Well, we certainly trimmed a lot of the fat. And from the looks of Silver Spoon, there’s plenty more waste to dispose of!

* * * * *

Gin no Saji S2 Ep. 4

Episode summary: They compete in a horse jumping competition. They don’t even do all that well.

Thoughts: I’m out. This show is even more boring than watching paint dry. Hell, paint drying is practically Mardi Gras when you compare it to Silver Spoon. This anime is an insult to paint. It doesn’t even get to be in the same room as paint. C’mon paint, let’s go grab a beer.

* * * * *

Golden Time Ep. 16

Episode summary: When the car crashes, everyone realizes how close they truly came to dying. In the following weeks, Koko isolates herself from the rest of the group because she blames herself for everything. Eventually, Banri musters up the courage to pay his girlfriend a visit at her own home, but she stuns by telling him that she wants to break up. As expected, Koko’s insecurities stem from Banri’s wishy-washy nature, but eventually, she reaffirms her wish to be with him forever.

Thoughts: Man, I know Koko screwed up and all, but her dad is insane. He just slaps her to the ground in front of all her friends. The girl then sits there on the asphalt, sobbing to herself, and the lack of action here is what really gets my goat. Banri stands there all slack-jawed, not moving a single muscle as his girlfriend cried. Where are your instincts, man? Yes, she screwed up but when you see someone you claim to care about in pain — I don’t care if it’s your girlfriend or your parents or whoever — and you don’t immediately try to embrace and console them, I really have to question your character. What is wrong with you? Why are you so goddamn passive? This is the same guy who lets himself get abused by Nana every time she sees him so I guess I can’t expect muchn

Anyway, I wish the show had a voice of reason. I wish someone could shake Koko and tell there’s no such thing as an on/off switch for adulthood. Part of why she’s breaking down is because she saw herself as an adult, but an adult doesn’t get… sleepy and crash the car? Okay, that’s another thing. Let me just interrupt my train of thought just to say that anime doesn’t have the balls to go hard. What I mean is that I could understand Koko’s reaction — and maybe even her dad’s reaction — if she really screwed up. Like, if she willingly drove drunk or something. Now that’s a major fuck up. Falling asleep at the wheel is bad too, but it’s not on that level. I’m just saying it’s hard to buy into this week’s events because of it. I don’t feel like Koko’s a major child because of it.

Anyway, back to what I was originally going to say… there isn’t an on/off switch for adulthood. We just gradually mature until we become adults. Sure, we’re classified as adults as soon as we reach a certain age, but that’s just for legal expediency. So I wish someone could tell Koko that, “Hey, accidents will still happen. We’re all just learning as we go along.” Banri’s advice is more along the lines of “Get out there and carry the shame with you! Yeah! Don’t run away and abandon your life! Get out there and accept your flaws and… mistakes… boy this sure does sound familiar. In the end, Banri just sort of argues himself into a corner until her problem slowly begins to be about him.

In the end, we get to the real root of the problem and it’s that Koko still fears that Banri will abandon her one day. She has nightmares where they’ll be driving in a car, but she’s forced to get out of it at one point. Once she does, her boyfriend will just drive off into the distance without her. Okay… well let’s face it, her insecurities are as much Banri’s fault as it is hers. I mean, he isn’t even ready to kiss her yet even though they’ve been dating for how long? Of course she’s going to be insecure about the relationship. He hasn’t done anything to prove that he’s committed to her. It’s the case where you either shit or get off the pot, but instead of getting Banri to actually meet her half way, the anime apparently has a much better solution in mind.

First, Koko will embarrass herself in front of her father. Then, she’ll throw a tantrum on the bed until she tires herself out. Then once she’s asleep, Banri whispers into her ears, encouraging her dream self not to get out of the car. Like really? How ’bout you both sit down and define what your relationship is? Nah, let’s work dream magic!

* * * * *

Mahou Sensou Ep. 4

Episode summary: Out of nowhere, Mui runs off to look for her brother. Her friends idiotically enter the Ruined World to save their friend despite being amateur magicians. Once there, Takeshi combines his magic with Ida’s magic to defeat Mui’s brother, and in the end, all four of them return to the academy safely. But watch out! It looks like one of the academy’s teachers is working for the bad guys!

Thoughts: Idiots. Idiots everywhere. How many times did our heroes get to step off to the side and have a private conversation while Mui’s brother just floated there and did nothing? It was patently comical. Sure, you guys may take the time to come up a strategy to defeat me. It’s alright, I won’t stop you! Hell, it’s bad enough that the battles are ugly and jam-packed with stupid spell names like “Wire Blizzard” and “Icy Castle.” And even worse, we get the following exchange:

Kurumi: “It’s fine. Just lie still.”
Mui: “Kurumi…”
Kurumi: “It’s Curative Magic. Though it’ll only tide you over for now.”
Mui: “Thank you, Kurumi.”
Kurumi (blushing): “I’m not doing this for you or anything. I just wanted a chance to use this magic I just learned.”

Fuck you, anime. Fuck you.

Today, we embark on a quest to get a girl to smile. After all, it’s like a crime or something if a girl isn’t always smiling.

* * * * *

Nourin Ep. 4

The first half of the episode is actually (sadly?) not very harem-like, so I’m afraid there isn’t much for me to say about it. This is Harem Hill, after all; people aren’t exactly here to read recaps about stuff that doesn’t involve harems! Make no mistake about it though… the first half of the episode was still dumb and boring. A monkey is causing trouble for our group of future farmhands. It’s been eating the crops and just creating general havoc when it isn’t hungry. After a brief brainstorming session — and this is an insult to the word ‘brainstorming’ — everyone finally settles upon hiring a professional to subdue the wild beast: an anime otaku. Yeah, it’s as unfunny as it sounds in writing.

Other than a few boob-related gags, nothing here was particularly Harem Hill-worthy. Oh, Minori did get her clothes shot off by a fireworks gatling gun (don’t ask), but still… it isn’t until after the monkey’s caught that our terrible show returns to its primary purpose. The initial plan is to send the monkey off to the zoo whereupon it’ll have its own harem, but nevertheless, Ringo is sad about how the whole thing played out. And if Ringo is sad, then Kousaku has to be sad too. He does some research on his own until he discovers something, but we don’t get to find out what that something is just quite yet. In the meantime, he needs to speak to Minori privately, but the girl mistakes this for an invitation to knock some boots. As a result, she quickly redecorates her room:

What a curious redecoration! It’s almost as if she wants the audience to know for sure that no rape is about to take place! But it’s alright, Minori. We all know Kousaku is the gormless type of loser who would never rape a girl. That’s a peculiar thing about harem leads, isn’t it? Oh, they can be lecherous — they can even be giant perverts — but when it comes to the actual deed itself, the dick that gets all the girls’ attention suddenly can’t perform! And why is that? Why is he now the oblivious shounen and Minori the overly-aggressive, sex-crazed shoujo? Because to actually have sex is to connect with another human being. Physically, mentally, spiritually… ecumenically — whatever. The point is that harem anime are onanistic.

The thing about harem anime is that it isn’t like real life harems at all. I’ve never had my own harem — yes, it’s sad, I know — but I’ve heard the owner of a harem actually get to fuck his (could be a her too) girls. Does this ever happen in harem anime outside of a few rare cases like Yosuga no Sora? In general, these shows are about lust, but at the same time, they’re not about fulfilling it. As such, harem anime is onanistic. This is why the watershed moment in which the harem lead confesses his undying love to one of the girls is often indefinitely deferred. How many times have we gotten the sort of ending where nobody wins and everything is back to where we originally started (e.g. NakaImo)? The entire point of these shows is to blueball the main character, and hence the audience, for as long as possible because if the protagonist ever acted in a proactive manner and chose a mate, the story would die. For this reason, story progression — and indeed, character progression as well — is anathema to a “successful” harem anime. Whoops, show’s over folks! Don’t have to keep tuning in. Don’t have to wait another week to read another crappy chapter in which absolutely nothing happens, but we can all sit here and speculate as to which of the (un)lucky girls will win the hero’s affections (answer: none of them will).

Back to Nourin, Kousaku reveals he wants to talk about Ringo much to Minori’s chagrin. He’s noticed that Ringo has yet to smile since she’s gotten here. Oh boy, what a pity that is! So here comes the oh-so-hilarious attempts by her friends to make the morose girl smile. Kei steps up to the plate first. His tactic, you wonder? Oh, it’s just to compare his pubic hair to a black man’s afro:

No? Not funny? Insensitive?! Relax! It’s just a joke! Ha ha… ha. Minori volunteers next, and her trick is to tickle the poor girl. Unfortunately, the tickling session somehow becomes a lesbian session:

Again, it’s onanistic; the harem lead can watch but he can never touch. In any case, the tickling fails to get Ringo to smile. Instead, she turns it around on Minori and somehow nearly undresses her friend in a reverse-tickling attempt. Afterwards, Ringo demands to know what Kousaku and his friends are up to, in which the harem lead reveals his “pure”-hearted intention: he was just worried that she wasn’t enjoying her new life at the agricultural school! Aw, how sweet… if you bought that steaming pile of shit. Ringo reveals, however, that she can’t smile (dun dun dun!). After being an idol for so long, the girl has lost her ability to look happy. As a result, she had to retire! Who… who out there will be able to penetrate her stony exterior to reveal the smiling shoujo hidden underneath?!

Later that night, Kousaku has a dream vision:

The following morning, he and his friends take Ringo to see a dead patch of soil. Plants can’t grow there because its previous owners abused it until it was no longer fertile (I won’t get into the details because who cares?). Still, you can slowly fix the problem over a long period of time. It’ll just take a lot of hard work, dedication, and most importantly, love. With these ingredients, even the dead patch of soil the kids are standing on will one day be reborn… yo, it’s a metaphor! Suddenly, the clouds begin to part! The sun comes out! Ringo bites into a fresh but unripe tomato… and… and…?!

There it is!

* * * * *

Nisekoi Ep. 4

According to Kosaki’s best friend Ruri, “…there’s no law that says you can’t go after someone just because he’s already in love with someone else.” Well, of course there isn’t a law against it, but it’s still a pretty scummy thing to do. But I forget that we’re watching a harem anime, so being scummy just comes naturally to everyone in these stories. In any case, Ruri arranges a study session at Raku’s home. Her hope is that Kosaki will take the opportunity to get closer to the harem lead, but we all know the best laid schemes of mice and men often go awry. Chitoge and Shu, Raku’s best friend, comes along for the ride.

So y’know the drill… Raku and Kosaki like each other, but they can’t really do anything about it. Especially not in front of their friends, anyway. Shu reveals to his best bud that he’s always known Raku’s relationship with Chitoge was a sham. He even reveals that Kosaki has a crush on Raku, much to the harem lead’s surprise and skepticism. But this is a harem, after all, so things starts to pull back towards Chitoge’s direction. Raku’s mischievous yakuza guys — I don’t really know what to call them — traps him and Chitoge in a dark and scary storeroom. Unsurprisingly enough, the ice queen is now clinging to Raku’s back like scared, little waif.

Here’s the thing about harem candidates like our blonde “Gorilla.” The whole point of tsunderekkos or any sort of “powerful” female character in a harem is to successively tear them down and bring them to a level below the main character. This preferably occurs when the tsundere realizes that those feelings deep within her is actually ~true love~. Case in point, the loud, outspoken girl from overseas now jumps into the arms of the worthless nerd because it is so kowaii. Keep in mind that Kosaki represents the ideal girl because she’s feminine. This is where the story goes, “Whoa, whoa, whoa… don’t worry! Chitoge doesn’t actually go against the status quo at all. She too has a character flaw that will render as feminine as Kosaki!” And voila!

‘Cause fuck the validity of her character: “What the hell? She’s totally different from her normal self.” Gorbachev, tear down this tsunderekko: “But looking at her now,” Raku continues, “I can see that she is a girl, after all…” The implicit statement here is that Chitoge wasn’t actually a girl before when she was just being “herself.” Oh, of course, she is technically of the female sex, but in Raku’s eyes — in anime’s eyes — she wasn’t feminine. She was masculine. Her battleaxe personality was actually breaking the established gender roles. Therefore, by rendering our heroine a quivering blob of insecurities, her femininity has been restored! Praise anime Jesus ’cause we have a girl again! He now notices how beautiful she is. Raku catches himself staring at her soft, sparkly lips, the same lips that used to berate him. And because her eyes are totally glistening with tears now, he notices how long her eyelashes are! Wow, what a babe! Totally a complete uggo before, but she’s transformed right before our very eyes and all we had to do was to make her a chicken shit!

But y’know, hold your horses ’cause it’s just the fourth episode of the series. We’ve got plenty of time to continue chipping away at Chitoge’s exterior. In the meantime, enjoy Raku’s back and forth dance as he wonders which of the two hot babes in his life he should ultimately pick. Our couple spies a ladder which they can use to escape the storeroom. But of course, Chitoge is too scared to walk on her own two feet, so Raku “bravely” decides to stay by her side! Doki doki. They begin to share a conversation, and the girl decides to ask Raku what he thinks of Kosaki. His words are pretty telling considering what I’ve just been talking about: “…[Kosaki]‘s hot, and well-groomed, and adorable, and feminine… She’s absolutely the ideal girl, you know?”

Eventually, they start screaming over the topic of kissing and who’s actually done it. And eventually, this conversation temporarily cures Chitoge of her phobia. She tries to stand up to use the ladder, but her legs are asleep. As a result, she slips and falls. Can you guess what — or better yet, who — she ends up falling on? That’s right! Raku! Doki doki. But remember what I said about how the story progression in harem anime must always be indefinitely deferred? Claude shows up at just the right time to interrupt our love birds. Not only does he prevent Raku and Chitoge from growing any closer to each other, this also reminds Kosaki that her two friend are supposed to be a couple. Naturally, she runs off, and as a result, the story resets itself. Yay.

* * * * *

Saikin, Imouto no Yousu ga Chotto Okashiinda ga. Ep. 5

Is it time for the bathing suit episode already? Wow! Why on earth Mitsuki agreed to go to a pool when she’s forced to wear a chastithong — and yes, that’s what I’m calling it now — is beyond me. But you can already guess how the rest of this episode will play out. The anime will try its damndest to get Mitsuki to lose her bottoms somehow and expose her underaged ass cheeks to the world. Can you believe someone actually called this show a deep anime? That’s what I get for wandering into strange, twisted places like anime forums. Well, to be fair, they thought last week’s episode was deep, but still… the word ‘deep’ should never, ever be associated with ImoCho. But let us continue on with the show.

Somehow, Hiyori’s also dressed for the occasion; she’s actually sporting a two-piece bikini. Where has she been keeping it this entire time time? Does she have a ghost suitcase? A ghost armoire? A ghost closet full of ghostly garments to wear to the different events throughout the show? Or maybe she went down to the ghost bikini store. In any case, what’s important is that we get fanservice. And oh boy do we get fanservice!

Yes, what a coincidence. Remember how they ran into each other “randomly” at the supermarket? Remember how they also ran into each other “randomly” during lunch at school near the end of the third episode? Now, they’ve “randomly” run into each other again. Except this time, we’re at a pool. Maybe they’re the Altair and Vega of the show. In fact, fuck Yuuya. Maybe Mitsuki and Yuki should the ones to get together. Oh well, this obviously can’t happen in a harem anime. What we do get, instead, is Hiyori’s obsession with Yuki’s breasts once again. They’re so blindingly big, apparently, that even Mitsuki becomes self-aware of her own lack of endowment. Oh those girls! They can’t help but be envious of each other! If we just keep insisting over and over that girls are their own biggest enemies, maybe it’ll come true in real life. But since we’re all about coincidences, Yuuya is here as well. What a coincidence!

Look at our hero and his tofu-like physique. Man, now I’m getting jealous! But don’t worry because we’ve got a perfectly good explanation for why Yuuya is here. Y’know that midget meganneko that we’ve been seeing throughout the anime? Her father owns this giant-ass water park, so she invited Yuuya and his friend to serve as a focus group for her father’s business. Why are we being told this? Hell if I know! I can understand a lot about these shows, but there’s still plenty that will forever remain a mystery to us all.

It isn’t long before Hiyori begins to whine to Mitsuki that the latter isn’t taking the opportunity to play with Yuuya. Naturally, Mitsuki is concerned about losing her pareo and exposing herself to the world. Again, why she agreed to come to a water park is beyond me. Hell, she could’ve just stuck with those daisy dukes she arrived at the park in, and they would’ve been a whole lot more secure than some silly pareo. But of course, if harem characters were actually smart, they wouldn’t be in a harem.

Still, Mitsuki is able to resist her ghost’s pleas. In fact, Hiyori tried to take over Mitsuki’s body and found that she was unable to do so. Huh, if that’s possible, why hasn’t Mitsuki been doing this all along? Oh, right, smart characters and harems don’t belong together. So moving on, Yuuya and his best friend Shotaro runs into the latter’s imouto. That’s just fantastic. We certainly don’t have enough imoutos, I’ll tell you what. And lo and behold, she’s not an adoring imouto either. What is with these girls? Don’t they know the rules of the game? It’s okay. Like in Nisekoi, we’ll tear these tsunderekkos down soon enough. All it takes is patience.

From the side, Yuuya comments that Mitsuki must be her moody self again. All of a sudden, Yuki trips and her breasts come tumbling down upon his face. This gets Mitsuki off her ass and into the pool out of concern (or jealousy?) for her brother, but in her haste, our imouto manages to hurt herself. Ah, there we go! Something to render the girl weak and helpless so that our harem lead can swoop in and save the day!

Regardless of her pleas that Yuuya should put her down, and regardless of her assurances that she’s really okay, Mitsuki finds herself being carried away into the distance. Doki doki, those cheeks are blushing with embarrassment… but ah, which cheeks? In a moment of self-awareness, the anime speaks through Shotaro: “She looks like a captured seal.” But then order is quickly restored to the universe when Mitsuki’s best friend coos, “But isn’t it nice, the way Yuuya-senpai’s carrying her?” What manliness! Ignoring a woman’s wishes is a true sign of masculinity! But of course, when Shotaro offers to carry Ayaka — I think that’s her name — she slaps him. There’s your problem right there. No, it’s not because he isn’t the harem lead. Well, that’s part of it, but the real reason she slaps him is because he even dared to ask. Y’see, it’s true that Shotaro isn’t the harem lead, because if he had been the harem lead, he would’ve just picked her up right there and then, no questions asked! That hesitation is why Shotaro is doomed to play the pathetic best friend role.

In case you’ve forgotten, however, that this show is all about Mitsuki’s humiliation, a young boy runs by giggling because he’s just found the bottoms of a bathing suit! Oh my! Whose panties could it be? Again, why Mitsuki opted to wear a string-tie bikini over an elastic one is beyond me, but intelligence… harems… y’know how it goes. Not only did she lose her bottoms, she also lost her pareo and nobody’s noticed until now! Not even the girl herself. But oh no, a pair of girls are rounding the corner and if they see Mitsuki in her chastithong, she will be so embarrassed. What are going to do! Our harem lead seizes the opportunity to make a noble sacrifice! He leans into his own sister and pretends to be making out with her, thereby causing the onlookers to run away in horror!

