week’s episode.

— If he can’t get any answers out of Sasha, then maybe he get the truth from Misha instead. Unfortunately, the episode is just about over, so we’re simply told that Misha will disappear at midnight. Apparently, she was never supposed to exist in the first place. Who knows? Maybe she’s gonna fuse with Sasha or something. After all, they did very conspicuously introduce Ivis, the guy who is supposed to be an expert on fusion magic. I’m sure Anos will show up him very soon, though.

Tears, tears, and more tears.

— In the cold opening, we see a flashback involving Momiji and his father. Momo has started taking violin lessons, and by itself, this is all fine and dandy. Unfortunately, she and her brother  now share the same instructor, so their father wants Momiji to quit. Tch, always with the extremes. I mean, c’mon, is there only one goddamn violin instructor in the entirety of Japan? It’s confounding, isn’t it? I know Fruits Basket likes to dial the sadness to 11, but it does so at the expense of making sense.

— After the OP, Arisa reveals to her friends that she has taken on completely different part-time jobs? Why? ‘Cause she’s tired of wishing and hoping that Kureno would one day drop by. But when Tohru realizes that Arisa is talking about one of the Sohmas, our plucky heroine decides that she has to do something about this. I get it and I don’t. Arisa is one of her besties, so of course, she’s gonna want to do everything she can to help her bestie out. On the other hand, Arisa is obviously trying to move on. That’s why she insists that her Kureno can’t possibly be the same Kureno that Tohru is talking about. You can’t recklessly give people hope, because if that hope can’t be realized, you’re really just drawing out their pain.

— That night, Tohru asks Kyo about Kureno, but he doesn’t know much about the guy either. Even within the Sohma family, Kureno keeps to himself. Still, I wonder why Tohru stopped there. Why not ask some of the older Sohmas like Shigure, Hatori, or Kazuma? Ah well.

— Tohru goes all the way to the Sohma estate, but she doesn’t have enough courage to just walk through the front gates. To be fair, she probably wouldn’t get very far anyways. But as luck would have it, she runs right into Momo, who is there just to listen to Momiji playing the violin. It’s like a mini-culture shock to me. The thought of a young girl wandering the streets on her own sounds like a potential nightmare in the making. But I dunno, maybe Japan is safe enough for Momo to do whatever she wants.

— Anyways, Momo knows a secret entrance into the estate. There’s literally just a gaping hole in the walls that no one has bothered to patch up. Alrighty.

— The little girl confesses that she’s very curious about Momiji. After all, he’s her brother, so they obviously resemble each other. More than anything, she hopes that she could have a big brother to play with. Tohru is already worked up over Arisa and Kureno, so upon hearing this, the girl is on the verge of breaking into tears. And as soon as she talks to Momiji, the dam breaks.

— Momiji is happy that he and his sister share a connection even though it’s an extremely tenuous one. He even opens up to Tohru about one of his dreams. At the moment, however, it remains an impossible dream. Until the curse is broken, Momiji will always keep his distance in order to protect his family’s happiness. It’s not bizarre for kids to sacrifice a little of their happiness to help the family. Everyone pitching in for the sake of the whole is a noble idea. Unfortunately, the pendulum has swung too far in the other direction in Fruits Basket. Momiji has to erase his own identity just because his parents are complete cowards. And of course, this just one small corner of the complete Sohma pastiche. After all, the cat exists as a scapegoat, i.e. another form of sacrifice.

— Anyways, Tohru reveals why she’s sneaked into the estate: she wants to talk Kureno into seeing Arisa at least one more time. That’s insane, isn’t it? I care about my friends, but I wouldn’t trespass for them. I certainly would’ve spent more time seeing if there were other options to contact Kureno. Plus, Akito drew blood the last time they met. Literally drew blood. On the other hand, our heroine is getting gutsier and gutsier by the day. You gotta commend her for that… even if what she’s doing is completely foolhardy.