But don’t look away just yet. Yuuya has even more to offer. He stands back and slowly slides down his swimming trunks so that Mitsuki can wear them instead. This alone causes the poor girl to squeal out in half-pain and half-pleasure as the gauge on her chastithong fills up ever so slowly. Wait? Did she just… from that…? Welp, it’s harem anime for you. But y’know, the gauge is about 75% full now. Can we just call this already? Can we? Please? Ugh….

Since that day, Yuuya’s been fantasizing about his sister’s crotch. Such a shame… he seemed like such a wholesome lead too. Yuki interrupts his fantasy though, because she wishes to return Mitsuki’s lost bathing suit. Why didn’t she just bring them to Mitsuki? She knows where they live, after all. Hell, with all the damn coincidences floating around, she’s bound to run into the girl at some point in the day. Maybe even twice. But no, let’s give the panties to Yuuya instead so he can pull them out of the bag, unfold them, gawk at them like it’s some sort of fucking ritual. It’s onanistic, basically.

Even Yuuya is like, “Uh, why did you bring this to me instead of just taking it to her?” Yuki replies, “I thought about doing that, but she’s out sick today… So I figured it’d be best to leave it with you.” Or — and maybe I’m just crazy here — you could just hold onto the panties until the girl is no longer sick. It’s not like panties would be out of place in Yuki’s possession. But of course, had she done this instead, we wouldn’t have an awkward situation where Yuuya’s holding his own sister’s panties in his left hand. For the next minute or so, our hero continues to hold the bathing suit bottoms with a claw-like grip as if it’s a mysterious artifact of great power. Well, those panties must be powerful alright, ’cause with them now in his possession, he’s starting to hallucinate. He’s starting to wonder if his own sister is trying to come on to him.

Meanwhile, Mitsuki’s at home, killing herself with embarrassment. Even though Yuuya has seen her piss herself, apparently it is the worst thing in the world that he has now seen her in the chastithong. So in her desperation, Mitsuki attempts to cut the chastithong off with a pair of scissors. Tears are even streaming down her face, but I’m sure nobody in the audience gives a shit about that. Rather, we’re all crying on the inside because of all the fun we’ll lose out on if our heroine does manage to successfully remove the chastithong. When Hiyori tries to convince Mitsuki to refrain from this heinous offense, the latter snaps at the ghost. Mitsuki reveals that she is tired of being caught up in all this bullshit just for the ghost’s sake. And here’s where the anime gets stupid.

Like who gives a shit that Hiyori didn’t have a choice? She screwed up. She didn’t live a good life and she died. Boo-fucking-hoo. Since she’s already dead, why drag somebody else into it? But look how sad Hiyori is! We’re supposed to pity her. We’re supposed to feel sorry for her and her predicament. She just wanted to be a cute imouto unlike that gloomy, bitchy Mitsuki! In the end, Mitsuki collapses from her illness, and the gauge on the chastithong clouds up. Hiyori takes over the poor girl’s body because in this anime’s logic, there’s probably only one way to save Mitsuki’s life. Is it bed rest and cold medicine? No, it’s sexing up your brother!

Have at it!

I’m a bit lukewarm about this episode. I can see what it’s trying to accomplish, but at the same time, a large part of it is rather dull and uneventful.

Episode summary: When Yato refers to Nora as his friend with benefits, Hiyori freaks out and separates Yukine from Yato. Her reasoning is that Yato is a bad influence on the young Regalia. Eventually, the girl loses Yukine, who wanders the streets and runs into another spirit. The spirit is of a young girl waiting for her mom to pick her up. Unfortunately, Yukine tells the spirit that her mom is never coming, which causes the young girl to fall to the corruption of the Phantoms. In the end, Yato has to show up and save Yukine and Hiyori from the now corrupted spirit. On the side, a new character is introduced to the story in form of a gun-toting, lion-riding blonde. She too has a interest in Yato for some reason (don’t we all!).

Notes:

• We start off with Yato teaching his Regalia how to form a “borderline” in order to protect himself from Phantoms. When Hiyori asks if this is something she could do as well, Yato informs her that only Regalias possess this special power. That seems rather arbitrary to me. On a related note, Yukine’s tsundere act here is a little unnecessary. It adds nothing to the scene, especially since Yato didn’t even react to it. I think Yukine just ends up making himself look ridiculous.

• Again, the anime tells us that Yukine is extraordinarily powerful despite being new at this whole Regalia thing. Is there anything he’s bad at? It’s just that, so far, this makes for a bit of a flat, uninteresting character. We have to ask ourselves what Yukine’s potential means. Is it reflective of something meaningful about his character? Does he have great power because of a personality trait (this is represented as resolve in an anime like Kill la Kill) or as a result of an event in his past? For now, none of this seems to be the case. He’s just powerful because he’s powerful. Certainly, Noragami has time to rectify this, but until then, Yukine remains boringly static.

• Out of nowhere, Hiyori accuses our hero of being depraved. According to last week’s episode, it’s likely that she crush on him. So I wonder if she’s just retaliating because he called Nora a friend with benefits. I mean, honestly, what’s depraved about having ex-girlfriends and friends with benefits? This just makes Hiyori come off as rather prudish. Sure, a stable life is important for raising a child, but… uh, Yato isn’t raising a child. And it’s equally condescending and oblivious to call Yukine a perfectly good child that wouldn’t dare harbor any perverted thoughts.

• Oh yes, she is quite oblivious:

Yukine: Are you a rich girl or something?
Hiyori: Don’t be silly. I’m just an ordinary high schooler.

How often have I heard that before? Oh we’re not rich! We’re middle class just like everyone else! The middle class just happens to range from $30,000 to $300,000 a year!

• Maybe it’s just me, but Hiyori’s really coming off unlikeable in this episode. It seems like she’s stonewalling any attempts to reason with her. Anything she says or does is automatically right.

• It is rather nice to see an anime character actually have both of her parents not only alive — not only in her life — but functional as well. Hell, Hiyori’s parents look absolutely blissful to be in each other’s company, a far cry from what you might see in other series. Hm, they’re also rich, but maybe that’s just a coincidence.

• Somehow Yukine’s smell reminds Hiyori of Yato.

• Oh my god, Yukine is jealous of Nora: “It’s not like you need me.” Then he storms off like a dramatic, little bitch. What the hell am I watching?

• So to recap, Yato’s privy to Yukine’s thoughts, and if the latter ever gives into a temptation of any form, it causes pain in the former. It must suck to be a Regalia. You don’t exactly ask to be one, and not only that, you have no privacy either. I suppose this probably implies that a god’s relationship with his or her Regalia must remain strictly business. After all, wouldn’t it be considered temptation if, say, Yato and Nora are truly friends with benefits?

• According to Yato, the idea of right and wrong doesn’t apply to gods. They transcend ethics or something. That’s a little odd to me. Now, if you derive justice from the divine and the divine alone, then maybe you could perhaps argue Yato’s case here. But if you derive justice from reason, and seeing as how Yato’s a thinking entity regardless of the fact that he’s a god, it’d be silly to think that gods can transcend even that.

• I guess if Yukine ever goes too far, Yato won’t hesitate to kill him. After all, it’s rumored that he’s killed a Regalia before.

• Again, I really wish the Phantoms were actually imposing. This should’ve been a scary moment where we see the despairing spirit of a young girl get lured away into the dark. Unfortunately, the Phantoms are just too comical in their depiction, and this completely takes me out of the moment.

• Well, for what it’s worth, we revisit the idea that hope is not only powerful, but it keeps us from destroying ourselves. The spirit of the young girl has always managed to avoid the numerous Phantoms she comes across because she’s held onto her hope. Y’know what? The better word to use here is actually ‘faith.’ The young girl has always had faith in her mother. She has faith that her mother will pick her up one day. Obviously, the viewer knows that this will sadly never happen, but what the little girl believes isn’t, according to the anime, as important as what that belief can do for her. And as we can plainly see, faith protects us from corruption. When Yukine tells the girl that he doesn’t think her mother will ever come, this is how she lost her innocence.

We don’t explicitly see it, but I would venture a guess that, all of a sudden, she becomes acutely aware of her mortality or lack thereof. The little girl pretty much loses her bearings. Everything, from her sense of self-preservation to right and wrong, goes flying out the window because she now realizes that she is no longer alive. And once those humanly concerns are gone, there is nothing left within her but a powerful yearning for her mother. And unfortunately, this powerful yearning needs to be quelled — fulfilled, even — at any cost. In her desperation, the spirit of the young girl allows herself to be tricked by the Phantoms into thinking that they can lead her to her mother.

She becomes corrupted as a result — a rather sad development. In the bigger picture, in a story about gods struggling to remain relevant in the modern day, it’s only fitting that the idea of faith holds such importance. We also can’t forget how this entire episode has been about Hiyori and Yukine’s lack of faith in Yato. They don’t believe he can take care of the latter, but it’s evident that Yukine could have turned out much like the spirit of the young girl without Yato’s protection.

• I don’t think any of us expected otherwise, but it’s worth nothing anyway that, according to Yato, the spirit of the young girl is beyond saving. She’s lost her sense of self as a result of her loss of faith.

• So what are we to make of this entire episode? What was the point in seeing Yukine spend a boring day or two with Hiyori? I mean, the characterization here is sort of weak so what is purpose in separating Yato from his Regalia? I think an interesting contrast can be drawn. Although life with Yato is harsh, brutish and difficult, Yato gives Yukine a sense of purpose. Had he not become Yato’s Regalia, Yukine would’ve just been one of the many wayward spirits wandering the streets of Japan. Not only that, he stands the risk of corruption, either through temptation or at the hands of malevolent Phantoms. With Hiyori, Yukine obviously has a much more comfortable life, but it is also a life without meaning. As a result, he gets bored easily and his mind wanders more often. An idle mind then lends itself to temptation. To put this all into perspective, a wayward spirit is a freeter. Work gives us meaning in life, and even though Yato is poor and destitute, he essentially gives Yukine a job. When we have nothing to do, that’s when we stand the risk of falling to our vices. Hiyori may have the best of intentions for Yukine, but she can’t exactly put him to work. Even though she can provide for kid — even though she can just buy anything he wants like a skateboard — it doesn’t provide Yukine with that sense of accomplishment that he can find through work as Yato’s Regalia.

So much real talk.

* * * * *

Nobunaga the Fool Ep. 5

Episode summary: Nobunaga insists on using his War Armor to launch a pre-emptive attack on Takeda, but Nobuhide continues to resist. After learning how to activate his Regalia, our hero decides to jump straight into battle anyway. Unfortunately, he’s been poisoned just as he’s about to hop into his War Armor. When news of the advancing Takeda forces reach the castle, an unconscious Nobunaga forces Nobuhide to join the fray. When our protagonist finally wakes up, Mitsuhide reveals he had been behind the “assassination” attempt all along. He wanted to prevent Nobunaga’s enemies from attacking his lord during the heat of battle. Plus, now’s Nobunaga’s chance to rejoin the battle and end up being the savior.

And this is exactly what Nobunaga does, but his duel with Shingen is interrupted when Caesar emerges from the Rhine River some dinky river and announces his intent to help Shingen. Despite this, he’s really only interested in Ichihime, so Caesar begins to charge towards the castle. Seeing this, the now injured Nobuhide throws himself in Caesar’s path, but ends up having his war armor impaled through the chest by his foe’s weapon. Nobunaga then goes berserk, forcing both Caesar and Shingen to retreat for now. The following morning, a dying Nobuhide says his parting words to his troubled son, then passes away. The episode closes with Nobunaga swearing to get his revenge on Caesar.

Thoughts: In the end, it’s all rather convenient how everything played out. The ol’ fuddy-duddy Nobuhide gets to redeem himself in his son’s eyes. Yes, he died as a result, but dying on the battlefield is probably considered a poetic ending to a warrior’s life. Plus, his character arc is complete so the narrative has no use for him anymore. He may as well die to add some pathos to the story! Meanwhile, our Fool now has a noble cause to hide his bloodthristy, warmongering actions behind. He just wants to avenge his father, after all. With that settled, let’s talk about something else instead.

Usually, when you think of your loved ones, memories come flooding into your mind’s eye. Why? Because we normally wouldn’t love someone unless we’ve spent a lot of time with them. Well, that’s the theory anyway. When Himiko thinks of her loved one, a.k.a. the Fool, she has only one goddamn memory on repeat: the one time he picked her up over his head when they were children. Ah, true love. But y’know, since this anime is so incredibly macho, I feel as though we haven’t shined enough of a spotlight on any of our heroines. Let’s us thus take the opportunity to do just that!

So we’ve got ourselves three major female characters in this anime. First, Ichihime, Nobunaga’s sister, is like… femininity defined or some nonsense like that. She’s so feminine that everything about her is pink. Her clothing is pink. Even her hair is pink. But more importantly, she’s so feminine that she’s literally a caged bird. In other words, all she does is wander the palace grounds until she can no longer fight the urge to belt out some crappy song that people will undoubtedly consider the most beautiful sound they’ve ever heard. What she does with the rest of her time, nobody knows. Some say she’s still singing to this day.

Next, it’s our sex-crazed loli from the Yamatai kingdom. Oh boy, sex-crazed! We know how she spends her days: sit around pining for Nobunaga’s impressive blade. It is the height of lunacy that he hasn’t bedded her already. And like any insecure women in anime, Himiko targets her flat chest as the culprit. Of course, what virile, red-blooded Japanese warrior wouldn’t want to sheath his uchigatana in this:

But like a dog chasing a car, what would actually happen if Himiko ever managed to consummate her betrothal? How would the rest of her days play out? Like the female enka singer, her job is to pine. If she ever stops pining, all that awaits is character death.

Last but not least, we have the buxomy blonde from the West: Jeanne. At one point in this episode, we cut to a short scene of Jeanne practicing her calligraphy. Out of nowhere, she starts thinking about Nobunaga and how he’s now married to Himiko. Then the scene ends. Yep. That’s it. In the early stages of the episode, our heroine — arguably our main heroine — has nothing to contribute to the story other than that she’s so jealous… but she doesn’t even know why she’s jealous. She has yet to be honest about her ~true feelings~ for Nobunaga. Ah, Jeanne, Jeanne, Jeanne… you’ve turned in quite a burning performance. What a true maiden you are!

Granted, she did rush into battle when Nobunaga was in trouble. I blame this uncouth disregard for her femininity on that ridiculous getup she wears. That’s what happens when you allow women to wear the pants! She starts to think she can actually play a pivotal role in the story and everything! Luckily, all she did was ram her War Armor into Lord Shingen. Like a perfect alley oop, Jeanne helps our Fool throw down a massive dunk on his enemy. Thank goodness she didn’t more than that lest we begin to forget who the real man hero of the story is.

Well, I hope this has been an eye-opener to my readers. As you watch the Fool and his manly exploits, please don’t lose sight of some of the scintillating supporting characters behind him! They sing! They pine! They furrow their brows with frustration for they know not what this tightness of the bosom whenever the Fool is around means! I mean, just look at them now as Nobunaga is busy fighting off an Takeda’s invading army:

Such dynamic roles…

* * * * *

Nobunagun Ep. 5

Episode summary: The Commander (does she even have a name?) assigns Shio to the Second Platoon so she gets to join some familiar faces, i.e. Jack, Newton, Gandhi, etc. Aboard her new home, the “Alex Logan” stronghold, Shio gets teased by Gandhi and tongue-raped by Newton. Later on, she goes on a quick mission to help her team secure a Messenger class Invasion Object. Our heroes manage to confirm their worst fears: the enemy is evolving fast.

Thoughts: Yes, I’m still watching this show. Mostly out of morbid curiosity, to be honest. Apparently when Newton isn’t in battle, she feels the need to french kiss every single person she meets. Poor Isaac is rolling around in his grave somewhere. The silliest thing is how everyone just allows it to happen despite their protestations. Meanwhile, we’re introduced to both Vidocq and Hunter, but neither of their depictions are particularly interesting enough to talk about. If you’ve guessed that Vidocq sits in a microscope-shaped wheelchair, congratulations for you are correct! You win, uh, the soundtrack to Nobunagun, a.k.a. a bunch of songs from an 8-bit synthesizer because who doesn’t love being serenaded by their Nintendo?

Anyway, the action makes up about only a quarter of this week’s episode so it’s over before it even started. And while other shows might try to pretty up their conflict with metaphor and allusions, what you see here is pretty much what you get. Aliens are bad. Kill aliens. Watch out. Here are more aliens.

* * * * *

Wizard Barristers Ep. 4

Episode summary: Quinn and Shizumu subdue Rei, a serial killer notorious for the murder of fifteen wizards. His brother Tsukuji now comes to Butterfly Law Offices to seek their help in defending Rei. He convinces the ladies that his brother suffers from dissociative identity disorder, and as such, Rei cannot be held accountable for his crimes. Cecil shares her misgivings about the case, but Ageha scolds our heroine for her reluctance. In the end, they manage to reduce Rei’s sentence down to life in prison, but Cecil remains unconvinced about her client’s psychiatric disorder. When she goes to confront Tsukuji about it, he reveals that both he and his brothers are equally responsible for the murders, and now they have their sights set on Cecil. Everyone comes out of the woodwork to save her, but Cecil actually needs no saving as she awakens to yet another power: sand magic. She then uses it to subdue Tsukuji and all’s well that ends well… but it turns out Shizumu is the one behind the twin brothers’ actions.

Thoughts: Y’know, I think I would’ve preferred it if Cecil had been wrong about Rei in the end. It would have been a good lesson for her to learn, and that lesson is that everyone deserves a fair trial regardless of who they are or what they do. To go even further, everyone has rights regardless of who they are or what they do. Yes, she might not like defending an unrepentant murderer, but it’s her job to uphold their rights. She doesn’t have to win the case to the extent that the murderer gets to walk free. We’re not talking about O.J. Simpson here. All she has to do is make sure no one’s rights are being violated. I mean, she would want the same for her mother, wouldn’t she? How would she feel if a wizard barrister had turned down her mother’s case because he or she doesn’t feel comfortable with defending an accused murderer? And had Rei truly have DID, then he doesn’t actually deserve a death penalty.

But in the end, Cecil’s suspicions were right all along so she doesn’t actually have to take any hard lessons to heart. I dunno… I just feel like her character is slowly becoming a little too Mary Sue-ish. Not only is she correct in her assessment of Rei, she keeps gaining powers. She’s going to become Wizard Genius at this rate. Like what was the point of her friends showing up to save her anyway when she actually ended up saving them instead? Oh well… it’s just that flaws are what makes us human. I know they have magic powers, but at their core, these characters are still human above everything else. And there’s nothing wrong with a young prodigy not exactly having all the answers. Yes, I know she had to be right in order for the narrative to reveal the conspiracy behind the scenes, i.e. Shizumu taking an interest in Cecil’s awakening powers. Still, my point stands: Cecil is perfect week in and week out. She can do no wrong, and frankly, that makes her kind of boring.

I’ll admit the second half of this episode is okay. Having said that, onto the summary and notes.

Episode summary: Kal and Claire get a little bit closer during a camp out on the beach. We then learn of the girl’s origin, and she’s had a tough life — probably much tougher than Kal’s. Afterwards, she tries to avoid Kal because she’s afraid that he’s truly Karl La Hire, but during a training exercise, he reaffirms his implicit love for her. As a result, she too embraces their relationship and the duo successfully defeat their opponents in the exercise. But before they get the chance to celebrate, the Sky Clan of the Holy Spring preemptively attacks Isla and our couple find themselves caught in the crossfire.

Notes:

• If you’re chomping at the bit to find out how the revelation about Claire and Nina Viento will impact the story, sorry! ‘Cause we starting things off with everyone gathered around a tree in order to attach a swing to it. Wow, such rowdy kids! Don’t get too wild out there, guys. Wouldn’t want anyone to get hurt!

• Kal can now hit a giant, stationary target with his rifle. Good for him. It’s just one scene from a long montage of how everyone’s doing at flight school, and we all know how exciting montages are.

• Ooh, ground combat is important. What’s next? Water training? Hm, could be interesting. They are surrounded by water, after all. Let’s see how the anime handles it:

A goddamn beach episode. Ugh…

• Bandereas is not to be outdone. He, too, is ready to strip down to nothing but a speedo before his students:

How can you possibly fail in life when you’ve got such amazing role models to look up to?

• But of course, while most of the guys will happily gawk at Sonia’s body, most of the girls are busy averting their eyes at the sight of Bandereas. In other words, boys will be boys and girls hate sex! Generalizations are cool!

• To the anime’s credit, they’re still just training… for now. I obviously don’t have high hopes for this show, but I’ll call it like I see it.

• I spoke too soon: “Once in a while, you guys should also get a chance to relax! Anyone who wants to stay and have fun is welcome to do so.” Hey, I’ve got nothing against fun, but a beach episode in an anime about pilots, violent revolutions, revenge, and exploring the world? C’mon. You’re breaking my balls, Smalls.

• And don’t think I’ve forgotten about the Nina Viento revelation… the Nina Viento revelation. C’mooooooooon. What are we doing here? Why aren’t we continuing the story? It’s like the anime’s saying, “Good job. You guys have endured all this hard, strenuous stuff like… plot and character development. Time to take a break and have fun with a beach episode! Ha ha ha ha ha ha! HA HA!”

• Claire’s hesitant to play in the water with her friends because of her curfew. Yes, Claire, yes! Ignore these ignoramuses. Return to your Nina Viento self! And together, we will advance the story! I mean, uh, you will advance the story. I’ll just be watching. Just do it.

• Goddammit:

• Even the upper class kids are forced to leave lest they ruin our super awesome fun beach episode. Wouldn’t want that! We deserve this, after all. All those flashbacks were tough to sit through! It was like I was learning things important to the story and shit. I’m so tired of Kal’s whiny ass bitching about how his parents were executed before his eyes. Man up and get over it, am I right? God, what a chore. Let’s just watch girls in bathing suits splash water at each other instead. Aah, this show has finally achieved anime equilibrium.

• This is not very befitting of a priestess, young lady:

That old governess was right! Should’ve never let Claire go to school! Now her boobs are all flopping all over the place. Such lack of grace.

• You might think Ignacio would be a total bro and do his best to advance the story, but nope. He too gets dragged into all the nonsense thanks to Ari. So in the very next scene, he’s stuck peeling a potato. That’s what you get, son.

• But yes, now we get a scintillating scene of a campfire cookout. My heart is practically beating itself out of my chest.

• Meanwhile, our hero and his girl are busy gathering bundles of sticks. Well, all I know is that Kal has twice the bundle of sticks that Claire has. That’s saying something!

• Whoops. It turns out our lovey-dovey, soon-to-be-having-hate-sex couple is lost in the woods. Thank god for those bundles of sticks though…

• Kal: “L-let’s get back to everyone! Or we’ll get stranded again.” Yes, in order to not be lost, you should simply “unlose” yourself. It’s so simple.

• They trip and fall, and of course, our hero ends up being on top of the girl. No sexy water to break their fall this time though like in the first episode.

• Will they…?

Naw, no way… anime always chickens out. But maybe….

• Nope:

Maybe the RA knows all about Claire’s true identity, and it’s her job to make sure nothing inappropriate happens between the deposed prince and the Wind Priestess. Or maybe I’m just giving the anime too much credit and the RA’s only here because she’s a creepy stalker.

• RA: “Every day, I walk around the lake in the evening.” Oh okay.

• After Kal helps Claire up to her feet, the girl suddenly runs away with her head down. I swear, anime guys have no instincts whatsoever. The girl you love looks to be in distress? Just stand there and mutter her name!

• Ooh, so now we get some juicy revelations. The new Balsteros government is keenly aware of Karl La Hire’s continued existence. They’re not going to kill him or anything, but a government official suggests that Kal take part in the Isla Project, a.k.a. let’s go look for the End of the World. Kal’s foster father correctly deduces that this is nothing more than a voluntary exile. Nevertheless, the pitch wins Kal over when the official reveals that Nina Viento will be serving as governor of Isla as it takes to the skies. Obviously, the new government isn’t stupid; it guesses correctly that Kal wants revenge. As a result, the government is willingly betraying Nina Viento, a key figure in the Wind Revolution. Why might that be?

• Kal’s foster father can’t be stupid either. He has to know deep down what Kal aims to accomplish on Isla. It’s not like Kal’s going to have a picnic with Nina Viento as they hash out their differences. Still, the old man allows Ari to join her foster brother on Isla. I wonder why.

• Now that Kal’s found love on Isla though, he’s naturally unsure of what he wants to do anymore. Even if he’s successful in getting his revenge on Nina Viento, it’s unlikely that he’d survive the ordeal. And even if he does survive, where would he go? Where could he hide?

• Hm, the same universe that has technology like “hydrogen battery packs” still requires its pilots to shoot from a handheld rifle when airborne. That’s just a little silly to me.

• I guess it’s Nina’s turn to have flashbacks.

• So she grew up being called a witch due to her abilities to control the wind. Not only that, her poor mother reluctantly gave her away to settle some debt. I’m guessing Luis de Alarcon isn’t her actual uncle, but then why is he so personally invested in the idea of her attending flight school?

• So the girl uses her powers to summon a tornado that ends up devastating her village. Somehow, a nearby priest had been observing the whole ordeal, and he just nonchalantly saunters up to the poor girl. He begins to proselytize about Saint Aldista as he aims to recruit Claire at her most vulnerable state. It’s like the whole thing was planned from the start…

• According to Nina, “The Empire was already a single step from destruction. The people sought salvation.” But I want to know why. What crimes were Karl’s parents guilty of? In the flashbacks for both of our main characters, the Wind Revolution itself is merely touched upon. Why do I want to know about the causes of the Wind Revolution so badly? ‘Cause Nina basically lost her powers when she gazed into young Karl’s eyes: “…I realized what a sinner I am.” But is she truly a sinner? If she had helped to overthrow a corrupt monarchy, what is she truly guilty of? Sure, the resulting government is probably not sunshine and flowers, but sticking with the old status quo isn’t likely the solution either. So why is Nina a sinner? Don’t tell me it’s because she’s responsible for the death of Karl’s parents. That’s obvious; that’s just surface detail. Give me more than that. What is the true extent of her guilt? Did she end up helping to overthrow a benevolent monarchy instead or what?

• Luis asks that she accompany him on Isla, but we still don’t know why he wants her there. I just hope we don’t have to sit through more beach episodes before we discover his true intentions.

• The following day, Claire begins to see the image of young Karl every time she looks at Kal. So now, she’s avoiding him at all costs.

• Claire half-confesses to Kal, “I want to stay who I am…” Is this entire trip an attempt to help the girl regain her powers? Maybe she’s supposed to wash away her sins at some point in the trip or something and this will allow her to command the wind again. Makes you wonder, then, if Luis truly cares for her or if she’s just someone he intends to manipulate.

• Out of nowhere, the Sky Clan, Guardians of the Holy Spring, attacks Isla. One of Isla’s leaders refers to them as nothing more than “mere barbarians time has left behind.” See, the show’s universe is potentially interesting. What are these places and these people who defend them?

• If time has left these guys behind, time sure was generous enough to let them have some nice airplanes too. If anything, Isla’s arsenal is the one that looks kinda rickety here.

• I’m surprised the leaders hadn’t planned for this contingency. I mean, yeah, they thought the Sky Clan was nothing more than a myth, but still, why would you approach a revered and holy place without thinking that you might run into trouble? What revered, holy place isn’t rife with conflict.

You wouldn’t want her to lose an arm and a leg, would you?

Episode summary: The crew takes advantage of its downtime to haze poor Aoba, forcing him to scrub toilets and such. In the middle of one of his chores, our hero spots Fiona attempting to make her way aboard Cygnus in order to reunite with her brother. After sneaking her onto the ship, Zogilia forces attack out of nowhere. Fiona hastily gives her brother words of encouragement before he and Aoba has to fly off to defend the base from their enemies. Sensing that it’s a losing battle, Cygnus’s commander decides to cut their losses short and abandon Chitose Base. Although our heroes do manage to make their escape, the Chitose Base falls to Zogilia.

Notes:

• Zogilia has the most awkward salute in the world as every member of its army must continually fist his or her own chest even as they’re walking down a hallway:

No wonder they’re the bad guys. In any case, this entire scene’s purpose is to inform us that Zogilia is about to launch an attack. Yep, that’s it. Scene’s over. Time to move on.

• Back at Chitose, Aoba is staring at Dio lovingly from a distance. Oh how his heart aches in anticipation of their next Coupling…

• Oh hey, Aoba’s military training starts today. In response, our hero can only utter a grunt. I wonder if he realizes what he’s just gotten himself into. He’s in a war now. He’s going to have to kill people. How do you go from playing basketball with your friends during school to becoming a soldier fighting in a world war without even losing your lunch? Guess Aoba’s just tougher than we all thought.

• Unfortunately, there is no training. The crew’s just going to haze the rookie. Y’know, make Aoba do stuff like scrubbing the poop deck, cleaning toilets, peeling potatoes, etc. Either our hero already knows exactly what it takes to be a soldier, or the Alliance is a laughable ragtag crew of wannabe peacekeepers. Eh, a little bit of column A, a little bit of column B… It’s just amazing to me that for how much I mock The Pilot’s Love Song, that damn anime has actually done more to prepare its characters for the grim realities of war than Buddy Complex. For example, let’s say Aoba gets shot out of the sky one day. It could happen. So he’s going to have to hoof it on the ground, and he might even come across some enemy combatants as a result. Is he proficient in close quarters combat? Can he hike long distances while carrying a heavy pack of critical supplies? Does he have any wilderness training? Can he operate a firearm? Shouldn’t a soldier need to know any of this stuff?

• We pause for a brief second to find out that Hina is no longer being detained. Just a brief second though…

…because we gotta get right back to Aoba and his wacky cleaning hijinks!

• In the distance, Aoba spies Dio’s sister Fiona. She’s attempting to board the Alliance ship to presumably see her brother. What ever happened to using email or some other form of instantaneous electronic communication? You’d think seventy plus years into the future people wouldn’t have to meet each other face-to-face in order to have a conversation. Of course, face-to-face conversations will always trump, say, a text message, but the anime makes it seem as though Dio and Fiona haven’t actually talked to each other for long, long time. Maybe the internet doesn’t exist in the world of Buddy Complex.

• Here’s tragic backstory time! Dio was forced to retreat from the defense of some city, the same city that housed both his mother and his precious imouto. And of course, the mother bites it ’cause who the hell cares about her! The imouto though… well, as you can probably tell, a crippled imouto is the height of mecha fashion. In the end, I’d say Dio came out ahead on that front. So despite the fact that the Weinberg family looks to be incredibly wealthy and influential — hell, this is what we’ve been told in last week’s episode — the mother and daughter couldn’t manage to evacuate the city in time. And not only that, the patriarch of the family puts all of the blame on Dio even though his son was hardly a high-ranking soldier at the time. Y’know, the type that can actually issue orders to attack or retreat. It’s almost as if this backstory is… contrived… naaah, anime would never toy with our heart strings like that.

• No wonder nobody’s winning this war. As I’ve already said, Zogilia is busy fisting itself and detaining its most talented soldiers just for arousing suspicion. Meanwhile, a disabled imouto and her maid can sneak aboard an Alliance ship by simply having Aoba fake a stomach illness. Fan-fucking-tasting work, gentlemen.

Gee, I wonder!

• But Aoba explains, “You shouldn’t have to get permission to see your own family.” Well why don’t we just have one giant “Bring your family to the military base” day then! To hell with the classified information we have onboard the ship! The special Coupling mechas that might just turn the tides of this war? Eh, if we can’t even entrust such secrets to our very own family members, then we’ve already lost the war…no, not that war, my friends. I mean here…

No, this is not a Buddy Complex-related screenshot.

…the war in our hearts.

• By the way, this is why I’ve been saying that Aoba needs actual training. Y’know, get him up to speed on military protocols and not scrubbing toilets?

• But of course, no one’s even mad. When Aoba and Dio’s imouto reach the bridge, they merely stumble onto Aoba’s welcoming party. Wow, if I had known the army was like this, I would’ve enlisted years ago! Hell, I’ll join right now! Who do I talk to!

When do I get my cake and confetti! It’s just tradition, y’all.

• Oh no! Before Dio can even make it to the party, Zogilia forces have invaded the Sea of Japan! Welp, at least Fiona’s here where we can protect her! Wouldn’t want her to lose her arms too. Then what will she even do with her life? Join the cast of an eroge, I guess.

• Cygnus’s crew is reluctant to join the battle because the Coupling System is still supposed to be top secret. Is it? Really? After all that’s happened, do we really think Zogilia is still in the dark about the Coupling System? They’ve only lost to it, oh I dunno, three times now? Oh, I forgot. No one has email. They can’t actually message each other about the losses they’ve suffered. Even the Invasion Objects from Nobunagun have more military coordination than our villains here.

• Y’know, I was joking about Fiona being on the ship so that Dio can protect her. Y’know that, right? So what the hell is she still doing here?

In fact, the damn commander is right behind her. What is he doing? Has it occurred to him that a disabled little girl is on his bridge? Oh my bad, she has something really important to say, guys! Shh, shh.

• If Dio’s done nothing wrong, then why do you feel the need to say “I will always forgive you.” What is there to forgive if he’s blameless?

• Oh by the way, if you haven’t noticed, she never actually gets to see Dio in person. All she ends up doing is talk to him over what basically amounts to a webcam. Couldn’t she have done this before? Couldn’t she have sent him a message somehow to tell him that she doesn’t blame him for their mother’s death? Oh right, right, the internet doesn’t exist.

• Oh okay, now she’ll leave. But look at the determined look on Dio’s face now. That’s the magical power of disabled imoutos, everybody! If she had been blind too, who knows what would have happened instead? Dio might have gained the ability to mind control people or something. I’m just kidding; that’d just be stupid.

• But before Cygnus’s Valiancers can take off and support the rest of their fleet at Otaru Base, Zogilia’s Valiancers are already here at Chitose.

Can’t let you do that, Star Fox.

• I sure hope Mr. “I can only fire twice before having to recharge” has come up with some new strategies though. Last I remember, they didn’t fare so well against the Coupling System.

• Hina goes straight for Aoba. Someone’s jealous.

• Can the pilots from two different sides actually talk to each other? I can’t really tell. Even though Aoba and Hina are yelling things at each other, their words don’t seem to be connected whatsoever. So maybe they’re just yelling… futilely.

• Cygnus is being pincered, but it’s okay, because the good guys’ bag of tricks is always full.

• “But Hina…!” Now repeat this like a billion times and you’ve got the extent of Aoba’s lines in the latter half of this episode. He still thinks the Hina he sees here is the same Hina he met at the start of the series. I mean, I don’t even know what to say. It’s a good thing he came to the future and joined an army, ’cause this boy ain’t getting into a college with that brain.

• So basically, the good guys’ new trick is to have the Coupling mechas fly back-to-back and form one spectacular spearhead… then just ram yourself down the enemy’s throat:

This makeshift spearhead is then somehow able to block all incoming enemy fire. Yep.

• I guess the one bright side here is that the anime doesn’t feel the need to explain to its audience what the Coupling mechas are doing. But still, that doesn’t cancel out the fact that this maneuver looks completely retarded. Two mechas flying back-to-back is your secret weapon? Really?

• Also, I learned that if the enemy is firing its lasers at you, simply fire your lasers into the ocean below in order to form a barrier that will protect your ship 100%:

Yep. Sounds legit. About as legit as the back-to-back Coupling mechas.

• And just like that, Cygnus manages to escape. Dio’s done it, guys! He protected his imouto!

Just some quick thoughts on two shows before we hit the big day of the week.

Hamatora Ep. 5

Episode summary: Everyone — including the girls — ends up at an onsen for various reasons. Out of nowhere, a homosexual gang raids the place, but they’re only interested in men so the girls are free to go. But the real reason they’re here is because their leader wishes to mind control the prince of some made-up nation (yeah, he just happens to be at the onsen). Why? He wants to use the prince’s political clout to pressure Japan into reinstating a disgraced male idol… yeah. For some reason, the girls feel insulted by the fact that they’re not desired by gay men, so they stick around. Meanwhile, the guys confront this week’s villain, but are foiled because he has the Minimum of seduction! How it works is that our villain’ll do situps until the sweat off of his abs combines with the steam of the onsen, creating an intoxicating mixture that can seduce any man. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work on women. So with our heroes rendered impotent, it falls upon the heroines’ shoulders to finish the job. At the end of the episode, Gasquet stabs a researcher for some reason or other.

Thoughts: All in all, a stupid episode. When the girls finally stumble upon the culprit, one of them goes, “So this is your keikaku~…” And she keeps talking, and talking, and talking, and talking… such masterful storytelling leaves me in awe. The thing is that I’m never going to find Hamatora funny; its humor just falls flat each and every single time. But still, this could’ve been a useful episode. Initially, I was like, “Oh good, the girls get to have the spotlight for once.” Hell, Hajime actually gets to be useful in this week’s episode. Granted, it’s only because food is on the line, but hey, she’s doing something besides constantly stuffing her face on someone else’s dime. Unfortunately, the girls get to be the stars of a joke episode and not even the ha-ha kind. And ultimately, our heroines are only able to solve the case in the first place because they refused to be chased out by the gang: “Well, if we’d let ourselves get chased out, wouldn’t you feel like a loser?” Then another girl chimes in, “…I feel like we’ve been treated unfairly as women.” Yes, what an insult that you’re not universally desired by all men. Haha, so funny. Top drawer, Hamatora.