— Even though Momiji lives here, Kureno lives within the inner estate so he’s rarely seen. There are layers to this madness. Still, the young Sohma draws our heroine a map, and off she goes! Tohru proceeds to do her best Solid Snake act.

— In the end, she almost gets caught by a woman whose face we can’t see. Tohru recognizes her voice, but I don’t. I wonder who it is.

— Kureno comes to Tohru’s rescue, so they talk a bit. She tells him about how Arisa is doing lately, but he tells her that he simply can’t leave and it’s not even because he’s one of the Zodiacs. After all, his curse is somehow already broken. Nevertheless, he still isn’t free. I like that he doesn’t actually explain this to Tohru. He simply looks up and sees a bird taking off into the sky. Even though associating birds with freedom is certainly far from original, it’s a nice bit of visual storytelling.

— Despite Kureno’s resistance, Tohru presses on. She writes down Arisa’s contact information and gives it to Kureno. She asks him to hold onto it, because you never know! Maybe he’ll feel like reaching out one day!

— After Tohru leaves with Momiji’s help, we see Kureno holding onto that scrap of paper… that scrape of hope, if you want to be as corny as possible. But honestly, Arisa should move on, especially since Kureno pretty much ghosted her. Tohru is technically right. You never know what dreams may come. But there has to be a limit to that — a limit that is feasible and healthy. Arisa can’t just wait forever. She still has her own life to live. And who knows? Maybe she’ll meet other people, start dating them, and fall in love. That’s just life. But this is fantasy drama land, so she’ll probably sit tight and pine for Kureno all the way to the very end. The idea that someone you barely know would wait for you is bizarre for me, but these love stories are for dreamers, not realists.

— At the end of the day, Tohru doesn’t tell Kyo exactly what she was up to, but she does lament that she couldn’t do more for Arisa. I dunno, man. Putting your life at risk for your best friend’s… barely-a-relationship is more than the bare minimum to me. I don’t dislike Tohru, but I’m not a fan either. Even so, I think she should give herself more credit.

— Kyo thinks Tohru is talking about a crush, which the girl quickly denies. Nevertheless, he tells her that if she ever finds someone that she likes, he would help her out. The girl starts crying, but she doesn’t know why. I think it’s obvious. His words imply that he can’t be one of those lucky candidates for her heart. He’s removing himself from the competition, and even though Tohru might not consciously realize the meaning behind his words, her subconscious does.

First things first, I guess I appreciate the fact that Subaru didn’t stick around for a conversation with Echidna. I felt as though the scene was dragging on long enough, and I didn’t particularly want an info dump. You know it would’ve been one too, because she’s apparently the Witch of Greed because she has an insatiable thirst for knowledge. Still, I gotta question him gulping down his cup without any hesitation. Even if it doesn’t kill him, you never know if it might be laced with something unpleasant (though I suppose there are lots of people into that sort of thing). But whatever, Subaru’s got plot armor so it won’t matter in the long run.

Once our hero’s back with Emilia, there’s a minor scuffle with Garfiel (only dragons were hurt in the filming of this episode). Our heroes then proceed deeper into Sanctuary and finally meet up with the seemingly heavily-injured Roswaal. They quickly learn that halfies (and the villagers) are magically trapped within Sanctuary, and the only way out is to complete a series of trials. Well, that’s convenient. It also makes me wonder how Frederica got out. Maybe she was purposefully let go in order to lure our heroes here. But at this point, I’m just speculating, and that’s not too useful. Anyways, even though I’m not a huge fan of exposition, I’m kinda surprised that both Subaru and Emilia didn’t grill Roswaal on the details. I mean, we’re just trapped? Why? What for? And what are the trials like? What do they involve? What are they testing? Physical? Mental? Emotional? I mean, information is power, so don’t you wanna know as much as you can before going forward? Bah, I suppose Roswaal wouldn’t reveal much; he seems like he’s up to something nefarious.