Inari, Konkon, Koi Iroha Ep. 4

Episode summary: It’s the day of some festival so Inari gets all dressed up in a yukata along with Akemi. Our heroine eventually ends up spending quality one-on-one time with Koji. As for Akemi, she develops a crush for Keiko, but she doesn’t quite have Inari’s luck. Meanwhile, Touka continues to be suspicious of Uka’s relationship with his sister, but Uka lies to him to avoid creating trouble. Toshi then warns her about the dangers of becoming friends with humans.

Thoughts: Going to depart a bit from how I usually convey my thoughts on this anime.

• It’s funny to me that Touka is this tall and handsome bishie but his dad looks like an otaku. Obviously, this is nothing more than wish fulfillment for the anime’s target audience. Still, I sure hope they realize that Touka will likely end up looking like his father one day or they’ll be in for a terrible surprise.

• It turns out Akemi has a thing for Keiko. I’ll just repeat what I said earlier on Twitter: I’d be more down with same sex couples in anime if they weren’t often treated in such a fetishistic way for the sake of straight viewers.

• I still find myself chuckling from time to time when I watch this show. It isn’t gut-bustingly funny, sure, but it’s good enough without having all of the other… sordid trappings one comes to expect from anime. In any case, it seems like everyone and their mothers — and I mean literally their mothers as well — has caught on to the fact that our heroine has a crush on Koji except, well, Koji.

• I find the shoujo practice of wrist-grabbing somewhat bothersome. It doesn’t help either when it’s accompanied by a loud, clapping sound. Nothing spells romance like being led around like a child, huh? Why not just cut out the middleman and have the guy grab her hand in the first place? Inari, Konkon, Koi Iroha can’t even hide behind embarrassment as an excuse because this is what our main couple literally do in the very next scene.

• Touka’s voice acting is still as terrible as ever.

• Despite the semi-rapist undertones inherent in his character, Toshi’s making some sense here: an immortal being like Uka is just setting herself up for heartbreak if she gets too attached to humans. But then again, there’s something very poetic about the short-lived realities of mortal love. Because time is so fleeting for humans, it’s beautiful that we can nevertheless forge powerful, touching relationships. The fire may not burn for very long, but for the brief moment that it dances in your vision, it’ll be one of the most captivating spectacle that you’ll ever see. Cheesy, I know, but still… my point is that for Uka — and this is someone whose idea of romance has been limited to self-serving courters, a perverted brother, and the static, on-rails nature of dating simulations — developing a genuine connection with Inari may very well be worth the future heartbreak that will inevitably come when her human friend passes away.

…round of applause, everybody. Round of applause. Okay, that’s good enough. By the way, I jot these notes down as I’m watching the show for the first time. So of course, what I write at the beginning of the post is not informed by what ends up happening by the end of the episode. With that said, let’s get to the analysis.

Episode summary: At the Culture and Sports Grand Festival, Ragyo intends to sacrifice everyone in attendance in order to awaken the Life Fibers. Ryuuko and friends arrive to stop her nefarious schemes, but they are shocked when Satsuki turns against her own mother.

Notes & analysis:

• Just to reinforce the idea that Life Fibers aren’t necessarily evil, Senketsu requests that Ryuuko put him on so that she doesn’t get a cold. So y’see, I still don’t buy this “Life Fibers are an alien parasite” theory that Aikuro and Tsumugu are advancing. It just seems too simple. Plus, their words are telling: “Playing at being friends with clothing again, huh?” Nudist Beach are extremists, basically; they can’t even entertain the thought that a sentient garment composed of Life Fibers can even care for its wearer. But of course, whose fault is that? We know so relatively little of Ryuuko’s father. What was Matoi Isshin like? What were his actual aims? Once someone has passed away, it becomes all too easy to mythologize their deeds and actions without actually examining their true character. I won’t quite say the late scientist indoctrinated Nudist Beach with this idea that all Life Fibers are evil, but our anti-clothing guerrilla force must have gotten the wrong idea from somewhere. Having said that, watching the kids play and horse around — and Mako and Ryuuko are just kids from a certain perspective — is enough to make Tsumugu back down.

• If the “Life Fibers = atomic bombs” parallels haven’t quite touched home yet, it should now: “This is the result of the power of Life Fibers.”

Compare the above screenshot with this:

And don’t forget this as well:

The only thing that would’ve made the parallels more obvious is if Satsuki had attacked Hiroshima and Nagasaki instead of Osaka, Kobe, and Kyoto, but that would have been too on the nose.

• What Kill la Kill is missing, however, is the human element to this carnage and destruction. We can plainly see that locations have been devastated. We can plainly see that buildings are in ruins. But where’s the powerful human element that can elicit true outrage?

Of course, it is no accident that the human toll has been left out of the picture. For whatever reason, Trigger doesn’t want us to see the amount of blood that’s been shed. In the end, the result is that the implied atrocities of the events are undermined. Instead, we’re made to think that this is all just a bunch of war games between kids. Still, don’t take this as necessarily a flaw of the narrative. Like I’ve said, Trigger is holding back and perhaps they have a good reason for doing so. At one point, Ryuuko confesses her fears to Senketsu: “It’s like, something that was just a brawl turned into some grand battle full of crazy crap I don’t understand like the fate of humanity and the extinction of the species or whatever.” In other words, she can’t quite accept how much things have escalated. At first, this journey of hers was nothing more than a personal vendetta: all she initially wanted to do was to settle some score on the school playground. Now, things are getting heavy, but the problem is that our heroine’s mental state hasn’t quite prepared itself for the sudden raising of the stakes.

So again, why is the human toll missing? Is it possibly due to the fact that Ryuuko herself is unable to see the human toll? By this, I am suggesting that she can’t even conceptualize the idea of people losing their lives much less accept it. That up until now, everything has been rather game-like, i.e. Ryuuko defeating all her opponents in a progression as if they were video game bosses. As a result, she has blind spots. The reality hasn’t hit home. Yes, she can see the broken, toppled buildings and the upheaved concrete, but where are the bodies? The answer: they’re out there but we just can’t see them from our heroine’s perspective. She’s still just a child; she isn’t mentally prepared to accept the horrors of war. Unlike Gen, Ryuuko still has her innocence. As such, there’s resistance when the Real attempts to intrude upon her Symbolic Order: “‘I don’t give a crap about that!’ That’s what I really wanted to say.”

• So Aikuro reveals to Ryuuko that Senketsu has been spliced with her DNA. What are the implications here? First, I suppose, let’s revisit the contrast between our heroine and Satsuki, i.e. perhaps this is why Ryuuko synchronizes with Senketsu instead of overriding him. After all, Senketsu has a part of Ryuuko within him, but not just any part. Senketsu literally contains the building blocks to Ryuuko herself. All that’s missing, of course, are Ryuuko’s memories, which I think we can safely say isn’t genetically determined. So in a way, Senketsu could be considered Ryuuko’s twin. As such, like some sort of DBZ-esque fusion dance, our heroine and her Godrobe join together to become the perfect fighting machine. But can we say the same of Satsuki and Junketsu? Why is it that Satsuki can wear her Godrobe anyway? Has Junketsu also been spliced with Satsuki’s DNA? We don’t know the answer to this yet — and we may never know — but it would make perfect sense if turns out to be the case that Junketsu contains none of its Satsuki’s DNA. They are thus two completely different creatures, and as a result, Satsuki has to override Junketsu. But just you guys wait. It’ll suddenly be revealed that Junketsu contains Satsuki’s DNA after all and my elegant theory goes flying out the window.

• Still, is this a hint at the story’s potential endgame? As I’ve previously stated over and over, I don’t think the solution to the Life Fibers is to completely eradicate them. After all, Ryuuko and Senketsu is a shining example that a symbiotic relationship between a human and Life Fibers isn’t out of the question. So might we see the sort of ending where humans and Life Fibers merge to become a whole new species entirely? Y’know, like one of those crappy endings we got from the Mass Effect trilogy. Well, maybe we won’t go that far. In any case, Aikuro also reveals that, in the end, Isshin’s ultimate goal was to protect Ryuuko. Perhaps the key to protecting mankind from the Life Fibers’ potentially parasitic nature is to become one with them.

• We are reminded that Junketsu is meant to be Satsuki’s wedding dress. But let’s not forget that Junketsu also represents “purity.” When, however, was Satsuki ever impure? You would even say she was at her most “purest” when she was a child. After all, what’s purer than a child. As such, I don’t think purity here is meant to be taken in the moral sense. Rather, purity, as it is used in relation to Junketsu, perhaps represents one’s “purity of focus” or “purity of will.” Once Satsuki has grown up, once her will has been forged in the fires of war, and honed in battle, it is only then that she gets to don Junketsu. After all, we’ve seen a younger Satsuki go from region to region to recruit what is now her Elite Four. She could’ve worn her Junketsu then, but I’d suggest that at that point in the narrative she wasn’t ideologically pure enough to do so. It is only once Satsuki’s gone deep down her path in life that one could say she’s become strong enough in her resolve to bear the burden of wearing a Godrobe.

But why is this the case? Because we’ve been told that most normal people would lose themselves to the Life Fibers. Tsumugu’s late sister is the perfect example of how a Godrobe can consume a person. Nevertheless, we are told that there are two exceptions: Ryuuko and Satsuki. We know Ryuuko is safe because Senketsu has been spliced with her DNA, but what’s the explanation for Satsuki and Junketsu? She has to override him, after all. As such, if her will isn’t strong enough, Junketsu would just devour her. In a way, you could even argue that a naked Satsuki is stronger than a naked Ryuuko, i.e. without their Godrobes. I’m sure it’s a whole different matter when the Godrobes are actually involved. Nevertheless, we see hints of Satsuki faltering. First, when her ego was bruised after the mid-season duel with Ryuuko, it is obvious that the girl was losing control of Junketsu. We could see it pulsating in last week’s episode, moving of its own accord as she panted in pain and exhaustion. But there’s an even bigger problem looming ahead: if Satsuki submits to Ragyo’s grander plans, can we really say that Satsuki has any sort of “purity of will?” After all, she would just be following in someone else’s footsteps. She either has to eventually rebel against her mother or lose control of Junketsu.

• Gamagoori announces that even No Stars and their families are obligated to attend the festival. Not only that, they are required to wear celebratory uniforms. No doubt, this is the process of militarization extended to the general populace.

• Again, Mako’s family represents the lumpenprole. Once they’ve been rest assured that both Mako and her friend are alive, the Mankanshoku patriarch has no qualms about participating in the Cultural and Sports Grand Festival whereas most people would at least have their misgivings. By that, your average person will regard the upcoming festival with distrust, i.e. “Isn’t this just to celebrate the rise of some fascist dictator?” But the Mankanshoku family are not your average family. Their poverty has been so ingrained in their very nature that self-preservation becomes such a huge concern that is only second to their daughter’s welfare on a list of priorities. As such, they are and will always be oblivious to the circumstances surrounding them so long as their self-preservation is fulfilled. Still, their love and concern for their daughter shows that family can triumph over anything. It just doesn’t go far enough, i.e. you won’t ever be able to rely upon Mako’s family to aid in the inevitable revolution.

• According to Aikuro, Ragyo intends to use the audience in attendance as human sacrifices to awaken the Life Fibers. Well, unmitigated and unregulated capitalism did always come at the expense of the working class. But it goes even further than this. This experiment won’t merely awaken the Life Fibers; it will turn the audience in attendance into Life Fibers. But Life Fibers themselves are a commodity, the very commodity in which REVOCS does its trade. In other words, in a commodified world, we too become commodities. And once we’ve become commodities, we can be bought and sold on the market place. Essentially, this is the modern incarnation of slavery.

• Telling words from Ragyo’s bespectacled assistant: “Lady Satsuki is most impressive. She masterfully conquered the teen demographic, which has the highest resistance to Life Fibers.” There’s an interesting dichotomy between youth and capitalism. Youth has always been associated with the ideas of rebellion and the counterculture. Youths necessarily want to distinguish themselves from not only the adults in their lives but each other as well. Capitalism, on the other hand, wants to win over our loyalty. Corporations want us slavishly returning to their brands over and over. At first glance, this aspect of capitalism would seem to go against young people’s rebellious nature. Nevertheless, huge industries will always spring up overnight to take advantage of the latest counterculture fad, e.g. from punk to emo to even the kawaii. So how does Ragyo succeed in attaining wide acceptance of the Ultima Uniforms?

Well, remember that the Ultima Uniforms work by enhancing a very personal aspect of its wearer’s nature. Just take a look at the Elite Four, for example: Gamagoori’s sadistic love for discipline manifests itself in a twisted bondage suit when he exhibits the power of his three-star uniform. As such, the Ultima Uniforms win teens over by appealing to that all-too-common desire in youths to be individualistic. This individualism explains why teens as a demographic would simultaneously have the highest resistance to Life Fibers, but will also buy into the Ultima Uniforms with such loyalty and fervor: “It was ingenious, negating their resistance to Life Fibers by getting them hooked on power of the Ultima Uniforms.”

• At one point, Ragyo says to her Grand Couturier: “‘Fair is foul, foul is fair,’ eh? How very like you, Nui.” As I have suggested, Nui is the joker or the wild card of the story. She doesn’t bother herself with the right and the wrong. All that matters to her is what she finds fun, and she finds chaos fun.

• Ragyo: “There is only one truth. Only those things that earn Ragyo Kiryuin’s approval may be called beautiful.” This line reinforces the idea that the idea of beauty is often dictated to us by the powerful through the use of branding. But of course, since REVOCS controls an overwhelming majority of the market share, it’s only natural that its CEO sees herself as the sole decider of what is and isn’t beautiful.

• I know the Elite Four worships Satsuki, but to what extent are they aware of Ragyo’s grander plans? So even if they are incredibly loyal to Satsuki, how willing are they to see an entire stadium of innocent people sacrificed before their very eyes? Plus, even if Satsuki has referred to her No Stars as nothing but pigs in human clothing, this is still her empire that she’s built up through her own blood, sweat, and tears. This is her “people” even if she has little respect for them. Will she just stand idly by and let them all be consumed as a means to Ragyo’s end? What happens next will be very telling of both the Elite Four and Satsuki herself.

• Familiar imagery:

Sure, we could compare it to the military processions of Nazi Germany — and there’s even an accompanying Western march! — but as I’ve suggested before, that would be a little too on the nose. I mean, why even leave the country at all to find similar imagery?

What’s also interesting to note is the Mankanshoku family’s reaction to everything unfolding in front of them: “Who cares?! Just eat!” Even better, it turns out Mataro is missing his uniform because he sold it long ago. He’s actually naked at the moment; he’s painted his body to look as though he’s actually wearing clothes. The lumpenprole may depend upon capitalism to survive, but they won’t necessarily seek to aid it or anything else but themselves for that matter.

• Wow, real?

But of course, this plays into Ragyo’s megalomaniacal persona. She thinks she can dictate what is and isn’t beautiful — even something as ridiculous as how she appears in the screenshot above. But not only that, her appearance speaks to the excess of wealth. Ragyo is so compelled by the need to distinguish herself from the uncultured masses that this is how she ends up styling herself.

• I also wonder if the anime is also not-so-subtly mocking avant garde fashion. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, I assume you’ve seen those runway pictures of models wearing, well, clothing that aren’t quite functional. But y’know, fashion is like any other form of art, and unless we actually study its intricate history and influences, any cursory judgment on the matter is simply that: cursory, uninformed, and ultimately presumptuous. Is Ragyo’s outfit meant to tweak the idea of high fashion? Obviously, I don’t know for sure — and honestly, even Ragyo’s ridiculous outfit wouldn’t be quite outrageous enough to level a substantive critique at the avant garde — but it wouldn’t surprise me.

• Ragyo: “A ruler must shine like the sun at all times.” The sunlight is basically a metaphor for the Almighty’s judgment. In other words, Ragyo sees herself as the divine. After all, if she succeeds in her plans, she would end up becoming the ruler of the world, would she not? And again, she feels that she can dictate what is and isn’t beautiful. We normally think beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but if there is a God — as in the one and only God — then it would make sense that God is the only being in the world that can decide whether or not something is objectively beautiful. So that’s what Ragyo wants to become through the use of the Life Fibers; she wants to be God. It’s just very convenient to hide behind the will of COVERS as an excuse for her insatiable need to dominate the world.

• Inumuta claims to Ragyo that he no longer “[engages] in hacking and stock manipulation,” to which Ragyo replies, “Oh, you don’t? A pity….” It is the dismissive nature to her response that I find interesting. Stock manipulation can be damaging to corporations, but REVOCS’ CEO sees it as nothing more than an amusing game.

• When Ragyo presses a button, the devouring of her subjects begins. Threads of Life Fibers surround each individual in the audience (except Mataro, of course), and in the end, they all become mummies. Why mummies? The process of mummification involves the removal of a person’s organs, leaving behind only a lifeless husk albeit well-preserved. Essentially, what makes us human has been removed. Of course, no actual organs are being removed in the anime, but that’s why it’s a metaphor. Ragyo even alludes to this process of dehumanization herself: “Such wonderful silence… the cacophony spewed for by the foolish creature known as humanity fades away, and nothing but tranquil fibers will fill the world.” This is the end result of of the commodification of humanity itself. Humanity loses that which defines its nature: the ability to reason. Without reason, we can no longer defy and rebel. And through this process of mummification, Ragyo’s subjects become lifeless husks that can no longer protest. They’ve become the faceless employees of REVOCS, or in other words, the obedient zombie slaves of capitalism.

• It’s interesting that when Ryuuko finally enters the stadium, she voices her desire to put an end to Satsuki’s plans. Foreshadowing?

• Amazing. Satsuki never intended to bind herself to her family’s legacy. And since Ragyo sees herself as a God, she gets a fitting end:

Impaled upon her own throne as if she’s been crucified. What are we to make of these sudden developments? As I’ve said before, Ryuuko’s character arc is more or less complete. By the end of the fifteenth episode, she understands who she is and what she needs to do: to protect the people around her. As such, she’s become the story’s hero. So naturally, I wondered what would happen next for Ryuuko’s foil, a.k.a. Satsuki. I would say that, like our heroine, Satsuki’s character arc is nearing its completion as well. She too won’t stand by and be a witness to her mother’s crimes. But the devil is in the details, and for once, blood is very real:

Remember how I talked about the lack of bodies earlier in the post? The reality is that there is rarely any bloodshed thus far in this entire series. Of course, we’ve seen Matoi Isshin die at Nui’s hands, but nothing quite as dramatic and bloodied as Satsuki’s one act of defiance. You could even say Ragyo’s death is ceremonial; she is the actual human sacrifice of the Culture and Sports Grand Festival. Like the age old trope of the student proving his or her worth by slaying the master, this is Satsuki’s grand moment; this is her character arc coming to fruition. Even when Ryuuko defeated her opponents, our heroine merely stripped her foes of their clothing. As Ryuuko’s foil, however, Satsuki is willing to go where Ryuuko is unwilling or, better yet, cannot go. To achieve her dreams, Satsuki will do whatever it takes. Ryuuko is bound by the her concerns for her fellow humans; she is necessarily innocent. Satsuki, on the other hand, is bound by her ideological purity; she is pure but she cannot be innocent like Ryuuko. It is thus only fitting that her grand moment is ushered in by the series’ most gruesome murder: a matricide.

• But having said all of this, Satsuki insists, “Honnouji Academy is the fortress I created in order to defeat you! Remember that, Ragyo Kiryuin!” Does her last sentence to her mother mean anything? Will Ragyo stay alive somehow? I guess we’ll find out in a week’s time.

• One final note: Ryuuko often loves to pose with her scissor blade like so:

It is almost iconic of the series. Now that Satsuki rebelled against her mother, she does as a good foil does:

Her blade is even red this time, but we know why it’s red. So naturally, we have to ask, “Why is Ryuuko’s scissor blade red?”

At one point in the episode, a hungry, exhausted Masayoshi is almost tempted into stealing a bun from a bakery. “But wait a minute,” you might naturally remark, “Masayoshi didn’t go through with it. He didn’t actually steal the bun.” Ah, but he could have. Even our paragon of goodness and justice nearly falters, and why wouldn’t he? He’s only human, after all. And it is precisely because he is human that he has human limitations, i.e. hunger and exhaustion. To go even further, Masayoshi’s human weaknesses is exactly what a lot of detractors have been asking for: a modern, realistic take on a superhero. “B-b-but Guillotine Gorilla!” you object. Yes, Guillotine Gorilla. I’m going to say this right now: Guillotine Gorilla as well as the rest of his ilk — from King Torture to Miami Ballerina — are necessary components to the narrative. Yes, really. And I’ll tell you why… by quoting a crusty ol’ French dude:

Disneyland is there to conceal the fact that it is the “real” country, all of “real” America, which is Disneyland (just as prisons are there to conceal the fact that it is the social in its entirety, in its banal omnipresence, which is carceral). Disneyland is presented as imaginary in order to make us believe that the rest is real, when in fact all of Los Angeles and the America surrounding it are no longer real, but of the order of the hyperreal and of simulation. It is no longer a question of a false representation of reality (ideology), but of concealing the fact that the real is no longer real, and thus of saving the reality principle.

The Disneyland imaginary is neither true nor false: it is a deterrence machine set up in order to rejuvenate in reverse the fiction of the real. Whence the debility, the infantile degeneration of this imaginary. It ~s meant to be an infantile world, in order to make us believe that the adults are elsewhere, in the “real” world, and to conceal the fact that real childishness is everywhere, particularly among those adults who go there to act the child in order to foster illusions of their real childishness. — Jean Baudrillard

Obviously, the government is a total sham. Obviously, the Prime Minster of Japan is lying to his people. Obviously, he is no hero; he is not the savior that the people of Japan wants him to be. But of course, it’s easy for us to sit here and assert these statements from the perspective of the outside observer. From our vantage point — and we’re not even in the world of Samurai Flamenco so we’re basically cheating — it it is so plainly obvious that Guillotine Gorilla is a joke. So much so that a lot of us have stopped watching the anime as a result. But put yourself in the position of an average person within the world Samurai Flamenco. Wow, the From Beyond bullshit isn’t actually bullshit after all. Yes, it looks dumb as hell, but man, we actually have to evacuate Tokyo today! But thank the gods that we have the Flamengers.

There’s the key right there. Thank the gods we have the Flamengers. The Flamengers is equivalent to the Disneyland imaginary in the quoted passage above. Yes, both the Flamengers and the From Beyond monsters are silly, but they are “presented as imaginary in order to make [the rest of the populace] believe that the rest is real, when in fact all of [Tokyo] and the [Japan] surrounding it are no longer real,” i.e. the government is a sham. The fake nature of the conflict between the Flamengers and the From Beyond monsters are admirable and attractive. It constitutes what I would call the superhero imaginary. Yay, we have heroes to save the day! Yay, no matter what happens, the good guys will always triumph! The illusion was so extreme that it even began to bore some people. Remember that? Remember how Masayoshi, when he was still Samurai Flamenco and not Red Flamenger, would battle some monster on the streets of Japan and people would just walk by as if it was just any other day in their ordinary lives? The fairy tale nature of the superhero imaginary makes it so that we shouldn’t realistically regard these events with any sort of urgency. This reminds me of a humorous moment in The Simpsons when the buffoonish Homer goes to space only to find himself in peril. This is how his own daughter and father react to the situation:

Lisa: C’mon Dad, you can make it.
Grandpa Simpson: Of course he’ll make it. It’s TV!

This is exactly what happens in the anime. People don’t even pay attention because “[o]f course the heroes will win. It’s [like on] TV!” So what am I getting at? In reaction to the latest episodes, a lot of people are like, “How can everyone just believe the Prime Minister? Why would everyone turn on the Flamengers so easily? Is mass media really that potent?” It’s because the superhero imaginary has made the hyperreal seem all too real. People didn’t feel the urgency when Samurai Flamenco was battling King Torture’s minions because it’s so obviously TV-like and so obviously imaginary. I mean, just look at Miami Ballerina! So to re-iterate, the hyperreality of the world around them becomes the reality. The threat of the Flamengers being terrorists suddenly becomes urgent even though it is just as fake as the From Beyond monsters. But that’s the thing. In reality, it’s just as fake, but it doesn’t look as fake. It looks more real. What are you going to believe? That some superhero organization are really terrorists in disguise or… Miami Ballerina? The answer is obvious.

And so people mistake the hyperreal for the real because they’ve bought into the superhero imaginary. Again, the superhero imaginary has made it so attractive for some mythological hero to appear out of nowhere and save the day in a clean and tidy fashion. Now that the Flamengers are seen as the villains, people now look to the Prime Minister to fill the missing gap, i.e. become the mythological hero. As viewers, we know the truth. We know the Prime Minister is a fake as well as his government. But the people within the actual universe of Samurai Flamenco don’t have the same advantages that we do. As such, they’ve lost sight of the real. And now, we get to ask the all-important question: what is the real? To put it in a better way, who has been the “realest” person throughout the entire series? There is only one answer: our everyday man Gotou.

Gotou has really suffered as a result of the superhero imaginary. As I’ve said, the superhero imaginary makes it so that we come to rely upon great men (or women) to save the day. When you can’t call upon the Flamengers, the next best thing is to rely upon our appointed leaders. And as result, this just ends up obscuring the real, i.e. the everyday people who contribute to keeping the world a safe place. I know I’m repeating myself, but I’m just about to get to my point. Look at it this way. I’m pretty lucky. I’m not rich, but I don’t live in the ghetto or anything. I can walk down to a nearby burger place — about two blocks away — at midnight and it’s likely that nothing will happen to me. No one’s going to mug me, no one’s going to kill me (hopefully, I haven’t jinxed myself…). Of course, you can’t say the same for some of the worse areas of this country, but you get my point: my community is relatively safe. Now, who can I thank for that? Obama, my president? Of course not. He’s the appointed leader of the United States, but it would be absolutely ludicrous to attribute my everyday safety to him. In reality, I am safe due to a confluence of factors.

From cops to neighborhood leaders to just parents teaching their children the difference between right and wrong, these are all reasons for why I am able to grab a burger at midnight without having to worry about being mugged or stabbed. Admittedly, I’m using a bit of an ideal example here, but my point is that we often lose sight of the real due to the powerful influence of the imaginary. Guys like Gotou are heroes as well. They do their part in keeping the peace in Japan, but unfortunately, they’ve been forgotten. They’ve been subsumed by the superhero imaginary. It is much easier to put all of our eggs in one basket. We don’t have to extend our trust to the rest of our community. We don’t have to depend upon each and every single neighbor to keep the world a safe place. We can just shine a spotlight and call upon our superheroes to swoop in and save the day. But let’s not forget what the beginnings of Samurai Flamenco — the beginnings of Masayoshi’s career — was all about. It was about the small things, i.e. don’t smoke in a non-smoking area. It’s finding heroism in every little deed no matter how small and insignificant they may seem in the bigger picture. The truth is that Gotou is a hero too, but because his job is to merely patrol the neighborhood, he’s been forgotten. Even Masayoshi has forgotten about Gotou.

No, Gotou has not been forgotten in the sense that Masayoshi no longer remembers who he is anymore. Obviously, our hero still remembers who Gotou is. Gotou is Masayoshi’s best friend. But y’see, until the very end of this episode, he was only a friend in Masayoshi’s eyes. And it is precisely for this reason that our protagonist is reluctant to rely upon Gotou. By seeing him as nothing more than a friend, it’s only natural that Masayoshi would then worry for Gotou’s sake, i.e. “I can’t get him involved; the Prime Minister’s people have been interrogating all of my friends and I don’t want anything bad to happen to my best friend.” So then what changed at the end?

The beggar is living proof that anyone can perform deeds of heroism. The beggar is also a part of the real that people like Masayoshi have lost sight of. Anyone from the paragon of righteousness that is Red Flamenger to even a disgraced beggar can be a hero. And if you doubt the beggar’s heroism, he puts himself on the line to get Masayoshi out a sticky situation. What do you think will happen to the blind man if the the Prime Minister’s goons ever find out that he had aided Masayoshi? So this single act of heroism reminds our hero that he isn’t alone. It also reminds him that the superhero imaginary is only that. More importantly, Masayoshi need not carry this burden by himself because there are more heroes out there than he can possibly imagine.

By extension, therefore, Gotou is a hero as well. Yes, he’s a friend — and it’s perfectly naturally to worry for a friend’s sake — but he too can help Masayoshi fight for what is right. Part of this requires Masayoshi to reject the superhero imaginary, i.e. the very same imaginary that has made an idol out of him. And this is the return to the real. This is a rejection of both the superhero imaginary and the hyperreality surrounding the Prime Minister’s gambit. And I would contend that none of this would’ve been possible without our good ol’ friend Guillotine Gorilla.

We should use the last few lines of the “episode” to put everything into context: “When I’m in pain, I know I’m not dreaming. I don’t need nice friends or gentle lovers. So, Shirou-san, please… won’t you hit me again?” Then the bespectacled man, presumably Shirou, puts a hand to his chin and looks off to the side as if he’s thinking to himself, “Golly, that does sound like a swell idea. Maybe I should beat my wife.” It’s almost comical. It feels… unreal. Is it? Well, let me put this way… who on earth would ever want to be abused? Why would you not want nice friends? Why would you not want a gentle lover? And we’re not talking about consensual BDSM play here. We’re talking about actual domestic abuse. In any case, I’ll tell you who: a person suffering from a mental illness. To put it bluntly, the mother is C-R-A-Z-Y. And thus, why would you ever believe anything a crazy person tells you?

“When I’m in pain,” the mother says, “I know I’m not dreaming.” It’s why you often hear people advise you to pinch yourself in order to see if you’re in a dream or not. But it’s not like this is a scientific method to “dream-shattering” or anything. It’s just a saying. And what I read from her words is that she wants to run away. She cannot handle it — whatever ‘it’ is supposed to be — and as a result, she’s trying to hide in a world of pain. Now remember, there’s a fine line between pleasure and pain. And either way, the end result is that the nervous system floods itself with endorphins. When you feel pleasure, it’s endorphins kicking in. When you feel pain, it’s still endorphins. It’s just that this time it’s working to dull your senses instead. So in the end, it makes no difference what the mother says. She just basically wants to drug herself. She wants to enter a dreamworld despite what she tells us. And of course, we shouldn’t take her words at face value precisely because she’s crazy.

But what does it mean to have a crazy mother? Now before we continue on, I want to re-iterate that I’m primarily concerned with the show’s subtext. Subtext should be distinguished from the text, a.k.a. the events of the narrative as they literally appear before us. What do I mean by this? The text of the story, as I’m sure you ready know by now, is that Yume turns into a monster with an insatiable appetite for human flesh. But what’s the subtext of the story? There’s a compelling case to be made that Yume is a girl undergoing her sexual awakening, but then this sexual awakening is being demonized for various reasons that I’ve discussed in previous posts on the anime. Now by asserting the latter, I am not saying that the text is untrue. I’m merely saying that the text is a vehicle with which storytellers may use to convey a deeper, more controversial message.

So what’s the subtext of pupa‘s fifth episode? What’s the oh-so-controversial message that it can’t tell us directly — that it has to hide it behind a horror story? Right from the very beginning, the mother immediately sees her daughter as nothing more than a monster. She thinks she needs to get an abortion for Utsutsu’s sake. Somehow, however, the fetus is preventing her from doing so. All we see is a cheap electrifying effect followed by a guess — literally just a guess — from the mother herself: “Was that the monster’s way of saying it won’t let me?” I mean, she doesn’t really know for sure, because the truth would be outlandish: an evil fetus is somehow preventing itself from aborted. But if that’s so ridiculous, then why didn’t she just get an abortion? Shrug, maybe she just felt too guilty to go through with it. She’s crazy, after all.

When Yume is finally born, she keeps glancing at her mother. But the mother somehow thinks these glances have a sinister intent: “…the way she would look at me sometimes… I can’t take this. It feels like she’s watching my every move.” Y’know, babies tend to look to their mothers. Why? That’s just nature; we naturally cling to our caregivers. Nothing particularly monstrous about that. The mother then tells that Yume already has all her teeth ever since she’s been born. Well, this is actually a thing called natal teeth. They are rare, but y’know, not particularly monstrous. One case in every two to three thousand births does not spell monster to me. It just sounds like a crazy mother spinning any tale she can to rationalize her hatred of her own daughter. Now, I’ve never heard of a baby being born with a full set of teeth, but again, can we really trust the mother? Can we really take her words at face value? She even says, “It was as though [Yume] was declaring herself to be a monster,” but all I see is a yawning baby.

What supposedly happens next is that the mother tries to kill her “monster child” with a box cutter. But unfortunately for her, the murder attempt fails somehow; Yume is still alive. Yume’s even giggling to her mother. The next thing we see is the mother in a hospital bed. Or is it a bed at a psychiatric ward? Would it make a difference? Clearly, the mother tried to abuse Yume, and maybe she’s just trying to tell herself that she was really just trying to rid the world of a dangerous monster. And even then, it’s not as if Yume gave off a sinister laugh. Rather, the child giggled like any baby would when it’s around its mother. You could even say Yume has unconditional love for her mother, but she was still rejected.

Finally, the mother snaps for good when even Utsutsu starts to question her cruelty. He prevents her fantasies from becoming a reality. After all, she wants to hate this child; she thinks she would be doing Utsutsu a favor if she could murder Yume. Child Utsutsu, however, is an innocent voice that cuts through all her fabrications and lies: “Mom, why are you being so mean to Yume?” But you might ask, “What about the scene where we see baby Yume tear into a dead bird with her teeth? Doesn’t that make her monstrous?” Again, we’re talking about the subtext of the story. The text itself may very well be real; it may actually be the case that Yume is a monster baby that likes to catch and eat small animals. But let’s look beyond the text. What is the story trying to tell us? And in order to do that, it is necessary to juxtapose the more horrific elements of the narrative with the mundane. One minute, you’re tell me that a young child hunts and eats small animals. Then another minute, you’re telling me that she looks at you “weirdly.” One example seems comically monstrous and the other example is ridiculously mundane to the point that this juxtaposition can only tell you one thing: the mother is an unreliable narrator.

We often readily accept that a father can and will be abusive. But sometimes, a mother can be just as bad. A mother too can abuse her children. What’s even worse is that a mother can reject her own female children for whatever reasons, thereby placing her one and only son onto a pedestal as if he’s the golden child that can do no wrong. This is a story about a young mother’s cruel rejection of her own daughter. She’s using every trick in the book to paint Yume as a monster. She even abuses her own daughter, which is probably why she ended up in some hospital bed. But can a story just come out and say, “Yeah, this is about domestic abuse from both the father and the mother?” Likewise, can a story come out and say that it’s directly about the demonization of a young girl’s blossoming sexuality? Well, that’s why we have subtext.

Just gotta learn to deal with it. Yeesh, only two shows left. Maybe I should add Nagi no Asukura to the mix next week…

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Golden Time Ep. 17

Episode summary: At a party, Linda wonders if Banri’s going to visit his parents and brings up their class reunion. Out of nowhere, Koko insists that Banri will attend the event and the guy just goes along with it. Later, she reaffirms her love for him again. Meanwhile, Mitsuo feels insecure about his relationship with Linda. He starts digging into Banri’s past as a result.

Notes & thoughts: Mitsuo’s being an idiot, but Linda isn’t helping. I doubt they’ve had the exclusive talk or anything, but if you can’t be honest with each other even at the very nascent stages of a relationship, then why even bother? Linda had an opportunity to be upfront with the guy; she could’ve told him just the facts, i.e. “Banri and I are childhood friends, we’re going to attend the same high school reunion, and you have nothing to worry about.” But she didn’t. And sorry, lying by omission is still lying.

Look, she’s not a stupid girl. She can tell that the guy is being put off. But what happens next is a series of selfish, immature decision-making. She willingly chose to ignore his feelings. She willingly chose to mislead him by claiming she won’t run into Banri during their trip home. She willingly chose to walk away when he asked, “Why do you think I’m doing this?” Call him passive-aggressive if you want, but that was him attempting to start a difficult discussion and Linda threw it back in his face by walking away. And when you take all of her deliberate choices into consideration, you have to start wondering, “Why?” Why be secretive if Mitsuo truly has nothing to worry about. Perhaps he does have something to worry about.

And don’t get me wrong. I’m not excusing Mitsuo’s actions whatsoever. He’s being incredibly insecure, and he could’ve been upfront with Linda too. He didn’t have to grab her tickets and tease her. From the very start, he could’ve just asked her straight up, “Yo, what’s the true deal between you and Banri? I just want to have an adult conversation about it.” But he had to go and piss her off first, and even when he did get to the question he wanted to ask, he did it in such a roundabout manner that he can’t help but come off as accusatory. But still, Linda is partly responsible for Mitsuo’s behavior and she’s just not owning up to it.

It’s sad really. There is no end to the countless number of serious problems we face in the world each and every single day of our lives. So when all you really have to do is to just sit and discuss things like mature adults, why wouldn’t you? Why would willingly make the world even worse by lying or being passive aggressive? I could understand it if these were children, but they’re in college already. What I said last week about maturity being a gradient is still true, but if they still don’t have interpersonal skills by now, then I don’t know what to say. Like I’ve said, it’s sad.

But honestly, I’m just watching Golden Time because I want something to blog about after I’m done with the good shows (oh you know ones). It’s really a terrible show and you shouldn’t watch a second of it.

* * * * *

Mahou Sensou Ep. 5

Episode summary: Mui and her friends still want to go out into the Ruined World in order to retrieve her brother. The school’s headmistress will only let them do so, however, if they pass an exam. During the exam, Violet infiltrates the campus and attacks our heroes with a stone golem. Through the power of teamwork, the kids manage to overcome the golem anyway. Afterwards, Kurumi goes home for winter break where she learns that Gekkou intends to enroll in the magic academy the following April. Meanwhile, Takeshi and Mui are having a training session when the latter falls ill from a fever. Naturally, he carries back to her room, and somehow ends up getting into bed with her. Unfortunately, Kurumi walks in on them just as Takeshi was about to leave. This causes a fracture in the friendship as Takeshi refuses to play pretend-couple with Kurumi any longer. Oigami, whose memories have been wiped, now takes an interest in Kurumi. Magical Warfare or Magical Love Polygon? You decide!