Before undergoing the trials, Emilia has an emotional talk with the trapped villagers. They treated her terribly, but she’s still going to let bygones by bygones and help them out. I suppose that’s commendable, but they were gonna be freed anyways, right? If she wants to leave, she’ll have to take the trials. And if she succeeds, then the barrier is lifted so it’s not like she’s going out of her way to help them. Maybe I’m misunderstanding something. Ah well, even if I’m not, I suppose I’m just nitpicking.

Naturally, Emilia isn’t the only one who will get to have some fun. Subaru is the main character, so for some reason, he also gets to take the trials as well. Still, I had to laugh when he ran in just to find Emilia unconscious again. Unfortunately, he can’t help her right away, because part of his trials involves going back to his world…? Or at the very least, some illusion of it.

Deca-Dence

— At the start of the episode, Kaburagi watches a video recording of when Natsume was supposed to have died. Her chip malfunctioned, but the paramedics were able to revive her. And that somehow makes her a bug? Wouldn’t the malfunctioning chip itself be the bug? Still, I’m surprised that a recording of this event even exists. Are there cameras everywhere?

— Kaburagi has Natsume start off by fighting one of the weaker Gadolls in a tutorial zone. I want to say weakest, but I mean… Pipe exists. Naturally, combat here as video gamey as it needs to be; after all, this is entertainment for Gears. When you attack a Gadoll, it creates a field in which gravity is unstable. This is why fighters can float and glide around like they’re in a video game. Not only that, you gotta kill Gadolls in order to harvest their precious oxyone. What I’m curious about is whether or not this game has a purpose beyond mere entertainment. The corporation always ends every message with “Have a profitable day.” How does one make a profit here, though? By playing the game? But judging by the “gameplay,” it almost seems like the Gadolls were purposefully created to be hunted. If that’s the case, we’re recycling resources rather than harvesting them.

— The show’s story structure is pretty basic, so we naturally proceed to a montage. When Fei hears that Natsume has started training to fight Gadolls, the girl tries to persuade her best friend to stop now. Obviously, it’s dangerous out there, and Natsume’s prosthetic arm isn’t suitable for combat. As a result, some doubt starts to creep in, and Natsume briefly considers throwing in the towel at one point. But after a bit of pep talk, it’s yet another training montage. Kinda boring, really.

— Meanwhile, the corporation is starting to get on Kaburagi’s case. Apparently, he’s been so busy training Natsume that he has started to neglect his original duties of seeking out bugs. Or maybe he just wants to stop doing it altogether. If Kaburagi intends to use Natsume in order to challenge the System, I don’t think it’s very smart for him to shirk his duties. He knows he’s being closely watched. If his activities deviate at all, he’s bound to raise suspicions… and this will likely happen in a future episode.

— When I think of bugs and computers, I think of something that only exist due to, well, mistakes by the programmer. Perhaps Natsume does represent a sort of security vulnerability to the system. In that case, she’s more akin to a virus or other types of malware. I don’t see her as a bug, though… as far as software bugs are concerned. I guess the word “bug” here is used to imply a sort of disease?

— We get more exposition in the form of a documentary. Blah blah blah, humans screwed themselves, and the machines took over. The all-seeing-System now rules over everyone. Order is paramount… and yet cyborgs are allowed to have their own personalities, and thus some semblance of “free will” that the System can’t control. As a result, someone like Kaburagi can “rebel” and form some of resistance. Shrug.

— Also, Pipe is apparently a bug. If Gadolls were created by the machines for the purpose of this game, I suppose he might very be one. He might be a mistake that they didn’t account for.

— Natsume can only go so far with her prosthetic arm, so Kaburagi upgrades it for her out of his own pocket. As a result, she now has five fingers on her right hand. It can also turn into a weapon. Shoulda just done this from the start.