Notes & thoughts: Okay, let’s analyze the episode. Uh… hm… yeah… well, during the exam, Takeshi runs into an obstacle:

Mechanical bugs with mounted gatling guns. Awesome, isn’t it?

So just a bit later in the story, when they were battling the stone golem, Mui jumps into the air to shoot a fireball at it. The golem manages to block her attack, however, by simply sticking one of its palms straight out. In response, Mui exclaims:

You don’t say. And here I thought a walking stone golem was nothing more than just smoke and mirrors.

Meanwhile, the school nurse feels up the school’s headmistress because…

…why not? Yuri for everyone. Alright, I admit it. I don’t have anything to say about this week’s episode. It’s just really stupid.

Despite what the image above says, don’t get your hopes up. In any case, I want to speed these Harem Hill posts up some. No, it’s not that I want to slack off and cut corners. Rather, I think the highlights from each episode are all we need. I’ll still give you guys the general gist of what happens in each anime so that the highlights have some context, but I’ll try not to bog these Harem Hill entries down in minutia anymore. Unless, of course, people prefer the old way. If that’s the case, then let me know.

* * * * *

Nourin Ep. 5

Not really a harem episode, so I’ll just give you guys the highlights. At one point, our group of four friends run out of miso paste, so they have to go up to Class 2-B to ask the Biotech Division for a refill. There, Bio Suzuki is more than willing to part with her deluxe miso so long as Kousaku and Kei perform an experiment for her. She wants to test out a yogurt’s effect on a person’s skin, so she gives the two boys water guns filled with said yogurt. And, well, let the games begin:

Bio Suzuki makes sure to remind the two friends how to bukkake properly…

After all, you wouldn’t want to waste a single drop. Kei gets a little too excited about the whole thing, which leaves our harem lead in quite a sticky mess…

Oh well, it’s all just fun and games, right?

Later, the group ends up in the forest for some reason. Bio Suzuki tells Kousaku that Class 2-F is on the move, but I have no clue what that means, In any case, the four of them run into the Forest Division, a class of manly but lonely guys. Y’see, they’re so manly from living out here in the forest and working with their wood that they don’t understand why mamby-pamby losers like Kousaku gets all the female attention. Whatever. We’re here for the highlights. You guys have seen Minori plenty throughout these posts, right? Y’know, she’s the childhood friend who pines for the harem lead, but he brushes her off in favor in Rin? Well apparently, she’s supposed to be chubby. That’s what the anime tells us, anyway:

Sure Nourin, you’re totally right. What a total chubster. If only girls would police their own bodies some more…

What happens next with Class 2-F isn’t very interesting, so let’s just keep the train moving. Out of nowhere, Rose Hanazono — it’s really a guy, by the way — absconds with Rin. When Kousaku shows up to rescue her, the representative of Class 2-E challenges our hero to a game of chicken… but with Pocky!

But despite Kei’s best efforts to warn his friend about the dangers of said game, Rose successfully tricks Kousaku into kissing him. Not just any kiss, however; we’re talking about Kousaku’s first kiss. Oh no, how horrible. A man’s lips touched mine. I’m hetero, which means I have to act as if anything remotely homosexual is the worst thing ever. In any case, two of the three encounters with the Farming Top Four have been about how being gay is humiliating. I’m too hopped up on at the moment so I’ll just let you guys decide what this means. And with that, we’re done with Nourin for at least a week.

* * * * *

Nisekoi Ep. 5

Last week’s key term was “indefinitely deferred” and nothing’s changed this week. Being the gentleman that he is, Raku eavesdrops on a conversation between Kosaki and her friend Ruri. The two girls are basically discussing the former’s reluctance to pursue a guy who’s already got himself a girlfriend. So you’d naturally think, “Wow, this is a crucial bit of information that Raku needs to hear if he ever wants to get the girl of his dreams.” But by now, you should know how harems work. In harem reality — as opposed to our reality — Raku has a hard time hearing what the girls are saying whenever they’re actually talking about something important. So he didn’t hear any of that stuff about how Kosaki is interested in him. Rather, he suddenly gets perfect hearing when Ruri changes the topic to a discussion about the key in Kosaki’s possession. Yes, anything to do with that damn pendant. That’s what Raku can hear with perfect clarity, not the bit where Kosaki is actually in love with him. Classic harem move.

So what is this episode about? Ruri is suspicious of the fake relationship at the center of the show’s premise, so she intends to expose the truth for Kosaki’s sake. Honestly, though, what is so good about Kosaki? She seems pretty dumb to me:

If that’s the feminine ideal, I want no part of it. In any case, Ruri’s plans somehow involve everyone teaching Kosaki how to swim. And thanks to that, we get lingering shots of every girl’s body. Oh boy! I fucking swear if I got a dollar for every time the camera cuts to a close-up of one of the girl’s crotch, I wouldn’t need to work for a living. That’s for damn sure.

Meanwhile, the target audience gets to dissociate itself into two distinct personalities: the average, bland but safe Raku and the super perverted best friend Shu. Raku will pretend like all the half naked girls around him doesn’t even get his blood rising one bit. He’s the good guy! That’s why all the girls love him! On the other hand, we’ll just stick all of our debased proclivities into Shu instead. He gets to be bold; he gets to straight up ask one of the girls whether or not he can rub sun lotion on their skin. He’ll act out all of our perverted desires without tainting Raku’s image. So ingenious!

But say, where’s Claude? Oh don’t worry. He’s right here:

He’s just busy simultaneously crying and getting a nosebleed at the sight of his half-naked lady. My, my, what a guardian. What girl wouldn’t feel safe with him around!

At one point, Chitoge shows up in a standard one piece swimsuit. She had worn a two piece just the day before, so Raku felt the need to point this out. In response, the girl teases him, “Oh wait! Or could it be that you wanted to see me in my bikini, darling?” How does our hero react to this harmless banter? Like a true gentleman!

Haha, you’d be so cute if you hadn’t dared to tease me. I do the negging, alright? Me! I’m the negger. You’re the neggee!

Nisekoi is really getting old at this point. Every week, the show follows a strict formula. Raku goes on and on about how awesome Kosaki is… until a flaw peeks through Chitoge’s flawless exterior. So what brings Raku and Chitoge closer together this time? Compatible personalities? Shared interests? NO! Her flaws! The more she fucks up, the better of a candidate for love she is! Case in point, despite all the hullabaloo over Kosaki’s inability to swim, it’s Chitoge who ends up drowning in the pool. Why? ‘Cause in her arrogance, she refused to warm up. So in the middle of a swim, both of her legs cramp up and she’s in dire straits:

So Raku, ever the man of action, springs forth to save the helpless maiden, but not before he gets one last neg off:

Last week, our harem lead had to comfort Chitoge when out of nowhere it turned out that she’s incredibly afraid of the dark. Now, Raku gets to save her life! And this is quite important because the anime had just made a big deal out how well Chitoge can swim just earlier in the episode:

Yes, she’s excellent at it! But if you’re a girl, fuck your excellence! You won’t win the harem lead’s heart if he can’t spend all day lecturing to you about how you’re fucking up at something that you’re really quite an expert at! So tear it down! Tear everything that is good about yourself down! In fact, let yourself drown in a shallow pool! Then afterwards, the harem lead can give you CPR and reassert his manhood all at the same time:

Two birds with one stone. Nice. But don’t feel bad, Chitoge…

…psst… if you want, we could just say this is an example of a brutal character letting down her defenses. I mean, if it would be less humiliating for you… we could pretend as though we’re not being sexist at all.

In the end, Raku was so gallant in his act of heroism, that the girls must naturally ask:

Kosaki denies it, but the girl totally would drown herself if it meant she could be in Raku’s arms. I mean, who wouldn’t! It’s for true love, after all. Doki doki. Anyway, we’ll leave off with some awesome continuity errors brilliance from Shaft. Ruri puts her hair into a ponytail:

Yet no ponytail on Ruri here:

But ponytail on Ruri just shortly afterwards:

But alas, no ponytail:

Wait, it’s back:

Y’know, maybe Ruri’s just neurotic and she has to redo her ponytail three times before she’s satisfied with it. Or maybe she’s always had her ponytail and I’m just on

* * * * *

Saikin, Imouto no Yousu ga Chotto Okashiinda ga. Ep. 6

When we last left off, Mitsuki had fallen ill so Hiyori grabbed the opportune titty (according to Day) to seize control of the poor girl’s body once more. And now, Hiyori has the golden chance of a lifetime:

You go, girl! You screw the brains out of that… brother… of yours… But as you can tell, Mitsuki’s body is nowhere to be found in the screenshot above. Yes, Yuuya sees Hiyori instead of his stepsister! What could this mean? But before we can answer this crucial question, Mitsuki returns to her normal self and collapses from her fever. Quick, get her some help! Wait, I don’t care how sick she is; let’s take a peek at the girl’s ass first:

Okay, now get her some help.

The following morning, Mitsuki re-iterates that she’s done with Hiyori, to which the ghost responds,

Oh woe be to me. I can’t get into heaven because this girl won’t fuck her stepbrother! But cut Hiyori some slack. She just “couldn’t help it.” After all, God told her to never give up. Yes, the Almighty himself! With His voice booming down from the heavens above, God steels Hiyori’s resolve:

In any case, despite seeing a complete stranger on top of him just the night before, Yuuya decides to stick with the split-personality theory. He thus asks Yuki if it’s possible for a person’s personality to change when they’re in a new environment. Our harem leads are such geniuses. I mean, what else could explain MItsuki’s bizarre behavior? Why else would a girl suddenly wear a chastithong?! And then it hits him:

A-plus logic, my friend. A-plus! The guy even goes, “That would make sense.” Yes, what mother wouldn’t give her daughter a chastithong?

To Yuuya’s credit, he does finally come to the conclusion that this theory is too ridiculous. I mean, it’s completely batshit insane that he even came up with it in the first place, but hey… maybe he’s on too. In any case, he needs a new theory. So… what about that strange girl he’s been seeing around MItsuki? Y’know, the one that was just on top of him the night before?

“She left suddenly yesterday…” Are you serious? So there was a stranger in my stepsister’s room — a stranger I’ve never been introduced to before — she even got on top of me, tried to have sex with me, then she just “left suddenly” without me even realizing where she had gone. I’m telling you guys… it’s the .

“Was she there to visit since [Mitsuki] was sick?” Yuuya wonders. This guy, man, this guy. “What was she doing in that dark room,” Yuuya asks himself as the hamster wheel continues to spin futilely in that tiny noggin of his. “I get it,” Yuuya finally exclaims!

…

Yuki interrupts Yuuya’s train of thought, however, and asks the guy, “Who do you think influenced me to change the way I was before?” Y’see, Yuki was a major tomboy before she moved away. It’s obvious she’s now become a girlie girl for Yuuya’s sake. Girls always change their personalities wholesale for the D, so pfft, stop asking such frivolous questions. Back to daydreaming about your stepsister’s bare ass…

So when Yuuya gets home, it turns out Mitsuki is still asleep. But wait a minute, if she’s still asleep, then why is she begging that both she and Yuuya take a bath immediately? Ah, it turns out Hiyori has decided to escalate things. She’s not even going to wait for Mitsuki to be awake anymore before possessing the poor girl. She’ll just wait until Mitsuki’s asleep, then use this window to seduce Yuuya. That… that seems fucked up, but I think we’ve gone beyond any possible classification of rape. Like what do you even call it? “A ghost takes advantage of my sleeping self to fuck my own stepbrother” rape? But don’t forget, poor Hiyori had no choice! God told her to do this! And it’s all for Mitsuki’s sake too! After all, if this bizarre rape scenario doesn’t play out…

So I ask you… if Hiyori doesn’t deserve an eternity of bliss and happiness, then who amongst us does? Who, I ask? This is about the survival of the strong, and the culling of the meek! And Hiyori won’t allow something as pathetic as “Rape is bad” keep her from getting into heaven.

Attack on Titan‘s got nothing on Imocho‘s inspiring story of survival at all costs. The chastithong is a force of nature, and the ghost must do what she can to break its chains of fate! If Mitsuki’s body gets used against her wishes, so be it. We have no time for morality’s petty concerns.

Don’t falter now, Hiyori! Don’t falter now! Charge on without any inhibitions!

But unfortunately, Mitsuki had to wake up and ruin all the fun. All of a sudden, Yuuya tells Mitsuki that she doesn’t have to come out of the closet if she isn’t ready to do so. Wait, what? Yes, he still thinks she’s a fucking lesbian. But look, he’s magnanimous about it; he’s totally tolerant of her queer lifestyle:

But he continues on, “But you know… I wish you’d hold back a little on… flirting in the house. I mean, I’m living here too, so…” I get it, I get it! You don’t want my harem lead dick! But you don’t have to rub it in my face or anything!

I’m telling ya, it’s the .

…’til I can get my satisfaction.

Episode summary: Yukine is still depressed over last week’s events, so he runs off yet again. At the mall, he realizes that nobody can stop him from stealing, so he swipes a skateboard. When Yato and Hiyori finally locate the rebellious Regalia, Hiyori covers for Yukine by claiming to Yato that she had paid for the kid’s skateboard. Suddenly, Bishamonten, the blonde goddess we were introduced to in last week’s episode, attacks Yato. She intends to avenge one of her fallen Regalias by killing both Yato and his Regalia. With Bishamonten in hot pursuit of our protagonist, Hiyori runs to Kofuku for help. The goddess of bad luck interrupts the battle between Yato and Bishamonten by opening up a giant vent, ‘causing Phantoms to flood into the human world. In the end, this forces Bishamonten to retreat, but not before she sneers at Yato’s weakening state. Our formerly carefree god is wondering whether or not he and Yukine can ever truly coexist as a team. Taking advantage of the situation, Nora steps out from the shadows — it appears that she’s been stalking him this entire time — to offer him her services as a Regalia once more.

Notes:

• I guess Yukine is still staying at Hiyori’s house for the time being. By making hot cocoa and baking cookies for him, I still feel as though she’s just enabling the kid. After all, Yukine thinks it’s okay to just “borrow” whatever he sees if he feels like it, so it doesn’t help when people with good intentions continually pamper him as though he’s a pet to be cared for. Did he even face any consequence for running away last week and almost getting himself killed the process? And still, he gets to go back to Hiyori’s cushy home where he gets free food and shelter. What I’m saying is that Yukine isn’t Hiyori’s child, but she’s spoiling him rotten.

• So naturally, Yukine makes a mess of the cocoa and cookies (what a waste of good cocoa), then runs off to the mall. Yeah, he didn’t ask to become Yato’s Regalia, but I don’t think he’s doing much better under Hiyori’s watch. Even worse, he wants to blame what happened last week to the little girl on Yato. No, I get it; he’s immature because he is still young. And that’s why it’s even more critical that Hiyori doesn’t enable Yukine’s rotten behavior.

• On a more light-hearted note, what happens to the skateboard once it enters Yukine’s possession anyhow? What I mean is that people can obviously see a skateboard as it is a physical object, but people can’t see Yukine because he currently exists as a supernatural being. So again, what happens to the skateboard? Let’s say Yukine is currently riding around on it. Do people just see a skateboard traveling to and fro with nobody on top? Or does it suddenly become supernatural as soon as Yukine steals it, and it is thus invisible to the human eye? But when Yukine and Hiyori was having a mini tug-of-war over a skateboard last week, was half of it visible?

• Why would Hiyori ask her friends if they’ve seen Yukine? How could they have seen him?

• What a coincidence that all three of our main characters would run into each other at exactly the same time….

• Welp, Hiyori fails again. Yato asks if it’s true that she had bought Yukine a skateboard. She knows she didn’t, and yet, she tells Yato that she did. Now remember, Yato has repeatedly told Hiyori that he feels a stinging pain whenever Yukine has dirty or immoral thoughts. I guess Hiyori must have just plain forgotten about it. In any case, she is enabling Yukine’s rotten behavior hardcore.

• What’s with Bishamonten’s getup anyway? Gods are immortal, right? So I doubt she’s always looked like that. At what point did she decide, “Yeah, a bikini top and a miniskirt would really make a fearsome-looking god of combat.”

• Yato reveals to Yukine that the latter’s emotional state impacts him just as much. In other words, binding a Regalia to yourself is almost like an act of trust. After all, you wouldn’t want to bind an emotionally unstable Regalia. You’d just end up sapping your own power as a result. But here’s the thing: Yato merely bound Yukine out of nowhere. He had never known Yukine until the day he made the wayward spirit his Regalia. So was Yato being foolishly reckless? Hasn’t he been around the block long enough, so to speak, to know otherwise?

• Apparently, Bishamonten is full of Regalias. Even her clothes are Regalias. Wait, her clothes too? Even that bikini top? Even her miniskirt?

• What a burn: “Just leave me alone already, you half-naked, jacket-wearing tramp!” Yeah, get your jacket-wearing ass outta my town!

• Well, all I know is that all those Regalias can’t help Bishamonten aim for jack:

So much for the god of combat.

• Mystery solved, I guess. It turns out every god has a nice smell to them… ’cause Hiyori’s a cat. And cats have a keen sense of smell. Of course, this doesn’t mean that she still doesn’t have a crush on Yato — I mean, just look at the way she blushes when she’s attempting to “sniff” out his scent — but hey, at least he doesn’t smell awesome just because her heart goes doki doki whenever he’s around.

• According to Yato, he killed one of Bishamonten’s Regalias just because he felt like it. I doubt that’s true. Why he would feel the need to lie, however, is beyond me. Naturally, Yukine is now concerned that he might one day be killed if Yato ever feels like it.

• Well, now Bishamonten’s a Final Fantasy character.

• Not one but two ladies show up to save Yato’s ass. Well, three if you count Hiyori. What a ladykiller.

• In the end, Yukine still hasn’t learned his lesson. Hiyori certainly won’t discipline him, and since she saw fit to take the Regalia away from Yato, she’s technically responsible for this whole mess. On a related note, I bet we’ll never see that skateboard again. Oh well. I guess you could say that these episodes are just as much about Hiyori’s lack of maturity as they are about Yukine’s.

• The story has moved forward this week, but… well, I didn’t get much out of it other than what literally happened. That’s a little disappointing.

After last week’s semi-cliffhanger ending, Toaru Hikuushi e no Koiuta‘s bound to deliver with the goods this week, right? Right…?

Episode summary: The leaders of Isla learn from a captured pilot that the Sky Clan will attack if Isla continues on its journey. Despite this, Leopold refuses to send out recon planes to check out the surrounding area unless they have the students do it instead. Luis de Alarcon reluctantly agrees to go with this plan as long as Claire, a.k.a. Nina Viento, doesn’t have to partake in the mission. Meanwhile, the students open a ramen shop for a night and rake in a ton of money. When de Alarcon stops by to discuss the recon mission with the students’ instructors, Chiharu overhears the grisly details. Although she fails to tell her friends what she’s heard, she has a mini-breakdown over it anyway. She and Mitty bond when the latter attempts to comfort her.

Thoughts:

• The Holy Spring looks rather hallucinogenic, doesn’t it? Claire calls it “the angel’s rings,” but eh… angel rings, angel dust, tomato, to-mah-to. In any case, the sight of the stuff alone is enough to bring Claire to tears.

• See, they talk of the Holy Spring as if it’s really just one gigantic spring in the middle of the ocean, but if that’s the case, then where is the Sky Clan coming from? There doesn’t appear to be any sort of land within at least hundreds of miles.

• How convenient! The Sky Clan speaks a language similar to that of Balsteros! De Alacon reacts to this bit of information as though it is an amazing revelation. I guess we’re going to find out soon that the Sky Clan are former citizens of Balsteros, but their group has splintered off somehow.

• The animation is really starting to come apart at the seams:

I guess that’s just to be expected as we begin to hit the midseason lull.

• De Alarcon starts to say Nina Viento’s full name before correcting himself to say Claire Cruz instead. Why did he even bother to correct himself though? It’s not as if her identity is a secret to the people he’s talking to. Leopold seems to know instantly who de Alarcon’s talking about.

• Well, fuck plot development. Instead, let’s wax poetic over awesome ramen tastes!

• Ramen is so delicious that it can even win elitist jerks over! Sigh….

• It’s not just any ramen though. It’s Ari’s ramen! Ari…men… Ari-men! Get it?! Wow, so clever.

• Yeah, Kal-el! Stop slacking off and thinking about how the plot will advance! Will you give it a rest with the End of the Sky stuff already? We have ramen to serve. Ugh, you main characters are so useless sometimes. It’s always plot this and character development that.

• Kal’s compliment to Claire was so amazing, it made the poor girl drop a bunch of bowls and cut herself trying to pick up the broken pieces. Oh man, just when I thought the show was going to get interesting, I have nothing to talk about.

• Ari is hesitant to leave her station because she’s apparently the only one who can cook the ramen noodles. ‘Cause boiling noodles until it’s the right consistency is so hard!

• Dat animation doe…

• Ari then tells Claire that she should get some rest. Rest… all because the girl cut her finger. Oh my god please just get back to the plot. Claire’s so glad that Ari-men is popular. After all, it’s so delicious. Kill. Me.

• Welp, I was wrong. Kal’s too stupid to even boil noodles correctly. I guess I’ll just have to break out my tried-and-tested guide on how to cook properly. Let’s see… now where did I put it… ah, here we go. But before I show it to you guys, just remember that cooking is a daunting task. Don’t freak out if what you’re about to see overwhelms you. It’s okay! We were all beginners once! Alright, here we go:

Yep, that’s about it.

• So eventually, everyone else decides to try their hand at boiling noodles, and they all suck too! That is, until Ignacio steps up to the plate!

…continue the main story pls…

• So Ignacio gets it right. He knows how to boil noodles. Wowie wow wow wow. Alright, raise your hand if you think Ignacio and Ari are going to be a thing by the end of the series? Hmm, just about all of you? Figures.

• Yo, I’ve just hit the halfway point of the episode and I’m now listening in as Claire gives Kal a lesson on how to be a waiter.

• The animation shares my pain:

Like my brain, it too is disintegrating before our very eyes.

• One kick from de Alarcon has Bandareas rubbing his shin for a good minute. I guess despite all those muscles he’s not that manly.

• Just look at these faces. I haven’t seen such faces of pleasure since “Yaranaika:”

It’s just ramen too. I’m Asian and I don’t even love ramen this much.

• Fifteen minutes into the episode now. The navigation officer is staring into his empty ramen bowl with disbelief. He says, “I can’t believe a student made this.” And I say, “I can’t believe an adult made this anime.”

• Meanwhile, Sonia is actually have an afterglow. An afterglow from eating ramen. Yeah man, Japanese food is so good it can even give their women orgasms. Well, I mean, something has to…

• …what? I’m just talking about the extremely low occurrence of sex in Japan these days! Maybe ramen’s the culprit! Didja ever think of that? Instead of NoFap, we should have NoRamen. I know it’d at least make this show a whole lot better.

• De Alarcon teases Sonia: “You looked as if something had stolen your heart away.” I’ll have what she’s having!

…I’m begging you…

• “It was wonderful,” he continues on. It was ramen. I feel like I’m taking crazy pills.

• Dat animation again…

• So finally, at the 16-minute mark, the plot rears its ugly head when Bandareas confronts de Alarcon over Commander Leopold’s decision to use students in the recon mission. Bandareas is none too pleased about sending kids into a potential warzone. But here’s what I find puzzling… Leopold didn’t want to send his own men out on a recon mission into uncharted territory because he didn’t want to frighten the people of Isla. So how is it any better to send kids into uncharted territory? You mean to tell me that this won’t scare people, but sending adults will? Are you serious? Don’t make me get the ramen!

• De Alarcon’s doing a fine job by discussing such important matters out in the open like this. Open enough that Chiharu could walk by and overhear the relevant details! Wunderbar.

• Despite what she’s heard, Chiharu decides to tell nobody about it. I guess she doesn’t want to worry them or something? Still, if I were in her friends’ shoes, I’d like to know what I was getting myself into. But regardless, she and Mitty share a tender moment… I guess it’s something.

• So what was that? Two or three minutes of plot at the start of the episode? Then like fifteen minutes of orgasm-inducing ramen nonsense followed by a short bit of character development for a minor side character? Wow, don’t strain yourself, Toaru Hikuushi e no Koiuta! You’re going to wear yourself out at this rate, and then we’ll never get to see the End of the Sky like you’ve been promising us!

Wow, since the Coupling System is such a huge success, let’s add another generic face to the cast! Annnnd that about sums up this episode. Seriously, nothing happened.

Episode summary: The cat’s finally out of the bag about the Coupling System, and it doesn’t look like Alliance’s governing body is very happy to learn of its existence. As a result, a film crew has come aboard the Cygnus to film a promotional video that will convince the public to embrace the Coupling System. At first, a new pilot by the name of Fromm would be replacing Aoba as Dio’s partner because the new guy is apparently super handsome or something. A test reveals, however, that Dio and Fromm have terrible compatibility, so Aoba’s back in… in place of Dio. Dio’s relegated to being a camera assistant, which he’s none too pleased about. Out of nowhere, Zogilia forces attack our heroes. Fromm and Aoba are unable to mount a successful counterattack, but Dio manages to save the day despite having to pilot a generic mecha. The enemy is forced to retreat once more, and Fromm reveals that he’ll be joining the cast for the foreseeable future.

Thoughts:

• So we start off with a bunch of fogeys complaining about how the Coupling System was prohibited from existing. ‘Cause yeah, it’s definitely been controversial so far. That spearhead move from last week’s episode has all the viewers up in arms and everything.

• “To change the tide of war, the tiger eventually makes its way out of its cage,” someone says. I don’t know what that means personally. What’s a tiger doing in a war? Who fights with tigers? I also like how this new guy straight up says, “Regardless of what the assembly decides, there are plenty of others who will support us.” It’s a common trope that any governing body will be nothing more than incompetent, bumbling fools. Sure, I can buy that. It’s Buddy Complex‘s proposed alternative that has me wary. Oh no, the bureaucratic red tape is holding us back from taking needed action! If only… if only the military would just take things into its own hands. Yeah, yeah! If only the military could act unilaterally without any input from the appointed or elected representatives of some governing body! What could go wrong?

• Back to the Cygnus where juicy plot developments are brewing. Give it to me, Sunrise! Hit me with your best shot! Annnnnnnnnnnd it turns Lene might have to wear a swimsuit for some upcoming promotional video on the Coupling System. Oh boy! But Lene, this will help us win over the public! Won’t you… won’t you objectify yourself for the sake of the war effort?

• This is basically war propaganda at work, but I love how the anime’s tone is so happy-go-lucky.

• Well, I like that Lene didn’t blush profusely at Fromm’s unnecessary compliment. She’s just like, “What?” Then she went straight back to work. I’m just so used to female characters getting all flustered over some uninspired flattery that Lene’s reaction actually surprised me. You cannot, however, certainly say the same for Anessa. Oh well, can’t win them all.

• “You heard? The other pilot for the Coupling System promotional video is a handsome guy.” Fromm barely looks any different from Aoba to me.

• I never would have expected a military ship to have such an extensive selection of beverages for its soldiers to choose from:

• According to Dio, socializing is a not a useful skillset for a soldier to have. Yep, much better to be taciturn. Keep it all bottled up inside, don’t make any friends, and you’ll turn out A-OK after the war ends!

• Looks like Lasha has a thing for Hina. I wonder if he’s going to go all yandere on us when Hina inevitably switches sides.

• That upbeat music again as they film war propaganda….

• Let’s say I’m an Alliance citizen. Let’s also say I’m not sold on the Coupling System. In fact, I need information about it. Alright, let’s start that promotional video then. Let’s see what the Alliance military’s got for us. Personally, if I started seeing hot babes in swimsuits sunbathing on one of the military’s ships, I’d be fucking livid. I’d ask, “This is what I’m wasting my tax dollars on? This is why the war is still ongoing?” I mean, think about it. People die in wars. I know it’s crazy, but trust me! War has casualties! I mean, just ask Dio’s mom. So y’know, I’d be pretty pissed if I saw my soldiers showing off their bodies as if I was looking through a Victoria’s Secret catalog. Then again, this is the future, after all. Maybe in the distant future, every single society on the face of the planet has become otaku-dominated. And as such, this sort of promotional video does do the trick. This would explain why none of the guys had to parade their half-naked bodies on camera like poor Mayu had to. Of course! Why had I not realized this before!

• According to Dio, he and Fromm once had a “Nice Coupling” reaction from a test to determine their compatibility. “Nice Coupling?” Is that the scientific term? I mean, really now….

• I don’t even know what Dio’s all mad about. This is just a stupid promotional video, a.k.a. frivolous concerns for a ~tru3 warrior~. But no, our blond pilot has to get all jealous and butthurt that he can’t Couple with Fromm. B-but I thought he said Fromm was shallow! So tsundere….

• “What in the world is he?” Dio asks. He doesn’t understand how Aoba is so good at Coupling. This isn’t exactly an uncommon question in anime. You actually hear it a lot when the powerful shounen hero shows up out of nowhere and displays the fruits of his hard work and practice. But that’s the thing: most heroes actually work to get to where they are. Well, the good ones anyway. As for Aoba? He’s literally just good because… well, just because. It’s so lame. I can’t even root for the guy because he’s a prodigy for no reason whatsoever. Who wants to root for someone who has everything handed to him on a silver platter?

• Wow, Dio managed to save Aoba! How awesome! In response, Dio mutters, “It’s my mission.” I mean, it’s not like he wanted to or anything. It’s just his duty as a soldier!

• So uh, after six weeks, what exactly is Buddy Complex‘s endgame? The anime’s feels more like the stupid Zogilia goon of the week rather than a full-blown war. And you know what? That is just boring as hell.

• It doesn’t help either that there’s no complexity whatsoever to Aoba’s character. None. With a lot of mecha protagonists, they will often have a dark past or family members who have died under mysterious circumstances. Aoba, on the other hand, is just a high school kid with no particular baggage to even shine a spotlight upon. He wants to talk to Hina and that’s about it. No, I don’t want him to be the emotional, whiny mecha protagonist, but at least stand for something. At least have a raison d’être. But Aoba has nothing. He just wants to talk to Hina.

• And wow, Fromm was so full of character and personality, let’s keep him around indefinitely!

But he’s hot… or something. So at least he’s got that gong for him.

Sometimes, it really feels as though Wizard Barristers is cheating. Something just bothers me about how the whole episode played out. Let’s see if I can get to the bottom of it. Everyone’s got magical powers, right? So literally, when things are beginning to go pear-shaped. one of the characters will just wave his or her magic wand and voila~! Mystery solved! I know, I know, there isn’t actually any magic wands in the show. Plus, I’m not trying to short-changed Kiri-jii, Cecil’s partner for the week; it’s true that Cecil could learn a thing or two from the lecherous old man with the Hitler ‘stashe. But here’s how things played out this week as I saw it.

Cecil isn’t exactly wrong about Kiri-jii; he does have a very blase attitude that isn’t typically conducive to solving a murder mystery. But as soon as the episode realizes that it needs to wrap itself up, the plot suddenly accelerates itself to a feverish pitch. Oh look, isn’t it a coincidence that one of the victim’s co-workers had the same exact work schedule? Let’s go interrogate him then! Oh no, he’s stonewalling us. What do we do! I know, I’ll just appear to the suspect as his late manager and make him confess. Wham, bam, thank you ma’am. Please come back next week for ‘nother quickie in the justice system.

Maybe my problem is that I actually like all the procedural stuff. I like watching the characters sift through the clues and rack their brains until they find something — anything — that they can work with. When this is the case, mysteries don’t usually resolve themselves in a single episode. Instead, the story becomes a slow burner as the characters race against time to get the innocent person off the hook. Yes, yes, I know this isn’t what Wizard Barristers is aiming for. I know it just wants to flesh out the side characters as Cecil’s character slowly matures before our very eyes. Still, there’s just something very dissatisfying about the way magic is being used.

Magic should add something to the narrative, but it feels like it’s actually taking away from the story instead. It’s becoming the “Get Out of Jail Free” card and literally so this week. And I could forgive the show if the magic was at least being used in a clever or meaningful way, but that’s not what happens. Kiri-jii simply made himself appears as the murdered victim to the suspect, who then practically shits his pants in a hurry to confess. And so what exactly do we learn this week? That Cecil should be more patient and observant like her partner? But even with the clue of the similar work schedules alone, they couldn’t solve the case. Kiri-jii has to pull his illusion trick, a power that Cecil doesn’t currently have. Well, she doesn’t have it yet. For all we know, she’ll probably end up gaining this very same power in the following weeks to come, but you get my point.

So for all the talk about how Kiri-jii is wise beyond his years, his sagacity isn’t exactly what ended up solving the case. The suspect was under no obligation to answer any of the good guys’ questions. If he had stayed calm, then what? What could the good guys have done? And even then, intuition isn’t objective proof. There was still a small chance Kiri-jii had been wrong. What if he had tricked the wrong person? What if they had “confessed” despite being innocent? It isn’t out of the question, y’know. Lots of people have mistakenly confessed to crimes they didn’t commit because they were under pressure. For a show concerned about justice, I think Wizard Barristers is just being a tad too carefree. So although the old man’s intuition did get them on the right path, he still had to cheat to get the job done in time. And as I’ve said, that cheat is not exactly something that Cecil can rely upon. What if Kiri-jii hadn’t had magical powers? What if he couldn’t magically coax a confession out of our suspect? What then? Would the suspect have gotten away with it? Maybe our unlikely duo would’ve solved the case anyway, but at least that ending would’ve been earned.

If these episodes aren’t about the mysteries — and it’s clear that they are not — it still doesn’t seem as though Cecil has really gotten anything from them. Yes, we’re supposed to think that she now has a newly found respect for her elderly colleague, but did she really learn to solve similar cases? I don’t know if we can get a clear answer to this question, and maybe that’s the real reason behind my discontent for this week’s episode.

Oh yeah, can we go a week without someone threatening to molest the main character? Yeah, ’cause that would be great.

We all knew he had to die at some point. It’s just history, man.

Episode summary: Nobunaga continues to be MIA as the day of his father’s funeral draws near. During the funeral itself, the conspirators within the War Council continue to insist that Nobukatsu becomes the next clan leader, to which the younger brother reluctantly accepts. Nobunaga finally shows up, but says nothing as he throws some ash and sakura petals around before disappearing off to god knows where again. Infuriated by his actions, Jeanne decides to leave once and for all, but when she hears a beast crying in the distance, she rushes to see what’s going on. There, she encounters Nobunaga training his body beneath a waterfall, but she also spots a sniper attempting to assassinate the protagonist. The sniper pulls the trigger, but Himiko appears out of nowhere to block the shot instead. Meanwhile, Mitsuhide has taken it upon himself to assassinate Nobukatsu. He thinks that if the younger brother assumes leadership of the Oda Clan, the War Council will never allow Nobukatsu to relinquish it. And seeing as how Nobukatsu is hopelessly inept at leading even a field trip to the zoo, I guess we have no choice but to kill the guy.

Thoughts:

• That person on the left is supposed to be Nobukatsu:

I honestly hadn’t realized how physically small the guy actually was. He looks like a small child next to Ichihime.

• It’s telling that Nobukatsu sits with all the women:

If you’ll notice, all the men have weapons next to them, so you could say that the right side of the room is reserved for the War Council. Why Nobukatsu hasn’t been trained as a warrior, however, is beyond me.

• Even Ichihime’s like, “Man, I’m sick of your needy shit. Just grow up and make your own decisions in life already.” Still, Nobukatsu chickens out: “I will do it as my brother’s proxy.” Get a backbone, son.

• But you guys have to understand that this contrast between Nobukatsu’s effete demeanor and Nobunaga’s larger than life machismo isn’t just happenstance. The contrast is being put on display for a reason. Do you find Nobunaga appealing as a character? Do you like his brash, overly-compensating style of leadership? Now compare it to Nobukatsu and ask yourself which of the two you’d prefer. Personally, I think they’re both fucking idiots, but people like to take sides. People like divide themselves into teams (“I’m on Team Jacob!”). Call it cynical if you want, but I think it’s all too easy for storytellers to manipulate the audience. It’s all too easy to get people to swallow Nobunaga’s tripe when Nobukatsu is rendered as such a pathetic, little worm. The narrative is practically beating us into submission with the fact that Nobukatsu is weak and ill-prepared to lead. We almost want to beg Nobunaga to return under the pretense that he can somehow restore balance to the proceedings with his relentless masculinity. When you have the pushy advisors bully the little brother, the audience can’t help but think, “Enough already! Nobunaga would never stand for that shit!” That’s true, but… that doesn’t mean Nobunaga’s right either. Nobukatsu being completely worthless doesn’t make Nobunaga worthy by default. It’s an important distinction to keep in mind.

• Lo and behold, the macho Nobunaga is exactly what we get. In fact, he can’t just crash the party funeral. He has to enter with half of his broad, chiseled chest sticking out:

And of course, he has to throw one of the many faceless guards around. Why? Because fuck… Nobunaga is manly!

• Even Nobunaga’s thundering footsteps are beast; the entire room is shaking from them and them alone.

• And the anime’s like, “Which would you prefer? An imperfect man who can make mistakes from time to time… or a child?”

Well, if you put it that way, Mr. Strawman…

• Even the lack of words here from our protagonist is important to note. The title of the episode is “Strength,” by the way. I think you can draw your own conclusions.

• And with just a single glance, Nobunaga freezes his opponents in their tracks:

His burning will alone conjures up a vortex of sakura petals. He is the tru3 warrior of Nippon.