— Before they can test out her new arm, however, the Gadolls attack. Now, are these spontaneous or scripted events? And what do Gears do when there isn’t an event happening? Do they just go out to a dangerous zone by themselves and mindlessly grind?

— Pipe gets lost during the chaos, so Natsume runs off on her own to try and rescue the little Gadoll. We then get a short backstory for the little fella. Basically, Kaburagi bought a home within the Deca-Dence just to keep Pipe as a pet. He can even call in a favor in order to track Pipe down.

— In any case, the episode ends before a big battle can occur.

— Other than the mystery surrounding the System, I’m not too invested in the rest of the story. Natsume isn’t offensive or anything; she certainly has a lot of energy. Nevertheless, I just don’t really have an emotional connection to her character. Right now, she’s not really interesting despite the fact that she’s the main character.

You wouldn’t go this far for just a friend, would you?

— We get to meet a new character this week, and she’s already drooling over Shinichi. But hey, if Hana gets to be eye-candy, it’s only fair that her counterpart is a beefcake.

— If you ask me, Ami is more my style despite Hana looking like she’s designed by a focus group, but that’s neither here nor there…

— In any case, it doesn’t take long for Master’s daughter to get hooked on Hana’s antics. That’s why we’re all here, right?

— Soon after, Shinichi falls gravely ill, but I dunno. They say “manflus” are a thing. Basically, guys tend to exaggerate even the simplest colds. Plus, it doesn’t help that he’s living the typical college guy life, i.e. no medicine on hand, empty fridge, so on and so forth. I lived that life. I know how it is. Even now, I tend to be super lazy and rely on my slow cooker more often than not.

— Luckily, Hana is here to the rescue. Thanks to Master, she now knows where he lives. Shinichi won’t ever get an ounce of privacy again.

— Can she really catch a 180cm guy falling on top of her? Kinda doubt it.

— I know girls are typically expected to be caretakers and nurturers in pretty much every culture out there, but Hana goes the extra mile for her senpai. She buys him meds, she goes grocery shopping, she cooks up a hot, satisfying meal, she spoon-feeds the guy, and last but not least, she even wipes him down. C’mon, just friends? Who are you kidding? This is serious time and commitment. You couldn’t get this kind of TLC for less than $100, probably.

— In any case, Hana is almost the perfect waifu. Almost. She should’ve gone home, but she couldn’t help herself now that she’s finally in his apartment. Hana just has to stay over and keep him up while gaming. But hey, if you want a gamer waifu, then she’s back to perfect again.

— By the way, I’ll pass on being wiped down by a cloth. I’d rather just take a shower. I know they say doing this might exacerbate your illness, but just dry yourself properly. Also, congee might as well be “Chicken Soup for the Soul” for Asians.

— Can you imagine a boss taking you out to Korean BBQ just because you’re no longer sick? I mean, I can’t even imagine a nice boss! But seriously, Hana might have a crush on Shinichi, but Master really cares about him too. Okay, sure, he and his daughter just want to observe the “couple” in action for their own amusement, but it’s still harmless.

— Yo, that meat should be on the bone.

— Shinichi is worried that rumors might spread if people spot Hana coming in and out of his place. It’s a valid concern… if people didn’t already think they were dating.

— When Hana realizes that Shinichi calls Ami by her first name, she gets moody. His excuse is that there are two Asai, so he has to distinguish between the two of them. Sure, but doesn’t he already just call the old man Master? Ah well.

— Hana’s solution? Hynotism. And when he plays along, her reaction is far from platonic. And like I said before, rumors have already begun to spread on campus. Shinichi may as well reap all of the benefits and have his kouhei come over everyday.

— There’s an extra scene after the credits just to hammer home the fact that Hana really trusts Shinichi. Apparently, he’s the only person who can hypnotize her. I know nothing about hypnotism, so I guess I can’t really comment on this.

Don’t mind me. I’m just here to rag on Kazuya.

— Mami was gonna invite Kazuya over to her place, but our “hero” ends up being cockblocked by her younger brother. He still won’t give up, though.