• Make no mistake about it: the age-old trope that we saw in Buddy Complex is here in this anime as well. Y’know, the one about ineffectual governing bodies preventing men of action from doing what they need to do? Yes, these conspirators in the War Council are not exactly your standard bread-and-butter governing body, but the War Council is nevertheless analogous to one. And the implicit conclusion here is that had everyone listened to Nobunaga in the first place, i.e. had they taken the war to Takeda instead of waiting for Takeda to come to them, perhaps Nobuhide would still be alive today. But like Nobukatsu’s bizarrely effeminate portrayal, this is nothing but a strawman.

This isn’t some War of the Roses-esque struggle between several intelligent but devious leaders vying for power. It’s just a bunch of bumbling idiots fucking up so much that Nobunaga gets to win the people’s heart by default. Take the main crux of their argument. These men endlessly parrot the idea that Nobukatsu is fit to lead when it’s so patently obvious that the younger brother wouldn’t even be able to decide between having Lucky Charms or Fruit Loops for cereal in the morning. These “fools” are nothing but a strawman designed to make us side with Nobunaga. These men are so comically incompetent that, again, you can’t help but think Nobunaga is in the right.

• And so we are told that “[w]ar is coming.” As a result, the Oda clan cannot afford to dawdle. It then becomes an issue of just picking the least offensive option, and of course, with all the strawman arguments that we’ve been getting, there’s really only one choice that the anime wants us to make.

• And if you can’t handle Nobunaga, it’s really your fault: “Unless you are strong enough to see his goals and to support him, you cannot hope to stay beside such a man in these war-torn times.” Again, it’s war-torn times, i.e there’s no time to think. There isn’t even time to talk as Nobunaga has clearly and succinctly demonstrated. Don’t even bother to understand any of his actions. Since it’s war-torn times, you just gotta stick with the warrior even if he’s an asshole.

• Nobukatsu is obviously naive if he thinks he can unite his people and avoid going to war with the rival clans at the same time. Keep in mind, however, that his naivete is purposeful. He can have good intentions, but ultimately, he can never be right.

• So Jeanne sees Nobunaga screaming over and over beneath a waterfall and this is supposed to convince her of what exactly? But it’s okay, because creepy childqueen got shot in the process. It’s okay; she finally got penetrated like she’s always wanted.

Literally, her character’s only function within the anime is to bestow upon Nobunaga a Regalia, fawn all over his dick, then die in his arms as she continues to profess her unconditional support for him. I had no idea being a childhood friend with a Japanese guy was so contractually binding. In any case, good fucking riddance, creepy childqueen.

• I guess you could say…

…Nobukatsu simply ran out of time!

Well, you’ve done it now, Inari. It wasn’t even your power to begin with! You can’t just go passing it around like a blunt!

Episode summary: Inari and her three friends go on a vacation to the beach. Things try to get pretty heavy when Maru refuses to be friends with Akemi, and Akemi reveals that she’s jealous of Inari’s close friendship with Keiko. In the end, it looks like our heroine attempts to hand off her divine powers to the troubled Akemi, which is just about the dumbest thing Inari could’ve done.

Thoughts:

• The joke faces in this anime are not bad:

Not bad at all.

• I didn’t know gods had dating services.

• Oh man, even Inari, Konkon, Koi Iroha has a beach episode. Well, I can at least count on this show to keep the fanservice to the minimum, right? Right?!

• What the hell was Touka talking about here anyway?

• Akemi thinks Inari’s parents are wonderful because they have the free time to take Inari and her friends on wonderful family vacations. Y’see, Akemi’s parents are always busy with work, work, and more work. What a pity! Oh dear, here we go again. What am I exasperated about, you ask? Anime — and Asian live dramas to a certain extent — has this tendency to act as if career-oriented parents are selfish. Just you wait… it’ll turn out that Akemi has some crippling issue born out of her parents’ unintentional neglect. Yes, not having your parents around as much as you’d like must totally suck, but we don’t know the whole story. We don’t know why Akemi’s parents feel the need to be away all the time. All we see is a sad shoujo. So y’know, forgive me if I don’t feel like picking up my pitchfork in righteous indignation just quite yet. And that’s just the thing: we don’t get to see the whole story from either side. We certainly do get to see Inari’s family when they are happy — when everything is going oh so swell — but do you honestly think a family where the main breadwinner is a mangaka never runs into any sort of financial worries or troubles? Now who’s being naive?

• Aw c’mon:

You’re middle schoolers. I’d say hold onto that small bit of innocence for as long as you possibly can. No, I’m not talking about sexual innocence. Rather, I’m talking about a young girl’s innocence from the objectifying gaze. The world does a good enough job policing women’s bodies already. As a child, you’re somewhat safe from that… so don’t start shaming yourself already, y’know? Pretty soon, people are going to start doing it for you, so what are you in a hurry for?

• So Akemi and Keiko… is this lesbianism or is it fetishism? What do I mean by this? Well, what we’ve got here is the easily frightened Akemi who squeals as soon as a guy even touches her shoulder. Then to contrast her behavior, we have the tough, tomboyish Keiko who immediately tells the guy off… but not before grabbing his wrist to show him she means business. So we have the familiar relationship dynamic once again where one person is dominant, i.e. the knight in shining armor, and the other is submissive, i.e. the troubled maiden who needs saving. And y’know, it’s such a tired dynamic too. The thing is though… most heterosexual couples in fiction aren’t even this stereotypical anymore. How often do you see a guy fend off multiple creeps attempting to hit on his girlfriend? Nowadays, that trope will often be turned on its head. Nowadays, if you try to act all alpha male in defense of your girlfriend, she’ll get mad at you: “Uh, I could’ve taken care of myself. You’re my partner, not my father.” So as you can see, we’ve come a long way in terms of viewing and understanding gender roles. You only ever see this trope play itself out normally in trashy stories like what you’d find in a harem anime.

Don’t get me wrong. Obviously, I’m going to offer my support to my girlfriend whenever she needs help; it’s a partnership for a reason. But at the same, I understand that she’s an independent woman who can handle her own problems. She’s not my child; she’s not even a child. She doesn’t need to be her white knight. But whenever I see mainstream same sex couples in anime, it’s like we’re back to square one! There’s a dominant partner and a submissive partner. It’s almost like we don’t really care how relationships actually work in the 21st century. It’s as if we only want to see two people of the same sex hook up, and putting them into a stereotypical relationship dynamic is the path of least resistance to getting that “money shot,” i.e. that dokidoki moment where they stare into each other’s eyes, mentally preparing themselves for a kiss. And maybe it’s just me… but I think that’s fucked up. Having Akemi and Keiko act out antiquated gender roles, especially when they’re both of the same gender, is patently ridiculous.

• “Her emotions are… sparkling.” Man, remember the last time something sparkled in anime? It wasn’t pretty, I’ll tell you what.

• But honestly, Uka’s ability to feel Inari’s emotions is starting to seem a little weird to me. That sort of thing, Inari’s emotional state, should ideally remain private unless the girl specifically wishes to share them. And yes, I’m sure she’s close to Uka so she doesn’t mind… for now, but there has to be limits, no? Plus, what about Uka herself? Is it healthy to live your emotional life vicariously through someone else’s experiences? It can’t be. I’m sure goddesses need emotionally fulfilling moments of their own too, but I’m afraid the story’s solution to this will be to pair her up with Touka.

• And there you go:

My eyes are rolling so hard right now.

• To be honest, I wouldn’t want to be friends with Akemi either. She’s so helpless:

It’s pretty pathetic. You can’t even use the excuse that she’s just a middle schooler, ’cause Keiko’s one too and so is Inari. They’ve both had the courage to save her ass when she couldn’t even help herself.

• I really don’t like Akemi’s character right now. What the hell is this nonsense: “When she helped me earlier, I felt like we’d finally become friends… It made me so happy. But I was wrong. I misunderstood…” Quit being so dramatic. She said she had to pee. Get real. Yes, I know it was really Inari trying to get herself out of a tricky situation, but c’mon, who acts like this? Uguu, she suddenly ditched me because she had to pee… I GUESS WE’RE NOT FRIENDS AFTER ALL.

Quit being so helpless too. You’re being your own fucking problem. Maru doesn’t want to be your friend? That’s her loss. Get a goddamn backbone. But instead, the anime pretty much blames her parents for her own crippling inability to make friends:

GAWD, if my parents weren’t always working so hard to provide for me and ensure that I have a good life, I wouldn’t be such a loser. I totally wish my parents were more like Inari’s parents! ‘Cause who needs a career when being a mangaka is more than enough to take care of a family of four with frequent vacations to the beach!

• “…all Sanjo talks about… is you.” Well gosh, I wonder who Keiko’s been friends with longer. Is it possible that people will talk highly of their best friends? Why don’t they talk about me who they’ve only become acquainted with an episode ago?!

• I’m actually a pretty emotional guy. I hate watching depressing stuff. You think I can sit through the intro to Up with a straight face?

Hell no. Watch The Color Purple? Don’t even start with me. But this…

…this just doesn’t do anything for me. What should’ve been one of the emotional high points of Inari, Konkon, Koi Iroha‘s narrative just feels… petty.

…w-why?

Probably the two worst shows of the season outside of the Harem Hill nonsense.

Golden Time Ep. 18

Trust me, buddy… I would if I could.

Episode summary: It looks as though Koko’s slowly going crazy from Banri’s absence. Meanwhile, Banri revisits his high school and reacquaints himself with his former classmates. Then they play dodgeball. Whoo, don’t get too rowdy now! At the end of the night, Banri revisits that fateful bridge and it stirs up an old, deep memory… or something. I still think it would be funny as hell if Banri’s ghost was actually his twin brother that everyone has decided to pretend they can’t see.

Thoughts: What a boring ass episode. It was all fluff. The Koko fluff was at least kinda funny, I guess, but the fluff with Banri? Just a complete bore. Seriously, who breaks out into a speech every time they have a conversation? ‘Cause it sure as hell felt like that’s what Banri did all episode long. Walking to the school? Lemme tell you about my realizations about life and how I want to change how I’ve been acting! Walking home from the school? Lemme tell you again how I am me and that I want to live my life. Jesus Christ. And don’t think I’ve forgotten about Linda. Oh ho, I saw how the camera panned down to her putting her hand on the back of Banri’s hand. Inappropriate, missy. I’m still totally serious, by the way. She has no respect for either Banri and Koko’s relationship or whatever the hell it is that she shares with Mitsuo. Look, in the ideal world, two friends can platonically place their hands upon each other’s hands briefly without it being a problem. I don’t disagree with that. But knowing what we know, Linda’s actions are hardly platonic. And because of that, I think she is a terrible friend to not just Banri, but Koko and Mitsuo as well.

* * * * *

Mahou Sensou Ep. 6

Episode summary: The good guys manage to get Mui’s brother back on their side, but they had to trade Takao and Hotaru for him, I think. Not a fair trade if that’s the case. At the end, we see the main character’s brother join the dark side. Oooooh.

Thoughts: In the first half of the episode, there’s an extended fight scene between Momoka and Kippei. Supposedly, there’s bad blood between them, but that’s the problem. We’re only told that there’s bad blood between them; the anime doesn’t show us why they hate each other as much as they do. So why exactly should I care about this fight? I hardly know who Momoka is. I only know that she’s the headmistress of the magic academy and… well, that’s about it to be quite frank with you. Then when it comes to her opponent Kippei, I know even less about him. As far as I’m concerned, he’s just another generic, run-of-the-mill evil guy that you can find just about anywhere. Oh, he used to be Momoka’s senpai? Oh, he killed someone she was close to? But again, we don’t see any of this. We only hear about it after the fact. So the battle has no stakes whatsoever. It’s just ten minutes of two complete strangers duking it out for reasons completely alien to us. That’s bad storytelling #1.

Here comes bad storytelling #2: Mui’s devotion to her brother. She constantly pleads with him to return to normalcy. She constantly begs for him to smile again. Seeing this, Takeshi can’t help but compare Mui’s troubled relationship with her brother to his own fractured family life. But you know what? It’s just not enough. We wasted so much time on that bullshit love triangle between Takeshi, Mui and Kurumi, so as a result, none of this yearning for sibling love makes any sense. Yes, I’ve seen a touching example of sibling love in other anime, but I don’t see one here. From this, you start to see where the problem with generic storytelling truly lies: a lot of the bad anime are just trying to piggyback off of what other shows have already done. It’s like I’m supposed to feel sorry for Mui just because I’ve seen sad imoutos elsewhere. Oh man, wasn’t it sad in x and y anime? So by extension, I should feel sad for Mui! But nope, storytelling doesn’t work that way.

And then the action scenes… dear god, how is it possible to make magic seem so boring? At one point, the good guys attempt to ensnare Tsuganashi by summoning a giant golden key out from the sky. The key then penetrates the ground, which unlocks a giant underground door? Prison? Oh well, it doesn’t matter. Next, our magic users levitate into the air, then begin rotating around the giant golden key in order to turn it. But y’see, this all sounds comical and ridiculous on paper, but when you actually see it in animation, it’s just about the blandest portrayal of magic possible. There’s no excitement, no energy, no anything in the scene! The show can’t even manage to be so ridiculous that it loops back to being funny. The sad realization is that a show like Chuunibyou demo Koi ga Shitai! not only has better magical fight scenes than Mahou Sensou, its fight scenes also manage to be comically ridiculous at the same time. But that’s the thing… I’m not even interested in what Chuunibyou demo Koi ga Shitai! has to offer, so of course, where does that leave Mahou Sensou, which is worse by every measure?

Has the show’s true villain finally appeared?

Episode summary: Guess what? Yukine runs away yet again. Kazuma, one of Bishamon’s many Regalias, warns Hiyori that if Yato doesn’t get rid of Yukine, Yato will die. Speaking of our protagonist, he reunites with Yukine for a job, but finds that Yukine has become dull because of all the conflicts they’ve been having. Yato uses a bottle of purification water to get the job done anyway, and the two of them walk off into the night. All’s not well, however, as Kazuma’s words echo in Hiyori’s mind. Plus, some shady character can be seen talking to Nora; it seems they are both disappointed that Yato’s a goody two-shoes nowadays.

Thoughts:

• Can goddesses catch a cold?

• So not only does Hiyori make breakfast for Yukine, she dutifully carries it on a tray to his room. Quite ridiculous, if you ask me. Is he a pet or is he a friend?

• Yukine’s jealousy just isn’t natural to me. He keeps harping on it every episode, but it doesn’t feel authentic. Instead, it seems like the writers are forcing something that was never really there. After all, Yukine has been by Yato’s side for nearly every single day of the past month. Even when Yukine’s gone off to live with Hiyori, Yato still stalks after him, paying the young kid a visit at night and stuff.

On the other hand, Yukine has only met the other Reglia once. It’s not even as though Yato sits there and goes on and on about how awesome his other Regalia is. It’s not even as though Yato goes out to see her. In fact, he never even talks about her. So I just don’t feel it. I understand that young, immature people can be irrationally jealous, but Yukine’s feelings are coming from out of left field. It’s like “Whoops, we need a conflict. Let’s make the kid jealous without bothering to develop it.”

• Apparently, Nora isn’t solely a person’s name. In Noragami, Noras are a god’s disgrace or something like that — a Regalia with many owners. More importantly, they can’t be trusted because their loyalties are all over the place. Nevertheless, they exist because they can perform tasks that you wouldn’t necessarily want your average Regalia to do. Something taboo, perhaps.

• Bishamon’s get-up at the start of this week’s episode looked pretty cool:

Too bad she’s back to her bikini top and mini-skirt number when we see her again. I mean, at least give the poor girl a properly-fitting top. Lame.

• Goddamn, Kazuma’s got something real bad for Yato: “Please help him. I don’t want to lose him.” What’s going on there, huh?!

• I think it’s a cheap trick whenever a show or a movie cuts the sound just as one of the characters are about to say something important. Now, the same sort of thing didn’t bug me when it occurred in Lost in Translation, because by that point, the story was essentially over. What Bill Murray’s character specifically whispered to Scarlett Johansson’s character is not really all that important in the grander scheme of things. In this episode of Noragami, however, I feel as though the gimmick’s only being used to create an air of artificial suspense. After all, we’ll find out exactly what Kazuma said to Hiyori. We’ll just have to wait for some odd reason, however, and it’s not as though this wait will give us a deeper understanding of either the show or its characters.

• Yukine whines, “You call this a job? You should give up being a god! Or at least go to a temp agency.” Remember how I used to compare Yato to a wannabe rock star? Or an idol. Or an actor. Or whatever it is that young people often dream of becoming, but eventually, they are pushed towards a soul-draining, paper-pushing office job. So Yukine’s words should really be read as, “You call this a job? You should give up being a musician! Or at least go to a temp agency.”

• It’s tiring to see Yukine continue to whine even if he’s just a child. He has Hiyori to dote upon him, and at the end of the day, Yato still tries to take care of the kid when our hero’s been spurned repeatedly. Nevertheless, Yukine thinks he has the right to decide what is and what isn’t a good enough job. I sympathize with how little people care about his feelings, but now he’s gone too far. C’mon, a job’s a job. If it gets food on the table and it isn’t morally objectionable, who cares? The problem is that there’s always this pressure in Japan (and other first world nations to a certain extent) to get that corporate job, so as a result, people look down upon most other positions even if they are good, honest work. This mentality, however, is just unsustainable. We can’t all be white collar workers and there’s no reason to give a blue collar worker any less respect. Respect a person for his or her moral character, not what he or she does for a living.

• “Man, this sucks. Why do I gotta put up with this crap?” All you’re doing is sitting there and reading manga!

• Good lord, really? Of all the things to steal, Yukine steals a box of donation funds for disaster relief victims? This isn’t just a kid acting out. This is more like moustache-twirling evilness. It just seems… weird, y’know? I know the kid’s whiny and ungrateful, but would he actually steal from the needy? There are just some odd narrative decisions being made right now that’s completely taking me out of the story. I can totally understand a selfish character acting out, but this is like Monty Burns level of selfishness.

• So the big ol’ lesson for Yato is that he needs to be more considerate of people’s feelings. He should not just see them as nothing more than mere stepping stones towards accomplishing his dreams and goals. Eh, seems reasonable enough.

• So what Kazuma really said to Hiyori was that if Yato doesn’t dispose of Yukine, Yato will die. Big revelation there. Was it really necessary to keep it a secret until the end of the episode? I think not.

• I’m rather frustrated by the last few episodes because it feels as though Yukine and Hiyori aren’t developing as characters. They don’t have to instantly acquire epiphanies — I’m not asking for the characters to have all the answers to life’s problems — but it doesn’t even feel as though the two of them are making even the slightest bit of progress. Hell, I’d even take regress, but they’ve both remained rather static. The one big step in either direction comes from Yukine, but it’s not even a believable step. Like I’ve said, I can understand him acting out, but I just don’t buy the idea that he would steal from the needy. It’s just too extreme. In any case, my point is that Hiyori still hopelessly dotes upon a kid who sorely needs discipline, and Yukine still obstinately runs away from the people who care about him. It’s been three episodes now and it’s getting to be rather tiring.