— Calm down, hornball.

— Like in previous episodes, all he does is stare lecherously at Mami, but I’m supposed to believe that he’s fallen deeply in love with her. In reality, he pretty much just latched himself to the first pretty girl to show him any attention, and he now mistakes it for love. All he talks about is her looks.

— This is kinda funny coming from Mami. I mean, they’re both horrible people. Case in point, Mami starts badmouthing Chizuru. Kazuya actually stands up for his rental girlfriend, but he then starts to worry that doing the right thing might have cost him a chance in Mami’s pants. Aww, poor baby can’t get laid.

— Afterwards, Kazuya tries to apologize for Chizuru, but I kinda hate how he does it. Now, now,  you’re probably thinking, “You just have it out for this guy.” You’re right! I despise guys like Kazuya! But seriously, isn’t it annoying when people apologize by talking shit about themselves? It feels… manipulative. Instead of honest contrition, they’re suddenly making the apology all about them. If you’re a softie (like Chizuru), you can’t help but then comfort the person who has wronged you!

— Naturally, the sad sack act works on Chizuru, so she tries to comfort him. It’s worked on her before, so why would it be any different now! She even offers to extend their professional relationship when (again) she should just be cutting him off. Plus, her platitudes might make sense with anyone other than Kazuya. He’s not hung up on Mami, because he cares about her as a person, though. He just wants to bang her.

— This guy doesn’t have a job, right? I thought his dad was gonna cut him off.

— Anyways, Kazuya and his friends are headed to the beach. On the way there, however, his buddy tells him to make things right with Chizuru. Kazuya is annoyed, but I don’t think he has any right to be. The reason why his buddy “doesn’t know anything” is because he’s a liar. Like what does he expect? “Ugh, I totally misled you, but you should still know better!!!”

— Calm down, hornball.

— Not surprisingly, Mami doesn’t have the purest intentions.

— It’s a small world, so Chizuru also ends up going to the beach with her friends. They’re headed to the same beach, too. But hey, I’ve never been to Japan. Maybe Shimoda is the only place to go.

— Even sand-encrusted ass gets this hornball going.

— Meanwhile, Mami is pulling out all of the big guns to try and break Kazuya and Chizuru up. Who’s Maya? Oh, just their hypothetical daughter. Who picks out baby names in a one-month relationship? These dorks, apparently. Still, her emotionally manipulative tactics work on Kazuya, so he’s about to spill the beans about him and Chizuru. Unfortunately, he’s cut short when his rental girlfriend makes a sudden appearance.

— Apparently, this is also a small beach, so Chizuru and her friends run into Kazuya’s group. But like before, she’s the Clark Kent of rental girlfriends. Just slap on some glasses and braid her hair, and no one will recognize her.

— Then to make matters worse, Kazuya and Chizuru end up going to the same restroom. One island nation, one beach… one fucking restroom? Are you kidding me?

— Still, Kazuya is emboldened by Mami’s obvious lies, so he already assumes that they’ll get back together. As a result, he has to tie up some loose ends with Chizuru. I just don’t think being arrogant about it is a good idea. I mean, c’mon, he needed to rent a girlfriend. He has no business getting cocky in the first place.

— Sadly, the two of them spend too much time talking, so Kazuya’s friends come looking for him. Unable to escape, Chizuru has no choice but to turn into her rental girlfriend self and hang out with them. So uh, what about her friends? Won’t they be worried that she just suddenly disappeared?

— Now that Chizuru is here, Mami must feel as though she has to play her best card. So when nobody’s looking, she pulls Kazuya behind a conveniently large rock and kisses him. I dunno, I think they kinda deserve each other. They’re both kinda terrible people. Usually, the male lead has some redeemable qualities, but we’re three episodes in and I still can’t spot anything decent about this guy. I guess he loves his grandmother, but I mean… aren’t you supposed to?